Posting Photos of RL Friends on Facebook; Raven-Symone’s Advice to Caitlyn Jenner; How Tom Cruise Helped Ian McKellen’s Acting Career

Posting Photos of Friends on Facebook

I have a rule about all social media, not just facebook. If I’m going to post the photo of a real life friend…or anyone…I ask their permission first. I don’t just do it without consent. It doesn’t matter if it’s a group standing in front of a restaurant or a small dinner party at home. I don’t feel comfortable posting anyone’s photo without getting permission. Why, you ask? Because your real life friends might value their privacy and not want their photo posted on your Timeline. Not everyone wants everyone to know what they are doing twenty-four hours a day. There are some people out there who prefer to hold on to whatever privacy they still have left.

I was curious about this and I wanted to know how other people think. Here’s something interesting. 

Here is some good news, however. A study suggests that people who do this may be alienating themselves from those who might be called normal human beings. 

As CBS Washington reports, researchers from three British universities — the University of Birmingham, University West of England, and the University of Edinburgh — have concluded that frequent Facebook photo-posters “risk damaging real-life relationships.”

Whatever you do, don’t post photos of kids without consent from parents. Frankly, I would go berserk if I were a parent and someone posted my kid’s photo on facebook or anywhere.

So when she spotted a friend of her ex-husband posting “literally hundreds of pictures” of her daughter, Elmuts said she expressed her displeasure and asked her to remove the photos. A confrontation ensued, after which the woman unfriended Elmuts on Facebook. 

Here’s a page where there’s a legal discussion about posting photos of friends on Facebook.  

If you do a simple search you’ll find a lot more information out there. But for me the bottom line is short and sweet: just don’t do it without asking for permission first. I had a family member once post images of me online at a family gathering and I didn’t want those photos up. I asked her to take them down and she did. It wasn’t an issue. But that was a family member. If you have to go to a real life friend and request that it could lead to a problem that could have been avoided.

Don’t be that social guy who posts photos of everyone he ever knew in the universe without asking their permission first. And we all know someone who does this all the time in real life. I personally know one who has been posting photos of friends all week and I’ve been getting e-mails about it from more than half the people I know. They aren’t too thrilled about it either.

Raven-Symone’s Advice to Caitlyn Jenner

I’ve been reading more and more articles about how hugely ignored most transgender people are as compared to the privileged and elite transgender person that Caitlyn Jenner is. Some stories are downright painful to read when you see how some trans people suffer. I’ve seen other commentary about how many trans women don’t really want Caitlyn being their spokesperson. I’m not knocking Caitlyn, and neither is anyone else. Her journey has brought the entire discussion out in the open and in many ways it paved the way for people like me writing blog posts about it. However, there are a few strong opinions out there about the way she’s been doing it.

Raven-Symone said this:

‘When I came out, I didn’t go and go hardcore and be like, “I’m going to save the world for LGBT,”‘ The View co-host said on Monday’s episode of the talk show. 

‘You’ve got to learn it. You’ve got to learn it first, and she’s not, really.’

‘Beforehand, I was definitely repping the community, even when I wasn’t saying this is what I was. And I’m not faulting you because yes, we need you. It’s too fast, too soon.’

I found that here.

How Tom Cruise Helped Ian McKellen’s Acting Career

Here’s an interesting article about making the right career choices through gut instinct, but not knowing you’re doing that at the time.

‘I got offered a part in Mission: Impossible II with Tom Cruise, but they wouldn’t let me see the whole script because I might have spilled the beans. I only got my scenes,’ McKellen tells

‘Well, I couldn’t judge from reading just those scenes what the script was like. So I said no. And my agent said, “You cant say no to working with Tom Cruise!” and I said, “I think I will.”‘
It’s a good thing he did.

‘The next day, Bryan Singer asked me to play Magneto and then Peter Jackson asked me to play Gandalf, and I said yes to both.’

And there you are. I hope I made a few of the right career choices this year, too, by finally turning a few things down that I wouldn’t have turned down five years ago. Only time will tell. All I can say is that looking back in hindsight, there are a few things I should have turned down. Sometimes you have to learn the hard way.

You can read more here. 

The Rainbow Detective Agency

Box Set

Four books in One

Rainbow Detective Agency Box Set; The State of Marriage Provincetown Film Festival; John Barrowman Attacked For "Tranny" Word

Rainbow Detective Agency Box Set

This is the first box set of a series I’ve done for digital only books. I did it because I had a few requests from readers, and it does save people money. Instead of paying 2.99 for each book, the box set is 5.99.

In any event, the Rainbow Detective series is m/m romance, with a backdrop of mystery/suspense. I also hope the series is funny for some. I do try to parody a few things when they happen, most of which people probably won’t even realize while they are reading it.

In any event, here’s the box set description:

The Rainbow Detective Agency box set is a perfect combination of erotic romance, humor, mystery, and suspense.

Proctor Gamble is a world famous male model in his mid-thirties when he discovers his business manager has run off with all his money. He’s getting too old to model and all he has left are a few bad investments, one of which is a detective agency in Los Angeles that’s run by a slick-talking hipster type named Blair Huntingdon. With nowhere else to turn, Proctor decides turn the detective agency into a profitable venture and he renames it The Rainbow Detective Agency.

While focusing on the unusual clients that seem drawn to The Rainbow Detective Agency, Proctor winds up falling in love with Blair in spite of Blair’s lack of discipline and his questionable work ethic. Even though they’re great as lovers, they clash constantly as business associates and the conflict never ends. Will the passion and great sex they share be enough to keep them together? Or will the tension from the business leave them lost and alone again? But more important, will Proctor ever see Blair for the man that he is instead of the man he wants him to be?

You can check it all out here, on Amazon. I’m pretty certain I’m doing an exclusive this time, only Kindle.

The State of Marriage Provincetown Film Festival

Here’s another article about the Provincetown Film Festival being held this week up in Cape Cod. I’m posting about this one a lot because I’m in one of the documentaries…The State of Marriage. 

“The independent filmmaking community continues to produce remarkably high quality work, here and abroad, and our feature lineup is a testament to that!” said Connie White, artistic director of PIFF. “We are thrilled to welcome these new films and filmmakers to Provincetown in June, and we know that filmgoers will be engaged and entertained by these adventurous, thought-provoking and accomplished films.”

You can read more here, where there is a trailer for The State of Marriage, plus several more excellent LGBT films.

Unfortunately, I won’t be there for the screening. I wish there had been more time to prepare, but I just couldn’t get out of other commitments this week.

John Barrowman Attacked for the “Tranny” Word

I find this interesting, personally, because when I came out everyone used the word “tranny” and no one took offense to it…well at least I don’t think anyone did. I could be wrong about that, which is why I do find it interesting. And, I never made a habit of using the word myself, not even back then. I’m not even sure why. In the 90’s no one cared about being too PC. I just never felt comfortable using that kind of low end slang. I went to 12 years of private Catholic school. We were taught that the expression “shut up” was offensive.  

Now John Barrowman is taking heat for using the “tranny” word and he’s arguing back.

The argument which exploded today first started back in October 2014, when the Scottish-American entertainer posted a video online in which he used the word ‘tranny-tastic’. 

It exploded back then, with people writing comment pieces and blogs about how the slur was offensive and as a gay man he should know better not to use it.

He responded in a Q&A video, in which he defended the term, made jokes and called the complainents ‘haters’.

You can read the rest here, where it devolves even more for Barrowman.

But what is even more fascinating is that in the comments…and from what I’ve seen personally…those who are LGB, but not T, tend to defend Barrowman and they think transgender people are wrong for being offended.

I still won’t use the word.