24 Pics of Gay Soldiers; Male Full Frontal Nudity: Sense 8; Tom Daley Unrecognizable Wearing Clothes

24 Pics of Gay Soldiers
I’m still on the road, but at least I solved the WiFi issue. I’ll post more about this road trip to Palm Springs, and some LGBT related experiences we’ve had during the trip when I get to PS.
I think it’s amazing that younger gay men have things like this to see nowadays. The only photos of gay men I ever saw when I was growing up weren’t people I could identify with at all.
I think if I had known that all gay men are not the same it would have made growing up a lot easier. 
Male Full Frontal Nudity: Sense 8 
I’ve been watching another Netflix series, Sense 8. It’s an excellent series, with characters you’ll enjoy, and a storyline that will keep you wondering constantly.
And, there’s male full frontal nudity. It’s not too over the top, but it does move the story forward.
Tom Daley Unrecognizable Wearing Clothes
I guess people are so used to seeing Daley wear practically nothing, it’s hard to recognize him with clothes on? I don’t totally get this one. But I have this feeling Daley will be taking his pants off in public until he’s well into his 40s.

‘Outside of the pool I don’t walk around the house in my trunks!’ the Olympic diver says in the new issue of Attitude magazine.

‘The other day, an old lady came up to me and said: “Gosh, I don’t recognize you with your clothes on!” and I guess people see me on TV and diving with no clothes on. It’s nice to go to a photoshoot and actually wear something.’

There’smore here. I love the way they make these quotes without thinking twice about what they’re saying…”old lady.” You have to wonder sometimes. And I’m not sure you can blame that on youth alone. We were all his age once and we didn’t refer to people as, “old lady.” It would have been rude.

New Release

James Baldwin Very Gay Author, and "I Am Not Your Negro"; The Milo Yiannopoulos Berkeley Speech; Rob Mallard From Coronation Street Is Gay

James Baldwin Very Gay Author, and “I Am Not Your Negro”

I’ve posted about James Baldwin as the author of one of my favorite books of all time, Giovanni’s Room, several times over the years. He’s a huge part of gay culture.

Now there’s a new documentary out about James Baldwin titled, I Am Not Your Negro, and I can’t help but wonder if they are trying to play down the fact that he was gay. Or maybe they don’t think it’s important enough to mention, with respect to gay culture. Very few mainstream articles and reviews even mention that he was gay.

In any event, I went all over the Internet to find this article in The Advocate that actually does mention the fact that Baldwin was gay. And, it’s in the title.

James Baldwin (1924-1987) was prolific author and social critic. His works include novels (“Another Country” and “Giovanni’s Room”), poems, plays (“The Amen Corner”) and essays (“The Fire Next Time,” “The Devil Finds Work” and “Notes of a Native Son”). He was also a passionate and eloquent public speaker, appearing frequently on televised debates and on talk shows like “The Dick Cavett Show.”

“He was probably one of the biggest authors of his generation, black or white” Peck says. “He was an important witness to the Civil Rights movement. He was gay. He was an intellectual. He had an immense celebrity. He was friends with people like Marlon Brando, Sidney Poitier, Lena Horne and Nina Simone.”

You can read the rest here. I’m definitely looking forward to seeing it for many reasons, and one of those reasons has to do with the fact that Baldwin is a huge part of gay culture and that he influenced millions of gay readers.

The Milo Yiannopoulos Berkeley Speech

Here’s a part of recent gay culture that I’m tempted to ignore, but won’t. It’s happening right now, and it’s news. Please forgive me if I spell his name wrong sometimes.

This article is all about what happened at Berkeley, and Milo. I’d rather not go into detail. I’m just not personally fond of pundits who exploit for attention or personal gain, gay or straight.

32-year-old Yiannopoulos goes to great lengths to brand himself as a sort of “free-speech fundamentalist” locked in fierce battle with “political correctness.”

On Facebook, he touts himself as “the most fabulous supervillain on the Internet.”

You can can read more about this here. I think the discussion in the comment section is as interesting as anything I’ve seen so far. You’ll want to check that out, too.

Rob Mallard From Coronation Street Is Gay

It seems another male celebrity, Rob Mallard, recently came out as gay. I’m not playing that down either. I think it’s wonderful. Here’s part of what he said…

“I never planned to keep it quiet that I was gay. The only concern I had at first was if I’m with a female character, will an audience who knows I’m gay in real life believe it? But that was just my own fears because I do believe they will,” the 25-year-old actor said.

He’s adorable and it’s a great article, and you can find it here. And there’s a place where you can follow him on Twitter to show support. I just did.

New Release


Grindr Lawsuit; How To Take A Good Dick Pic; The First Texas Transgender Mayor

Grindr Lawsuit

Here’s another one of those stories about hook up apps.

A man is suing Grindr for their part in what he believes was a failure to deal with an ex-boyfriend who allegedly impersonated him.

Matthew Herrick, an actor in New York City, has said he met his former partner on Grindr in 2015. He claims after a series of abuse, his ex tried to rape and kill him.

After he met his ex-partner, Herrick claims the man began to create fake profiles of him using his photos and addresses.

The rest is here. I hope there’s a follow up. I don’t like to speculate on things like this without more details. I’m not CNN or Fox.

How To Take A Good Dick Pic

I think it’s okay to say Dick Pic on blogger, at least I hope it is. I keep this blog rated G because I know how blogger can be, and I respect that.  I don’t want the blog to be concentrated on sex just because I’m a gay author. And, this article really isn’t about sex. It’s more about how and when to send a dick pic without being totally offensive, repulsive, and outright rude.

However, not everyone is happy to be on the receiving end of a dick pic, and historically, dick pics haven’t found favor with many women. Traditionally functioning as little more than advertisements for the sender’s size, dick pics are bombarded at women online — usually without consent — and they’re almost always of dismal quality: low-lit, blurry pictures taken at unflattering angles with no erotic potential whatsoever.

You can check this out here. As someone who has been on the receiving end of more unsolicited dick pics than I care to count, it does give some valuable advice.

The First Texas Transgender Mayor

Interestingly, this is all taking place in New Hope, Texas. I didn’t even know there was a New Hope in Texas. I just hope they’re as progressive out there as New Hope, PA is here where I live. Thanks to the fact that I live in New Hope, PA, transgender people are nothing new to me.

Eight months after taking office, a Texas mayor has come out as transgender in an open letter posted on her small town’s website.

“As your Mayor I must tell you something that has been with me since my earliest memories,” New Hope Mayor Jess Herbst writes. “I am Transgender.”

You can read her full statement here. She’s married to a woman and has 2 daughters, all of whom have been completely supportive. I’ve said it before on this blog and I’ll say it again: I think we’re going to hear a lot more stories like this in the future.

New Release


A Few Thoughts On the 2016 Election and the Future For LGBT People

A Few Thoughts On the 2016 Election and the Future For LGBT People

As most people who’ve read this blog know, I’ve never been too political about anything in a general sense. I will get into issues like marriage equality because I believe in them. I believe in equality for everyone. In a general sense, however, I don’t preach politics to anyone because I don’t think I’m qualified to do that. I also respect all opinions, not just my own. And from what I’ve seen this week on social media from all sides, I truly believe it’s time to start healing from this past election and it’s time to move forward. As Secretary Clinton said in her well-executed concession speech, there’s a lot of work still to be done.

With that said, I also believe it’s important for the LGBT community…and everyone else who falls under that umbrella…to work together in order to maintain everything we’ve already worked so hard to obtain. Obviously, I’m not coming from a place of privilege, and most of the people reading this aren’t either. I don’t use politics and I don’t exploit your emotions (or your disappointment in this election) to get you to read another one of my books. I give you all more credit than that. I’ve seen a few authors do that this week, and frankly it bothers me to see them use good people that way. It’s shabby and it’s a different kind of porn. And I know a lot of you are scared and worried about what’s going to happen in the future. That’s reasonable and understandable. We’re all a little worried. As an openly gay man I’ve felt that way many times in my life.

I don’t want this to be a long post, but I do want to get one main point across for ALL the people who have been let down this week by this election. If you look back at LGBT history, and the gay liberation movement…a time that was long before authors who care more about selling their books than they do about people…you’ll see that every single LGBT battle was fought for, and won, by LGBT people who came together and worked hard. Harvey Milk didn’t depend on politicians, he became one. These battles, including same sex marriage, were not won thanks to any individual politician. They were won thanks to the strength and the spirited activists who were passionate about them.

I think that’s going to continue, and we’re going to keep moving forward. The LGBT community is not the same as it was 8 years ago. We’re stronger and we’re more powerful. We also have more allies. Look at it this way. After years of fighting, we took same sex marriage to the highest court and we won. It started out small, and went state by state, but we got there. Don’t forget that more LGBT people are coming out than ever before. I don’t think we’ve even begun to guess how many there are. And we can still continue to move forward and grow even stronger, one step at a time, the same way we always have.

I’m not going to go into dramatic seclusion or go off on personal hiatus because of this election. I don’t need to get my thoughts together. My thoughts are together. I’m going to keep moving forward the same way I always have. I’m going to keep encouraging, especially the closeted people who send me private e-mails. I’m going to keep challenging articles and bloggers I read and link to on this blog that I think are full of crap. Even though I have no idea what to expect in the next four years at this moment, I do know I’m not ready to step back for anyone. And neither should you.   

Is This Ad Campaign For Men’s Clothing Homophobic?; American Horror, Murder House/Coven Crossover; Colton Haynes’ Halloween Costume

Is This As Campaign For Men’s Clothing Homophobic?

Before I even get into this. I think it is homophobic and I’m glad it was called out on social media. I don’t like stereotyping or homophobia of any kind, and this is pretty obvious.

A campaign to find the face of their Autumn/Winter line features a broody male model next to a so-called “real man,” and features the caption: “Real men have balls, not man bags.”

Unsurprisingly, the Twitter minions wasted no time in decrying the ad as “homophobic” and rife with “toxic masculinity,” as well as playing into “old-fashioned stereotypes,” as Attitude reports.

You can check this one out here. There are photos of the ads and you can see for yourselves. 

American Horror Murder House/Coven Crossover

This sounds interesting. I think my two favorite seasons of AHS were Murder House and Coven.

With Roanoke a little more than halfway dun-dun comes news that American Horror Story will be revisiting Murder House and Coven — and at the same time, too. (Scream.)

Characters from both seasons will be mixing and matching in an upcoming crossover season sure to be a monster-mishmash of ideas, set pieces, and intricate plotting straight out of a grammar school sandbox.

Read more about this here.  

Colton Haynes’ Halloween Costume

I saw this on Twitter yesterday and it’s probably the best Halloween thing I’ve seen all weekend.

Then in 2015 he one-upped with his killer Ursula look from The Little Mermaid. There was rejoicing all across the land.

So how did he fare this year?

This year he was Miss Piggy. You can check that out here

Not all of the comments are as kind as you would imagine.  People can be mean sometimes.




Team Foxcatcher and Gay Back Story; Nick Jonas and North Carolina; Family Dollar and Lesbian Customer

Team Foxcatcher and Gay Back Story

In November of 2014 I posted a lot about a film titled, Foxcatcher. You can read that all here. In fact, until right now, I’d forgotten about how strongly I disliked this film. I’m not getting into all that now, but I do want to mention a new Netflix documentary titled, Team Foxcatcher, that’s streaming this Friday night and I’m curious to see how they handle the gay back story…or not. And I’m not the only one who felt strongly about this movie and the way it was handled.

The film never looks properly at rumours of John du Pont being gay. It does imply that Mark and John may have had a homosexual relationship, but that’s so ridiculous that it’s almost laughable.

The film is very misleading in this portrayal. Mark was not gay and barely had any sort of relationship with du Pont. However, Dave Metlzer does write in the Wrestling Observer Newsletter that “The belief is that there was a homosexual relationship with Du Pont and a wrestler, but not Mark.”

The film therefore covers up what could have been an interesting narrative with a wholly unbelievable story about Mark Schultz.

In any event, I’m not getting into this one any deeper than the information I’m presenting right now. However, I am curious to see how this Netflix documentary handles the back story.

Team Foxcatcher, streaming Friday, uses interviews, news clips and home video to look at the years leading up to Schultz’s death, and how du Pont spiraled from a well-meaning benefactor to a convicted murderer. But unlike the 2014 Oscar-nominated drama, which starred Steve Carell, Mark Ruffalo and Channing Tatum, Dave’s brother and fellow wrestling champion, Mark Schultz, doesn’t appear.

You can read the rest of that here, and there’s another in-depth account of how the original movie, Foxcatcher, mixed fact with fiction.

The main reason I’m so curious about this story is that I live in New Hope, Bucks County, PA, and that’s not far from where all this took place back in the 90s. I remember following it in local news at the time it was happening.

Nick Jonas and North Carolina

While Steve Grand followed through with his recent commitment to the Gay Men’s Chorus in North Carolina, which I thought was wonderful for him to do…Nick Jonas is at it again. And this time Jonas showing off his proverbial “guns” in what appears to be an effort to boycott a new law that allegedly discriminates against gays in North Carolina…I don’t know much about the law so I can’t comment on that.

It should come as little surprise that Nick Jonas and Demi Lovato aren’t down with North Carolina’s ugly HB2 law, and now the two singers have become the latest in a string of artists to cancel appearances in the state.

You can read the rest here

You can check out the Steve Grand Tweet here. I hope it works. I’m never sure how to link to Twitter. 

Family Dollar and Lesbian Customer

I’ve seen this story about how a lesbian customer was allegedly discriminated against at a Family Dollar chain store, and frankly it surprised me. About a month ago I was out of town and I saw a Family Dollar store and I stopped in to get a few batteries I needed. I normally never go to Family Dollar because we don’t have them around here. And the male cashier who worked at the Family Dollar store where I stopped was not only gay, he was hot and very, very flirty. So flirty he made me smile.

In any event, here’s what’s happening with the lesbian story.

Yesterday, we reported that a woman named Melissa Langford, 34, alleges she was subject to a load of homophobic comments and denied service by a foul-mouthed Family Dollar cashier; a confrontation that was caught on video.

Family Dollar now says it’s investigating the incident.

You can read more here. I can’t comment on this alleged incident, however, I can tell you that I got really great batteries at the Family Dollar I went to, and I could have gotten date out of it, too, and maybe a little more, from the hot young cashier that took care of me.

But I digress, again.


The Arrangement

Having A Gay Brother; Lexus Gay Docuseries; First Gay Military Service Leader

Having a Gay Brother

I know I’ve mentioned I have a gay brother in NY and a gay nephew in medical school in Iowa, however, I don’t think I’ve ever commented on that in detail. This series of memes is interesting to me because it has quotes from younger gay guys who have gay siblings, and they are growing up knowing this. And I have to admit that’s a novelty for me.

I didn’t even know my brother was gay until we were both in our late twenties and we accidentally and literally bumped into each other in a gay bar. We didn’t grow up knowing this. It’s not that we were ever estranged either. We just didn’t discuss it and we just didn’t talk about it. You didn’t do that in the 1990s. But I was glad when I found out. It made sense to me.

Growing up gay is often an isolating experience, though thankfully that’s beginning to change in a big way.
For many people, the thought of having a gay sibling to relate to during adolescence sounds like it would have been a dream come true.
 And here’s one of the quotes…
Whenever someone is surprised that both my brother and I are gay I feign surprise that their siblings are all straight. 
You can read the other quotes here. They’re all a little different.

Lexus Gay Docuseries

I love this because we just re-leased another Lexus iS 300, and we knew nothing about it while we were negotiating a price with the Lexus Dealership. At least I know Lexus is gay friendly…not that it would have mattered. I really don’t think that way, but it’s still nice just the same.

Luxury automobile brand Lexus launched a new documentary series for their L/Studio film portfolio. This six episode series, called “It Got Better,” is a collaboration between producers Lisa Kudrow and Dan Bucatinsky of the award-winning “Web Therapy” series with the It Gets Better Project. These episodes will feature such GLBT luminaries, including actors Jane Lynch, George Takei and Laverne Cox, professional basketball player Jason Collins, style maker Tim Gunn and recording artists Tegan & Sara.

Here’s the rest. I think it looks wonderful and I’ll post more as I get more info.

First Gay Military Service Leader

One of the things I try to do here on the blog is show people new links for LGBT information on the web. It’s not always easy because you don’t always get links with a simple search. I got lucky with Lavendarmagazine.com, and I hope you check out all of their content with the two links I’ve provided with this post.

In any event,

Fox News reports the Senate Armed Services Committee has confirmed the first openly gay leader of a U.S. military service, voting to approve the nomination of Eric Fanning to be Army secretary.

You can find that one here.

The Rainbow Detective Agency Rancho Mirage

In Print and E-book

Gay Open Marriages; Gay Monogamy; Gay Couples and Dogs

Gay Open Marriages

After I finished writing the last book in The Rainbow Detective Agency (link below) I wanted to do something different. Something that focused on the romance in a gay marriage as well as some of the reality we often don’t hear about. So I worked the open marriage concept into the story line, and a good deal of book seems to revolve around the concept of gay open marriage. 

And I think the curiosity we have about gay open marriages is that they are rarely ever discussed aloud. But they clearly exist. If you do a search you’ll find so much information about this you won’t know where to start.

I thought this piece from The New York Times was one of the best.

The dirty little secret about gay marriage: Most gay couples are not monogamous. We have come to accept lately, partly thanks to Liza Mundy’s excellent recent cover story in the Atlantic and partly because we desperately need something to make the drooping institution of heterosexual marriage seem vibrant again, that gay marriage has something to teach us, that gay couples provide a model for marriages that are more egalitarian and less burdened by the old gender roles that are weighing marriage down these days.

I think the most important factor with any open marriage…gay or straight…is that every couple sets its own terms…or rules. And remember, we’re talking about men here, not women. Men think differently and it creates a new dynamic when the gender politics changes. I know this because I’m a gay man. I didn’t read it in a book somewhere.

You can read the rest here.  

Gay Monogamy

I think the whole concept of gay open marriage goes hand in hand with gay monogamy, and I also think it’s still too soon to tell anything yet. In other words, gay men weren’t allowed to get married for so long…or even come out of the closet…they did the best they knew how to do. And a good deal of that had to do with rebelling against traditional society. If you ever went to a gay bar in the 80s or 90s you know what I’m talking about.

If you do a simple search for gay monogamy, there’s a lot of information. I thought this was interesting. 

“Can two gay men really have a monogamous relationship?”
This recent question to my advice column echoed what I hear from many of my gay psychotherapy clients. “My boyfriend and I have wanted to be monogamous, but neither of us has been able to totally stop the occasional hookup. It’s taken a toll on our relationship in terms of hurt feelings, trust and closeness.”
Noting how he frequently sees other coupled gay guys playing the field, my letter-writer poignantly asked: “Should I just accept that gay men and monogamy don’t mix, and stop feeling bad?”
– See more at: http://goodmenproject.com/featured-content/gay-men-monogamy-combination-jvinc/#sthash.IPoczH9c.dpuf

Well, guys, this one’s sure to get everyone fired up. It seems, that in the dawn of a new era—that being the age of same-sex marriage—we all want to settle down and finally claim our equal portion of the (hetero-normative) American dream. Or do we? After scouring statistics and polls from numerous sources, what I discovered was interesting. No, all men do not cheat; nor do all gay couples consider monogamy and sexual exclusivity one and the same.

You can check out the rest here.  

It’s a little more complicated than it is with straight couples, and I think that’s because when you remove the gender politics…and don’t let anyone tell you there is gender politics in gay relationships because they don’t know what they’re talking about. There’s some gender politics, but not a lot…you get a different dynamic in the relationship. Once again, the fact is that men think differently than women and that plays a huge part in this discussion, too.

Gay Couples and Dogs

Here’s a video about gay couples and dogs that seems about as accurate as it gets.

If you aren’t a dog person, you undoubtedly know a few. And if you’ve spent even a small amount of time around them — in their home, at the dog park, on the beach perhaps — you’ll recognize how disturbingly accurate the below video from Buzzfeed Animals is.

You can watch this here. It’s a little exaggerated…but not by much!

I have one gay male friend who just doesn’t get it. He’s not a dog person and he looks at the rest of us as if we’ve lost our minds half the time.

The Rainbow Detective Agency Rancho Mirage

In Print and E-book

“Can two gay men really have a monogamous relationship?”
This recent question to my advice column echoed what I hear from many of my gay psychotherapy clients. “My boyfriend and I have wanted to be monogamous, but neither of us has been able to totally stop the occasional hookup. It’s taken a toll on our relationship in terms of hurt feelings, trust and closeness.”
Noting how he frequently sees other coupled gay guys playing the field, my letter-writer poignantly asked: “Should I just accept that gay men and monogamy don’t mix, and stop feeling bad?”
– See more at: http://goodmenproject.com/featured-content/gay-men-monogamy-combination-jvinc/#sthash.IPoczH9c.dpIn any event, here’s something I found about gays and monogamy. 

“Can two gay men really have a monogamous relationship?”
This recent question to my advice column echoed what I hear from many of my gay psychotherapy clients. “My boyfriend and I have wanted to be monogamous, but neither of us has been able to totally stop the occasional hookup. It’s taken a toll on our relationship in terms of hurt feelings, trust and closeness.”
Noting how he frequently sees other coupled gay guys playing the field, my letter-writer poignantly asked: “Should I just accept that gay men and monogamy don’t mix, and stop feeling bad?”
– See more at: http://goodmenproject.com/featured-content/gay-men-monogamy-combination-jvinc/#sthash.IPoczH9c.dpuf

“Can two gay men really have a monogamous relationship?”
This recent question to my advice column echoed what I hear from many of my gay psychotherapy clients. “My boyfriend and I have wanted to be monogamous, but neither of us has been able to totally stop the occasional hookup. It’s taken a toll on our relationship in terms of hurt feelings, trust and closeness.”
Noting how he frequently sees other coupled gay guys playing the field, my letter-writer poignantly asked: “Should I just accept that gay men and monogamy don’t mix, and stop feeling bad?”
– See more at: http://goodmenproject.com/featured-content/gay-men-monogamy-combination-jvinc/#sthash.IPoczH9c.dpuf

Gay Sportswriter On Homophobia In NFL; Gay Happily-Ever-After Real Life; Michael Phelps With a Beard

Gay Sportswriter On Homophobia In NFL

Here’s a story about a gay sportswriter who claims the NFL (and most professional sports) is still drenched in a culture that is demonizing gay men. We all know this, but what’s interesting is that someone is finally speaking up about it. I have gone to the proverbial mat myself on occasion defending Michael Sam with people on Facebook who don’t think Sam is treated any differently because he’s gay. My point is always that unless you are gay you don’t have the slightest clue what it’s like so don’t “splain” to me.

In any event, I think it’s time someone brought this up.

In a column titled “NFL still in closet about anti-gay culture,” author Chris Hine discusses his own experience as a gay man working adjacent to the still-homophobic league, as well as recent instances that suggest football is failing to make strides towards acceptance despite an official stance to the contrary.

This one you really should read. Now that gay marriage isn’t a hot topic anymore, these are the topics that are going to take center stage in the future.

Gay Happily-Ever-After

I know a lot of people are starting to get tired of these stories, at least from what I see on Facebook. But I think they’re newsworthy because gay couples are finally getting their own recognition…and I think Facebook is a confused mess as each day passes. One day I’m seeing evangelical updates on my Timeline, the next I’m seeing pornsters, neither of which I really care about. You never know what’s going to show up over there anymore.

In any event, this is the gay happily-ever-after that Downton Abbey completely ignored in their fantastical, unrealistic series finale where only the straight people were allowed to live HEA.

Talk about the role of a lifetime! When stage actor Mo Brady auditioned with Telsey & Company casting director Justin Huff for an ensemble role in the pre-Broadway tryout of Catch Me If You Can, he walked out with the part and the man he’d eventually marry and have a child with.

The cute couple shared their story with Playbill and it’s just as barf-inducingly adorable as you think it is.

You can read the rest here.  The comments, though vicious, are amusing.

Michael Phelps With a Beard

This is not going to change the world, but if you thought Michael Phelps…and his huge hands…was hot before, wait until you see him with a beard.

In the moody spot, we see Phelps in various stages of training, from swimming with a parachute dragging him back to the often-overlooked, entirely necessary sleep component. (In case you were wondering, he dreams about swimming in a never-ending pool. Makes sense.)

As far as commercials go, it’s quite beautiful.

Here’s the rest of that.

The Rainbow Detective Agency Rancho Mirage

In Print and E-book

Blog at WordPress.com.

Up ↑