Bachelorette Contestants Homophobic? Ian Reisner and Ted Cruz; Lesbian Catfishing Married Gay Man

Bachelorette Contestants Homophobic?

I’ve never seen this show, or The Bachelor. I’m not a huge fan of reality TV because it’s all staged and there’s very little reality associated with it…unless the reality is a homophobic content. You know the kind of comments that people make like, “That’s so Gay.” Evidently, because they think gay is so funny…or whatever.  

Cue the disappointment. And the outrage.

It turns out Clint Arlis and JJ Lane, the two straight Bachelorette contestants who claimed they’d fallen in love with each other while taping the ABC reality show, were only “doing it for the cameras” and that “nothing gay ever happened.”


You can read more here. On Twitter there’s a hashtag that I love…#thatssostraight. People on Twitter have taken to using it whenever they see this kind of passive aggressive homophobia. I’ve done it more than a few times because I see this kind of thing almost two or three times every single day.

Ian Reisner and Ted Cruz

Now they’ve found out that the wealthy gay hotelier, Ian Reisner, donated money to Ted Cruz. For some reason, it feels as if Reisner is being targeted.

Afterwards, Reisner claimed the dinner wasn’t a fundraiser and that he didn’t give Cruz any money, telling New York magazine: “There were no checks given. It was nothing like that.”

Well, it turns out that was a bunch of Bologna with a capital B.

The New York Times has just learned that Reisner wrote a personal check to Mr. Cruz’s 2016 presidential campaign in the amount of $2,700, the maximum allowed by law, right around the time the dinner took place.

The rest is here, with the entire history of this Ian Reisner situation. I would never donate money to Ted Cruz, however, I’m not all that fond of the way some are taking such pleasure in all this. Could it be that the liberal gay press is targeting a gay conservative? I don’t know enough about it to answer that question, but I have seen that done before. 

I have a feeling Reisner will respond to this and I’ll be posting about it yet again before next week is over.

Lesbian Catfishing Married Gay Man

I don’t know what to make of this one either. A young guy named David Messerschmitt who is married to a woman hooked up with someone through a Craigslist ad, thinking it was a hot gay man. Unfortunately, Messerschmitt found out he’d been catfished by two young gay women when he met them at a Washington D. C. hotel.

Gallmon entered Messerschmitt’s room at the unnamed hotel and attempted to rob him. We’d say “that’s when things went wrong,” but this whole mess was clearly wrong from the very beginning.
The young woman claims that Messerschmitt trapped her in the room, triggering a previous trauma from a past assault.

At least that’s the argument she’s using in court to try and explain how she came to stab Messerschmitt seven times in the abdomen, groin and heart, killing him.

She made it out of the room with $40 cash and Messerschmitt’s metro card, and walked hand-in-hand with Johnson to a bus stop. Housekeeping found Messerschmitt’s body the next day, his arms bound in rainbow-colored zip ties.

The rest is here. I know I say this all the time, but I think it shows how many more gay people there are out there posing as straight. And it goes without saying how dangerous online hook ups can be.

The Rainbow Detective Agency: On Fleek

Transgender Convict Denied Hormones; Gay Teen Big High School Struggles; Your Porn Searches Aren’t Private

Transgender Convict Denied Hormones

A transgender convict who was sentenced to serve time in a Georgia prison was allegedly raped seven times while in prison. She’s also been kept with male prisoners and they’ve denied hormone therapy to her.

Keep in mind this is a convict who was charged with burglary and “other punishable offenses.”

‘During intake, I kept saying: “Hello? I’m trans? I’m a woman?”’. Diamond told the New York Times.
‘But to them I was gay. I was what they called a “sissy.” 

So finally I was like: “O.K., I’m a sissy. Do you have a place where sissies can go and be O.K.?”

They did not and as a result Diamond says she has been raped at least seven times during her sentence to date.

The DOJ got involved in a lawsuit against the Georgia Department of corrections and it gets more complicated.

‘By taking action in this case, the Justice Department is reminding departments of corrections that prison officials have the obligation to assess and treat gender dysphoria just as they would any other medical or mental health condition,’ Acting Assistant Attorney General Vanita Gupta of the Civil Rights Division said in a statement on Friday.

While I do believe she shouldn’t be kept with the male inmates because she clearly identifies as a woman, I’ve always struggled with other aspects of cases like this. If she hadn’t burglarized (and committed those other offenses) and she hadn’t done anything illegal she wouldn’t be in prison in the first place. Most people in the world go through their entire lives without being convicted of burglary. But then you can’t deny insulin to a diabetic in prison either. That would be morally wrong. 

You can read the rest here. 

Gay Teen Big High School Struggles

This is one of those links where they add the comments to images. I don’t really like them because they tend to make light of the more serious situations, and I think this is a serious situation.

There is no sum of money great enough to convince us to relive our high school years (time travel restraints aside).

Though many high school-era memories are tinted with a rosy glow of nostalgia, the reality is it’s a turbulent time of self-discovery, confusion and learning from mistakes.

For LGBT teens, those qualities are amplified by social stigma, constant ‘covering,’ and in many cases homophobic family and peers.

I have always believed high school is the most difficult time for anyone who is LGBT. This is interesting because it doesn’t seem to have gotten much better since I was in high school. Other than the fact that more LGBT teens are coming out sooner, they are still dealing with those rotten little foul-mouthed straight kids who need a good kick in the ass.

Here’s one:

Being picked on for being gay is not fun. Nobody really knew until I came out and I’m still in high school. Maybe I should have stayed in the closet.

Nope. It doesn’t sound as if much has changed.  The rest are here.

Your Porn Searches Aren’t Private

I think we all understand the horrible tracking and the loss of privacy on the Internet. The other day I did a simple search for shoes and now all I’m seeing are shoe ads all over my facebook and other accounts. The only way to get rid of them is to search for something else, and to make sure I really like it because it’s going to be following me all over the Internet for weeks.

In any event, they are now saying this could happen with porn searches.

“In 2014 a set of celebrities had naked photos released to the public, a deeply disturbing event that was fantastically labeled ‘the fappening.’ Many people brushed off the episode – oh well, I’m not a celebrity,” he continues. “But I think the next big internet privacy crisis could expose the private and potentially embarrassing personal data of regular people to their neighbors…”

Considering that many LGBT people still live in areas where their sexual identity is a crime, the unmasking of adult searches could pose a threat that far exceeds embarrassment.

However, all this could be misleading. (But I think it’s a concern anyway.)

To be fair, in a statement to Vice, adult mega-site Pornhub called Thomas’ conclusions “not only completely false, but also dangerously misleading,” adding that, “Pornhub’s raw server logs contain only the IP and the user agent for a very limited time, never a browser footprint.”

Still, that’s just one response form one company, and Vice notes that 88 percent of the top 500 porn sites have tracking elements installed.

It’s a questionable issue and I see a lot more coming about this.

You can read the rest here.  

The Way We ALMOST Were

A Gay Parody  

 
 

Bullies Who Turned Gay; Rage Over Dick Pic; Jamie Dornan’s Nude Photos

Bullies Who Turned Gay

Here’s an article about people who were homophobic bullies before they realized they were gay. It also discusses how different things were for previous generations of LGBT people, and how differently we grew up from the generation of teens we’re seeing right now.

Here’s one person’s reply:

I mean, I was a young kid, so growing up around other kids in a conservative area (in spite of my pretty liberal parents) I called things I didn’t like “gay,” and people I didn’t like “fags.” I knew being gay meant you were girly and prissy and feminine and deserved to be made fun of.

I didn’t really understand what I was saying, it’s just sort of something you grow up being told about, and you’re told that it’s bad and people who are gay all act a certain way, you know, the typical shit with teenage boys.

You can read the rest here. Frankly, and this might be thanks to my parents, I never did this bullying growing up and I never used homophobic words like that. But I knew people who did.

Rage Over Dick Pic

This is about as Facebook as it gets. A drunk pregnant woman allegedly flew into a rage when she saw her husband looking at a big penis on the computer. The drunk accused him of being gay, punched him, bit him, and threatened him with a knife.

The picture was sent to Scherzo as a joke by a friend of his who happened to be gay. The two men were chatting online. When Hamer saw the photo, prosectors say she “went mad.”

“She started calling him gay and wouldn’t let it go, although he told her it was just a joke,” prosecuting attorney Enza Geldard told a Pennines court this week.

Hamer’s lawyer, Kamran Yousaf, said his client’s behavior was fueled by alcohol and, possibly, pregnancy hormones.

“Clearly, she was aggrieved when she saw that image on the computer and confronted him,” Yousaf said. “She acted wrongly. She shouldn’t have done what she did.”

You can read the rest here. All I’m saying on this topic is that you haven’t seen anything until you’ve seen a jealous berserk woman who thinks a gay man might be stealing her husband away. Or even her boyfriend. It’s absolutely vicious and these women react aggressively. I know this because it’s happened to me.

Jamie Dornan’s Nude Photos

In case you don’t know, Jamie Dornan was the lead in the film adaptation of Fifty Shades of Grey. The film that critics and people with good taste love to hate pushed him into the spotlight almost overnight and now nude photos of him when he was younger have surfaced.

 Before he was pretending to be a dom top or a serial killer or a sheriff in a magical land, the rather gorgeous Jamie Dornan was doing what all fresh-faced 21-year-olds dreamed of in the early 2000’s — gracing the pages of the pansexual Abercrombie and Fitch quarterly catalog.

I wouldn’t get too excited, though. The nude photos of him are as thrilling as the sex scenes in Fifty Shades of Grey and if you’re looking for something interesting you’re better off going to Twitter for male nudes. 

You can see them here.   

Meadows Are Not Forever 


I Guess I’m a Typical Fag: Bonus Homophobia

I Guess I’m a Typical Fag: Bonus Homophobia

Update: I don’t usually see things like this happen, but I figured I would update this post for that reason. Since all this went down, I’ve spoken to the author and we’ve worked things out. He e-mailed me, we both talked about it, and we both realized we said a few things we didn’t mean. Sometimes in life there really is HEA. 

I’ve posted about how I often feel the discrimination and homophobia in many ways. But I’ve never actually given an example, first hand, and I’d like to do that now to show how it still is happening, and this time it came from another author.

On Monday I received a spam e-mail from one of those aggressive self-published authors who has a book out who actually uses offensive ableist language in his own bio on Amazon. Here’s a quote: who drove him into becoming the crazy person he is today. But it wasn’t his ableist language that bothered me. A lot of people don’t know what ableist language is and I understand that. It was the spam e-mail he sent. Here’s the exact e-mail exchange, including his gay-hate slur, verbatim.

Me:  Please stop spamming me and take me off this list. This is NOT going to help sell your book 🙂  Thank you. 

Him:  You are so removed, fool!!!

Me: Drop dead. 

Him:  TYPICAL FAG!!!

And there you are. I’m saving this e-mail exchange, like I do everything else. My first reply was polite, considering I thought I was helping him out by showing him that spamming people doesn’t work. I really did add the little smiley face to show I wasn’t trying to be snarky. My second reply wasn’t as nice. I’ll admit that, but I’m not fond of being called a fool either. But his homophobic hate reply wasn’t necessary and I wanted to show how I actually do face this kind of thing daily. I think most gay people do, even those of us who write about homophobia and try to point it out all the time. There were a million things he could have called me, but he chose the word “fag” based on my e-signature that states I’m an LGBT author. 

The author’s books are on Amazon, and he’s clearly not writing LGBT content or anything related to mm romance. But I’m not adding names or links because frankly I don’t feel safe with people like this. If they will say homophobic things like that I don’t like to think about what they are capable of actually doing. The hate goes much deeper than most people realize. And, I’d rather not promote the loser and help give him hits on his Amazon page.

Wendy Williams Slams Jenner; Chris Lowell on Gay Stereotyping; Michael Sam’s Sexuality a Choice?

Wendy Williams Slams Jenner

I talk about this kind of thing happening all the time and I just never seems to go away. I’m not even getting into details about Bruce Jenner because I don’t really care about them. What I’m talking about now is on a broader level, with respect to how we look at being LGBT and how people like Wendy Williams continue to promote shame. Am I being too PC? I don’t care. I want them to be just as afraid to say the wrong thing about gays as they are about any other minority in the US. I think we’ve earned that. 

Wendy Williams is now speaking out about comments she made about Jenner. You can read that here. This is a direct quote.

“I don’t know what Bruce is going through but I’m happy for him because there’s got to be nothing worse in a person’s life then to not be able to live in their own truth,” she told HuffPost Live. “Whether you’re gay, whether you’re transgender — whatever. Whatever it is.”

That sounds wonderful. No problem. It looks great to me. Until you read this…what she said last 
week:


“Thank God he waited for his kids to grow up before making this transition or whatever it is he’s going through. Can you imagine how awful it would be for those kids if he showed up with a blowout, a shaved Adam’s apple, pink nail polish and smoking a cigarette at a PTA meeting? Could you imagine?”

And, this is another recent quote from Williams, from the first link above:


“People hear what they want to hear, not what was actually said,” she remarked. “Listen, I’m a friend to a lot of communities. You know, I call things as I see them and that’s that.”

Okay. If you go back up and reread the first comment Williams made a week ago I’d like to know how anyone in the LGBT community with self-respect is supposed to interpret that. People aren’t stupid either. And Wendy Williams isn’t talented enough, clever enough, or quick enough to pull off that kind of badass comedy. She’s no Joan Rivers. What she said, no matter how you interpret it, only promotes more shame for the entire LGBT community.

Chris Lowell on Gay Stereotyping

Evidently, more people are becoming aware of how gay characters are portrayed in films. Or at least they are becoming more sensitive to the fact that it’s okay to just add gay characters in a normal way, without making a big deal out of it. This isn’t about labels. I hate when people complain about labels because it implies there’s something wrong with being gay. This is about just putting gay characters in and not talking too much about it. Here’s a statement director Chris Lowell recently made about his gay characters in “Beside Still Waters.” (They spelled Lowell’s name wrong in the article, a shame because everyone else who linked to it did the same. I have a rule. You can call me anything you want; just don’t spell my name wrong. Come on Huff Po, with all of Ariana’s money you can do better than this.)  

“There’s kind of this void in pop culture [in terms of how] homosexuality is portrayed,” Powell said of the character of Tom (played by Beck Bennett). “I was so sick and tired of seeing foppish, over-the-top, broad characters that were…becoming sort of the industry standard of what a gay man or a gay woman looked like.”

The director chose not to include “gay” in the description of the character in the initial script, because he “didn’t want actors coming in and auditioning and doing their version of ‘gay.’ It shouldn’t matter.”

I think this is the trend we’re going to be seeing more of in the future, especially when “gay fiction” becomes even more of a niche market, m/m romance peters out like chick lit did, and gay characters are everywhere in mainstream fiction. I hope so anyway. At least that’s the transition many gay male authors I know are moving toward now. You can read the rest here, where there’s a video clip of “Beside Still Waters.” It looks pretty good.

Michael Sam’s Sexuality a Choice?

We definitely still have a long, long way to go. We’re living in wonderful times with respect to equality, but we’re still being examined and exploited like lab rats to create “artful” fiction, and people still think that being gay is a choice.

Deion Sanders from the NFL was recently quoted saying this about Michael Sam:

“I’m not saying I condone it, but I don’t condemn it,” the Pro Football Hall of Famer said of Sam, who became the first openly gay player to be drafted by the NFL earlier this year. Noting that he’d personally reached out to Sam, he added, “I don’t love what he do, but I love him as a man. And I just wanted him to understand the burden and the weight he’s carrying.” 

When King asked Sanders if he thought Sam’s sexuality could be a choice, the retired NFL player noted, “It could be.”

Explaining further, he added, “The God I know don’t make mistakes.” 

The rest is here, with more examples of Sanders’ ignorance on being gay. As I said, there’s still a lot to work on. But in this case, unlike Wendy Williams above, I don’t think the intent is vicious. It’s fueled by years of misconception.

New Adult Love Story by Bella Stanberry
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Rose McGowan Slams Gay Men; WTF Are Man Crushes;Male Full Frontal Nudity in Fifty Shades Movie; Penis Stories Randal Keiser

Rose McGowan Slams Gay Men

I’m going to try to write this part of the post without getting too angry…even though that’s how I felt when I read about what Rose McGowan said about gay men…again. And while I think her comments are disingenuous, I can’t fault her for being dumb. She clearly knows little about gay men, at least if this is what she thinks. Note: Mr. 1980’s, Brett Easton Ellis, does not identify as gay, as suggested in the quote below. We’re not sure what he is, because he’s, you know, such a rare creative and you-neeeek chucklefuck.

The actress recently sounded off during a conversation with gay author Brett Easton Ellis in his weekly podcast as the two were discussing the boycott the Brunei-owned Dorchester Hotel collection

Owned by the Sultan of Brunei, the Dorchester Collection came under fire shortly after the Sultan implemented a change to the country’s penal code that was scheduled to come into effect on April 22, 2014 and could make homosexuality punishable by stoning to death.

Ellis kicked off the conversation by claiming the boycott only harmed “the people who simply work at the hotel” and was based on “illusionary and tenuous” reports about the Sharia law. He also categorized the boycott as a “form of narcissistic, self-victimisation, gay insanity.”

McGowan added that those who boycotted were “delusional idiots” and criticized them for failing to campaign against the abuse of women in Arab states as well.

“Gay men are as misogynistic as straight men, if not more so,” she said. “I have an indictment of the gay community right now, I’m actually really upset with them.”

I posted about The Beverly Hills Hotel and McGowan’s party last summer, when she was slamming gay men for standing up for something in which they believed. You can read that here. In full disclosure, I don’t believe boycotts work either. As a general rule I don’t waste my time with them. However, I do support those who believe they work because I think that’s the right thing to do. Plain and simple.

But what really bothers me the most is that Easton and McGowan make assumptions about all gay men that are by no means accurate. First, I don’t know one gay man who doesn’t support women. I’m sure there are some out there, but the ones I know all care. Second, Rose McGowan seems to believe that all gay men have the privilege she has to be activists and to fight for equal rights. It’s a huge misconception many who know nothing about gays make all the time. The truth is that the wonderful, dedicated gay activists you see all the time are only a small segment of the gay community. The majority still can’t afford to come out and fight this way because there are still too many obstacles and shames associated with being gay. Third, Rose McGowan is a woman of privilege who cannot and will never understand what any gay man has ever gone through…from birth. The same way I can never understand what women have gone through. Fourth, gay men are still trying to get women to stop exploiting them and treating them as if they are science experiments.

I could continue with this, but I don’t think it’s worth my time. Frankly, I still think McGowan is an idiot and I think her cohort, Easton, would do anything to get some free publicity for that tired pod cast he’s doing online. But they are good examples of a different kind of homophobia.

You can read more here. This link has more links. I tweeted a few things to McGowan but I’m sure it fell on deaf ears. More than a few gay men replied to her and she said nothing of any significance. Her apology was a waste of time, too.

WTF Are Man Crushes

I have to admit that I’ve never really understood the term “man crush.” When I try to relate to it by thinking about whether or not I’ve ever had a “woman crush” I come up with nothing. It’s a complete blank…even though I admire and respect many women. Earlier this week I spotted a guy on Twitter tweet something to a male celebrity C-lister that I follow and I was curious so I went to this guy’s home page and read his Twitter bio. This is what it said:

Current High School Baseball Player & Future Pro. I love girls, pizza & baseball. I’m confident enough in my sexuality to admit my Man crush is…XXXOOO
Clearly, there’s no need for me to mention names and I don’t want to embarrass anyone. That’s not the point. The point is that it’s hard for some of us to understand what a man crush is. The guys loves girls but he’s crushing on a guy. ???? I once read a blog post by a straight male literary agent who isn’t blogging anymore and that literary agent claimed he had a man crush on a famous male chef who has his own TV show. It didn’t get it then, and still don’t get it now. But I think this article at least explains it better than most I’ve seen.

I like to describe the term as a deep interest in the work of a man, that sometimes borders on fanaticism or obsession. 
From what I gather it’s not sexual? I’m putting a question mark there because I’m still not certain. 
In any event, the guy who wrote this article has more than one man crush and here’s just one a few he mentioned.
Jonathan Franzen
The Corrections and Freedom are arguably the two best novels written so far this century.  He has a pair of signature glasses that were once stolen and offered back for a ransom fee.  I love his glasses so much that when I went to get a new pair, I found the closest model to “The Franzen.” He is the only novelist to appear on the cover of Time in the 21st century, and he was best friends with David Foster Wallace.  His words flow seamlessly together creating a symphony in the form of beautifully crafted prose. Plus he blocks off his Internet connection when he writes. Mr. Franzen means business and I envy that. His essays are fantastic as well. I could go on and on about my crush on Franzen, but I have to leave some space for my other man crushes.

Correct me if I’m wrong, but that doesn’t sound like a crush to me. It sounds more like a fascination, or a huge admiration and respect for Franzen. I get that part of it. I feel that way about Franzen, too. But in my “man crush” fantasy about Franzen his pants are definitely coming down and he’s going to wind up dropping those bird watching binoculars in the wildflowers.

You can read the rest here. Unfortunately, I still don’t get what a “man crush” actually is. Maybe it’s the word crush that’s throwing me off.

I just can’t help this feeling that these straight guys with man crushes aren’t telling the complete truth. But again, I could be wrong about that.

Male Full Frontal Nudity in Fifty Shades Movie

The guy who finally landed the lead part in the film adaptation of the mega book, Fifty Shades of Grey, is talking about whether or not there will be full frontal male nudity in the film. For those who haven’t been following this saga, his name is Jamie Dornan, and I think he looks about as much like Christian as my mailman. However, he might do a fantastic job and I hate to speculate right now. I hope his performance is a little better than this interview, though.

Despite the highly sexual content in the movie, the 32-year-old actor admitted to The Guardian that he will NOT be showing his “todger” on screen. That’s right, Dornan will not have any full frontal scenes in the film. “You want to appeal to as wide an audience as possible without grossing them out,” he defended the decision. “You don’t want to make something gratuitous, and ugly, and graphic. There were contracts in place that said that viewers wouldn’t be seeing my …todger.”

Well. It doesn’t sound as if Mr. Dornan read the books. And why would anyone assume that because there’s a male full frontal nude scene in a film it would be considered gratuitous, graphic, and ugly…or that people would be grossed out. Does he think people will be running to the theater because they liked the way FS was so well written? The penis is not the entire point in an erotic romance of any kind, but the penis usually plays a significant role and I just don’t see why it should be looked upon as ugly.

I’m curious to see if they show any full frontal female nudity in the film. We all know how Hollywood puts a spin on THAT sexist double standard where they objectify women but not men. There you go, Rose McGowan, I just commented about women and offered my support the way I always do.

The rest of this is here. I left a comment, and mine was tame compared to the others. I think they should keep Dornan hidden from the press until after this film’s released. Clearly, #interviewfail.

Penis Stories Randal Kleiser

For many years, 68 year old director Randal Kleiser has been creating male sex symbols in that old time Hollywood way. This article is really an interview with Kleiser, but the beginning lists a few of the famous male sex symbols he’s created, from Christopher Atkins to John Travolta. I know it’s hard to imagine John Travolta as a sex symbol now, but when I was a kid I actually remember him being hot. 

Readers should be glad I’m condensing this one, because it’s so hard to get to the point of the article you almost want to give up. And even when you get to the point, you wonder why you bothered. In short, Kleiser wrote a stage play called The Penis Chronicles, and here are a few things (very few things) he had to say about it.

What’s the show about specifically?

The subtitle is “Every Man’s Journey.” There’s a song for the play that opens and closes it and the lyrics are “every man’s journey begins with a cry” and then “every man’s journey ends with a sigh,” which is when you die. We have characters ranging from a 16-year-old who’s being teased in the showers at the gym because he hasn’t gone through puberty and has a tiny dick and is using a penis pump to try to grow up. There’s a farm boy alone on the farm coming out and revealing how hard it is. There’s a guy who got HIV from his girlfriend and a male prostitute who was a Wall Street banker who decided it was more interesting to do that work. There’s a drag queen who uses money from tricks to send her little brother to summer camp. There’s just all kinds of drama and interesting stuff. There’s a thread running through it. They’re all connected in some way.
You can read the rest here, which is basically a long version of Kleiser’s previous credits. I’m not so sure about this one. They lost me with the male sex worker who left his job on Wall Street because he found that blowing other guys for money was more interesting. Seriously? Maybe it’s alternate universe?

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Orson Scott Card Anti-Gay; Gay Friendly Alabama

Orson Scott Card Anti-Gay

I’ve posted about anti-gay author, Orson Scott Card, a few times. And now he’s claiming that he’s been attacked, savagely, in an unfair way. I’m not going to get into Card’s past anti-gay record because it would be too long and involved for a short post. But if you do a simple search with his name you’ll be amazed at what you find.

His novels, which I’ve never read and can’t comment on, are being turned into a film and many have been calling for a boycott of the film. Here’s how Card views it:

‘I’ve had no criticism. I’ve had savage, lying, deceptive personal attacks, but no actual criticism because they’ve never addressed any of my actual ideas,’ Card told Deseret News.

I’m honestly not certain what that statement means. It’s a pragmatic issue for me. As a gay man I have no interest in debating my life with Card or anyone else, or offering him criticism. It’s not up for debate, and not with Mr. Card, a fiction writer. I have no interest in debating equal rights with him either. And how I live my life is not up for debate with Card or anyone else who is anti-gay. I don’t care what his ideas are. I don’t care what he believes. But more important, I don’t have to care what his ideas are or how he thinks. I’m not the one trying to discriminate against Card or how he lives his life. And at this point in my life, after being with the same man for over twenty-one years and still not able to get legally married in Pennsylvania, I don’t feel the need or have the inclination to offer Card anything more than total complete dismissal.

So if he expects critical responses he’d better stop waiting. Because some things just aren’t up for debate anymore. I. Want. Equal. Rights. I’m tired of talking about them.

The natural response to anything anti-gay, or to any author or public figure who is stupid enough to discuss controversial topics in public, is to not support their work if you don’t agree with them.

Check out the full article with the link above. It gets better, and the comment thread is interesting.

Gay Friendly Alabama

One huge misconception I’ve always found about the US is that everyone (including Americans) tends to classify certain parts of the US in set ways. It’s like everything between NY and LA is backward, and only those who live in certain places are gay friendly. Of course I’ve exaggerated that to a certain extent. But the geographic stereotypes do exist, and the south usually gets slammed the worst. And when people think of places like Alabama and Mississippi they tend to think homophobia…or at least not as accepting. This article proves that theory dead wrong:

The actors held hands walking down city streets, kissed in a photo booth at a carnival and acted out a marriage proposal in the middle of a crowded waffle house in both states.

 Instead of being met with jeers or abuse, the proposals received scattered applause and not a single derogatory remark.

The sad fact is that you can find homophobia and hate anywhere in the world, from New York City to Southern California. But it looks like things are, indeed, getting better. I’m old enough to remember when it was shocking to see two men holding hands and walking down the streets of Manhattan.
 

Big Jeff Schroeder – A Graceful Exit?

If you don’t follow the game, Big Brother, you won’t care about this post. But I’ve been following the game since the first season and the one thing I’ve always admired is the way all the contestants lose with grace and dignity. They work hard to stay in the house. They fight for the grand prize, a half million dollars. And when they get evicted you can almost feel their pain. But they all know it’s only a game. And when it’s time to leave, they leave with smiles.

But this time, when Big Jeff Schroeder was evicted, grace under pressure clearly wasn’t something that concerned him. And for those who don’t know, if you watch this video, his eviction was more than valid. It had reached a point where Big Jeff thought he was king of the house (maybe the world), and a few smart players who’d been considered underdogs in the house weren’t going to let him get away with it. They were tired of being intimidated by him. And they were not going to hand him a half million dollar check for being a bully. So they outsmarted him, which didn’t take much, and got him out just in time.

In case you didn’t hear Big-Jeff-the-football-player’s homophobic rants about how wrong it would be to have positive gay characters in kid’s books, here’s a link to a previous post I wrote, where he’s trashing this very topic. And it wasn’t the first time he did this either. The only thing I can’t understand is why any network in Hollywood would have him back a second time. If he’d ranted about race this way, he’d have gone into oblivion. But it doesn’t seem to matter when he rants about gays.

Interesting. But none of that matters, because Karma got good old Big Jeffie this time in spite of the network’s bad decision. Karma, and a few smart women players did him in.

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