Category: homophobia

Bachelorette Contestants Homophobic? Ian Reisner and Ted Cruz; Lesbian Catfishing Married Gay Man

Bachelorette Contestants Homophobic?

I’ve never seen this show, or The Bachelor. I’m not a huge fan of reality TV because it’s all staged and there’s very little reality associated with it…unless the reality is a homophobic content. You know the kind of comments that people make like, “That’s so Gay.” Evidently, because they think gay is so funny…or whatever.  

Cue the disappointment. And the outrage.

It turns out Clint Arlis and JJ Lane, the two straight Bachelorette contestants who claimed they’d fallen in love with each other while taping the ABC reality show, were only “doing it for the cameras” and that “nothing gay ever happened.”

You can read more here. On Twitter there’s a hashtag that I love…#thatssostraight. People on Twitter have taken to using it whenever they see this kind of passive aggressive homophobia. I’ve done it more than a few times because I see this kind of thing almost two or three times every single day.

Ian Reisner and Ted Cruz

Now they’ve found out that the wealthy gay hotelier, Ian Reisner, donated money to Ted Cruz. For some reason, it feels as if Reisner is being targeted.

Afterwards, Reisner claimed the dinner wasn’t a fundraiser and that he didn’t give Cruz any money, telling New York magazine: “There were no checks given. It was nothing like that.”

Well, it turns out that was a bunch of Bologna with a capital B.

The New York Times has just learned that Reisner wrote a personal check to Mr. Cruz’s 2016 presidential campaign in the amount of $2,700, the maximum allowed by law, right around the time the dinner took place.

The rest is here, with the entire history of this Ian Reisner situation. I would never donate money to Ted Cruz, however, I’m not all that fond of the way some are taking such pleasure in all this. Could it be that the liberal gay press is targeting a gay conservative? I don’t know enough about it to answer that question, but I have seen that done before. 

I have a feeling Reisner will respond to this and I’ll be posting about it yet again before next week is over.

Lesbian Catfishing Married Gay Man

I don’t know what to make of this one either. A young guy named David Messerschmitt who is married to a woman hooked up with someone through a Craigslist ad, thinking it was a hot gay man. Unfortunately, Messerschmitt found out he’d been catfished by two young gay women when he met them at a Washington D. C. hotel.

Gallmon entered Messerschmitt’s room at the unnamed hotel and attempted to rob him. We’d say “that’s when things went wrong,” but this whole mess was clearly wrong from the very beginning.
The young woman claims that Messerschmitt trapped her in the room, triggering a previous trauma from a past assault.

At least that’s the argument she’s using in court to try and explain how she came to stab Messerschmitt seven times in the abdomen, groin and heart, killing him.

She made it out of the room with $40 cash and Messerschmitt’s metro card, and walked hand-in-hand with Johnson to a bus stop. Housekeeping found Messerschmitt’s body the next day, his arms bound in rainbow-colored zip ties.

The rest is here. I know I say this all the time, but I think it shows how many more gay people there are out there posing as straight. And it goes without saying how dangerous online hook ups can be.

The Rainbow Detective Agency: On Fleek

Transgender Convict Denied Hormones; Gay Teen Big High School Struggles; Your Porn Searches Aren’t Private

Transgender Convict Denied Hormones

A transgender convict who was sentenced to serve time in a Georgia prison was allegedly raped seven times while in prison. She’s also been kept with male prisoners and they’ve denied hormone therapy to her.

Keep in mind this is a convict who was charged with burglary and “other punishable offenses.”

‘During intake, I kept saying: “Hello? I’m trans? I’m a woman?”’. Diamond told the New York Times.
‘But to them I was gay. I was what they called a “sissy.” 

So finally I was like: “O.K., I’m a sissy. Do you have a place where sissies can go and be O.K.?”

They did not and as a result Diamond says she has been raped at least seven times during her sentence to date.

The DOJ got involved in a lawsuit against the Georgia Department of corrections and it gets more complicated.

‘By taking action in this case, the Justice Department is reminding departments of corrections that prison officials have the obligation to assess and treat gender dysphoria just as they would any other medical or mental health condition,’ Acting Assistant Attorney General Vanita Gupta of the Civil Rights Division said in a statement on Friday.

While I do believe she shouldn’t be kept with the male inmates because she clearly identifies as a woman, I’ve always struggled with other aspects of cases like this. If she hadn’t burglarized (and committed those other offenses) and she hadn’t done anything illegal she wouldn’t be in prison in the first place. Most people in the world go through their entire lives without being convicted of burglary. But then you can’t deny insulin to a diabetic in prison either. That would be morally wrong. 

You can read the rest here. 

Gay Teen Big High School Struggles

This is one of those links where they add the comments to images. I don’t really like them because they tend to make light of the more serious situations, and I think this is a serious situation.

There is no sum of money great enough to convince us to relive our high school years (time travel restraints aside).

Though many high school-era memories are tinted with a rosy glow of nostalgia, the reality is it’s a turbulent time of self-discovery, confusion and learning from mistakes.

For LGBT teens, those qualities are amplified by social stigma, constant ‘covering,’ and in many cases homophobic family and peers.

I have always believed high school is the most difficult time for anyone who is LGBT. This is interesting because it doesn’t seem to have gotten much better since I was in high school. Other than the fact that more LGBT teens are coming out sooner, they are still dealing with those rotten little foul-mouthed straight kids who need a good kick in the ass.

Here’s one:

Being picked on for being gay is not fun. Nobody really knew until I came out and I’m still in high school. Maybe I should have stayed in the closet.

Nope. It doesn’t sound as if much has changed.  The rest are here.

Your Porn Searches Aren’t Private

I think we all understand the horrible tracking and the loss of privacy on the Internet. The other day I did a simple search for shoes and now all I’m seeing are shoe ads all over my facebook and other accounts. The only way to get rid of them is to search for something else, and to make sure I really like it because it’s going to be following me all over the Internet for weeks.

In any event, they are now saying this could happen with porn searches.

“In 2014 a set of celebrities had naked photos released to the public, a deeply disturbing event that was fantastically labeled ‘the fappening.’ Many people brushed off the episode – oh well, I’m not a celebrity,” he continues. “But I think the next big internet privacy crisis could expose the private and potentially embarrassing personal data of regular people to their neighbors…”

Considering that many LGBT people still live in areas where their sexual identity is a crime, the unmasking of adult searches could pose a threat that far exceeds embarrassment.

However, all this could be misleading. (But I think it’s a concern anyway.)

To be fair, in a statement to Vice, adult mega-site Pornhub called Thomas’ conclusions “not only completely false, but also dangerously misleading,” adding that, “Pornhub’s raw server logs contain only the IP and the user agent for a very limited time, never a browser footprint.”

Still, that’s just one response form one company, and Vice notes that 88 percent of the top 500 porn sites have tracking elements installed.

It’s a questionable issue and I see a lot more coming about this.

You can read the rest here.  

The Way We ALMOST Were

A Gay Parody  


Bullies Who Turned Gay; Rage Over Dick Pic; Jamie Dornan’s Nude Photos

Bullies Who Turned Gay

Here’s an article about people who were homophobic bullies before they realized they were gay. It also discusses how different things were for previous generations of LGBT people, and how differently we grew up from the generation of teens we’re seeing right now.

Here’s one person’s reply:

I mean, I was a young kid, so growing up around other kids in a conservative area (in spite of my pretty liberal parents) I called things I didn’t like “gay,” and people I didn’t like “fags.” I knew being gay meant you were girly and prissy and feminine and deserved to be made fun of.

I didn’t really understand what I was saying, it’s just sort of something you grow up being told about, and you’re told that it’s bad and people who are gay all act a certain way, you know, the typical shit with teenage boys.

You can read the rest here. Frankly, and this might be thanks to my parents, I never did this bullying growing up and I never used homophobic words like that. But I knew people who did.

Rage Over Dick Pic

This is about as Facebook as it gets. A drunk pregnant woman allegedly flew into a rage when she saw her husband looking at a big penis on the computer. The drunk accused him of being gay, punched him, bit him, and threatened him with a knife.

The picture was sent to Scherzo as a joke by a friend of his who happened to be gay. The two men were chatting online. When Hamer saw the photo, prosectors say she “went mad.”

“She started calling him gay and wouldn’t let it go, although he told her it was just a joke,” prosecuting attorney Enza Geldard told a Pennines court this week.

Hamer’s lawyer, Kamran Yousaf, said his client’s behavior was fueled by alcohol and, possibly, pregnancy hormones.

“Clearly, she was aggrieved when she saw that image on the computer and confronted him,” Yousaf said. “She acted wrongly. She shouldn’t have done what she did.”

You can read the rest here. All I’m saying on this topic is that you haven’t seen anything until you’ve seen a jealous berserk woman who thinks a gay man might be stealing her husband away. Or even her boyfriend. It’s absolutely vicious and these women react aggressively. I know this because it’s happened to me.

Jamie Dornan’s Nude Photos

In case you don’t know, Jamie Dornan was the lead in the film adaptation of Fifty Shades of Grey. The film that critics and people with good taste love to hate pushed him into the spotlight almost overnight and now nude photos of him when he was younger have surfaced.

 Before he was pretending to be a dom top or a serial killer or a sheriff in a magical land, the rather gorgeous Jamie Dornan was doing what all fresh-faced 21-year-olds dreamed of in the early 2000’s — gracing the pages of the pansexual Abercrombie and Fitch quarterly catalog.

I wouldn’t get too excited, though. The nude photos of him are as thrilling as the sex scenes in Fifty Shades of Grey and if you’re looking for something interesting you’re better off going to Twitter for male nudes. 

You can see them here.   

Meadows Are Not Forever 

I Guess I’m a Typical Fag: Bonus Homophobia

I Guess I’m a Typical Fag: Bonus Homophobia

Update: I don’t usually see things like this happen, but I figured I would update this post for that reason. Since all this went down, I’ve spoken to the author and we’ve worked things out. He e-mailed me, we both talked about it, and we both realized we said a few things we didn’t mean. Sometimes in life there really is HEA. 

I’ve posted about how I often feel the discrimination and homophobia in many ways. But I’ve never actually given an example, first hand, and I’d like to do that now to show how it still is happening, and this time it came from another author.

On Monday I received a spam e-mail from one of those aggressive self-published authors who has a book out who actually uses offensive ableist language in his own bio on Amazon. Here’s a quote: who drove him into becoming the crazy person he is today. But it wasn’t his ableist language that bothered me. A lot of people don’t know what ableist language is and I understand that. It was the spam e-mail he sent. Here’s the exact e-mail exchange, including his gay-hate slur, verbatim.

Me:  Please stop spamming me and take me off this list. This is NOT going to help sell your book 🙂  Thank you. 

Him:  You are so removed, fool!!!

Me: Drop dead. 


And there you are. I’m saving this e-mail exchange, like I do everything else. My first reply was polite, considering I thought I was helping him out by showing him that spamming people doesn’t work. I really did add the little smiley face to show I wasn’t trying to be snarky. My second reply wasn’t as nice. I’ll admit that, but I’m not fond of being called a fool either. But his homophobic hate reply wasn’t necessary and I wanted to show how I actually do face this kind of thing daily. I think most gay people do, even those of us who write about homophobia and try to point it out all the time. There were a million things he could have called me, but he chose the word “fag” based on my e-signature that states I’m an LGBT author. 

The author’s books are on Amazon, and he’s clearly not writing LGBT content or anything related to mm romance. But I’m not adding names or links because frankly I don’t feel safe with people like this. If they will say homophobic things like that I don’t like to think about what they are capable of actually doing. The hate goes much deeper than most people realize. And, I’d rather not promote the loser and help give him hits on his Amazon page.

Wendy Williams Slams Jenner; Chris Lowell on Gay Stereotyping; Michael Sam’s Sexuality a Choice?

Wendy Williams Slams Jenner

I talk about this kind of thing happening all the time and I just never seems to go away. I’m not even getting into details about Bruce Jenner because I don’t really care about them. What I’m talking about now is on a broader level, with respect to how we look at being LGBT and how people like Wendy Williams continue to promote shame. Am I being too PC? I don’t care. I want them to be just as afraid to say the wrong thing about gays as they are about any other minority in the US. I think we’ve earned that. 

Wendy Williams is now speaking out about comments she made about Jenner. You can read that here. This is a direct quote.

“I don’t know what Bruce is going through but I’m happy for him because there’s got to be nothing worse in a person’s life then to not be able to live in their own truth,” she told HuffPost Live. “Whether you’re gay, whether you’re transgender — whatever. Whatever it is.”

That sounds wonderful. No problem. It looks great to me. Until you read this…what she said last 

“Thank God he waited for his kids to grow up before making this transition or whatever it is he’s going through. Can you imagine how awful it would be for those kids if he showed up with a blowout, a shaved Adam’s apple, pink nail polish and smoking a cigarette at a PTA meeting? Could you imagine?”

And, this is another recent quote from Williams, from the first link above:

“People hear what they want to hear, not what was actually said,” she remarked. “Listen, I’m a friend to a lot of communities. You know, I call things as I see them and that’s that.”

Okay. If you go back up and reread the first comment Williams made a week ago I’d like to know how anyone in the LGBT community with self-respect is supposed to interpret that. People aren’t stupid either. And Wendy Williams isn’t talented enough, clever enough, or quick enough to pull off that kind of badass comedy. She’s no Joan Rivers. What she said, no matter how you interpret it, only promotes more shame for the entire LGBT community.

Chris Lowell on Gay Stereotyping

Evidently, more people are becoming aware of how gay characters are portrayed in films. Or at least they are becoming more sensitive to the fact that it’s okay to just add gay characters in a normal way, without making a big deal out of it. This isn’t about labels. I hate when people complain about labels because it implies there’s something wrong with being gay. This is about just putting gay characters in and not talking too much about it. Here’s a statement director Chris Lowell recently made about his gay characters in “Beside Still Waters.” (They spelled Lowell’s name wrong in the article, a shame because everyone else who linked to it did the same. I have a rule. You can call me anything you want; just don’t spell my name wrong. Come on Huff Po, with all of Ariana’s money you can do better than this.)  

“There’s kind of this void in pop culture [in terms of how] homosexuality is portrayed,” Powell said of the character of Tom (played by Beck Bennett). “I was so sick and tired of seeing foppish, over-the-top, broad characters that were…becoming sort of the industry standard of what a gay man or a gay woman looked like.”

The director chose not to include “gay” in the description of the character in the initial script, because he “didn’t want actors coming in and auditioning and doing their version of ‘gay.’ It shouldn’t matter.”

I think this is the trend we’re going to be seeing more of in the future, especially when “gay fiction” becomes even more of a niche market, m/m romance peters out like chick lit did, and gay characters are everywhere in mainstream fiction. I hope so anyway. At least that’s the transition many gay male authors I know are moving toward now. You can read the rest here, where there’s a video clip of “Beside Still Waters.” It looks pretty good.

Michael Sam’s Sexuality a Choice?

We definitely still have a long, long way to go. We’re living in wonderful times with respect to equality, but we’re still being examined and exploited like lab rats to create “artful” fiction, and people still think that being gay is a choice.

Deion Sanders from the NFL was recently quoted saying this about Michael Sam:

“I’m not saying I condone it, but I don’t condemn it,” the Pro Football Hall of Famer said of Sam, who became the first openly gay player to be drafted by the NFL earlier this year. Noting that he’d personally reached out to Sam, he added, “I don’t love what he do, but I love him as a man. And I just wanted him to understand the burden and the weight he’s carrying.” 

When King asked Sanders if he thought Sam’s sexuality could be a choice, the retired NFL player noted, “It could be.”

Explaining further, he added, “The God I know don’t make mistakes.” 

The rest is here, with more examples of Sanders’ ignorance on being gay. As I said, there’s still a lot to work on. But in this case, unlike Wendy Williams above, I don’t think the intent is vicious. It’s fueled by years of misconception.

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Rose McGowan Slams Gay Men; WTF Are Man Crushes;Male Full Frontal Nudity in Fifty Shades Movie; Penis Stories Randal Keiser

Rose McGowan Slams Gay Men

I’m going to try to write this part of the post without getting too angry…even though that’s how I felt when I read about what Rose McGowan said about gay men…again. And while I think her comments are disingenuous, I can’t fault her for being dumb. She clearly knows little about gay men, at least if this is what she thinks. Note: Mr. 1980’s, Brett Easton Ellis, does not identify as gay, as suggested in the quote below. We’re not sure what he is, because he’s, you know, such a rare creative and you-neeeek chucklefuck.

The actress recently sounded off during a conversation with gay author Brett Easton Ellis in his weekly podcast as the two were discussing the boycott the Brunei-owned Dorchester Hotel collection

Owned by the Sultan of Brunei, the Dorchester Collection came under fire shortly after the Sultan implemented a change to the country’s penal code that was scheduled to come into effect on April 22, 2014 and could make homosexuality punishable by stoning to death.

Ellis kicked off the conversation by claiming the boycott only harmed “the people who simply work at the hotel” and was based on “illusionary and tenuous” reports about the Sharia law. He also categorized the boycott as a “form of narcissistic, self-victimisation, gay insanity.”

McGowan added that those who boycotted were “delusional idiots” and criticized them for failing to campaign against the abuse of women in Arab states as well.

“Gay men are as misogynistic as straight men, if not more so,” she said. “I have an indictment of the gay community right now, I’m actually really upset with them.”

I posted about The Beverly Hills Hotel and McGowan’s party last summer, when she was slamming gay men for standing up for something in which they believed. You can read that here. In full disclosure, I don’t believe boycotts work either. As a general rule I don’t waste my time with them. However, I do support those who believe they work because I think that’s the right thing to do. Plain and simple.

But what really bothers me the most is that Easton and McGowan make assumptions about all gay men that are by no means accurate. First, I don’t know one gay man who doesn’t support women. I’m sure there are some out there, but the ones I know all care. Second, Rose McGowan seems to believe that all gay men have the privilege she has to be activists and to fight for equal rights. It’s a huge misconception many who know nothing about gays make all the time. The truth is that the wonderful, dedicated gay activists you see all the time are only a small segment of the gay community. The majority still can’t afford to come out and fight this way because there are still too many obstacles and shames associated with being gay. Third, Rose McGowan is a woman of privilege who cannot and will never understand what any gay man has ever gone through…from birth. The same way I can never understand what women have gone through. Fourth, gay men are still trying to get women to stop exploiting them and treating them as if they are science experiments.

I could continue with this, but I don’t think it’s worth my time. Frankly, I still think McGowan is an idiot and I think her cohort, Easton, would do anything to get some free publicity for that tired pod cast he’s doing online. But they are good examples of a different kind of homophobia.

You can read more here. This link has more links. I tweeted a few things to McGowan but I’m sure it fell on deaf ears. More than a few gay men replied to her and she said nothing of any significance. Her apology was a waste of time, too.

WTF Are Man Crushes

I have to admit that I’ve never really understood the term “man crush.” When I try to relate to it by thinking about whether or not I’ve ever had a “woman crush” I come up with nothing. It’s a complete blank…even though I admire and respect many women. Earlier this week I spotted a guy on Twitter tweet something to a male celebrity C-lister that I follow and I was curious so I went to this guy’s home page and read his Twitter bio. This is what it said:

Current High School Baseball Player & Future Pro. I love girls, pizza & baseball. I’m confident enough in my sexuality to admit my Man crush is…XXXOOO
Clearly, there’s no need for me to mention names and I don’t want to embarrass anyone. That’s not the point. The point is that it’s hard for some of us to understand what a man crush is. The guys loves girls but he’s crushing on a guy. ???? I once read a blog post by a straight male literary agent who isn’t blogging anymore and that literary agent claimed he had a man crush on a famous male chef who has his own TV show. It didn’t get it then, and still don’t get it now. But I think this article at least explains it better than most I’ve seen.

I like to describe the term as a deep interest in the work of a man, that sometimes borders on fanaticism or obsession. 
From what I gather it’s not sexual? I’m putting a question mark there because I’m still not certain. 
In any event, the guy who wrote this article has more than one man crush and here’s just one a few he mentioned.
Jonathan Franzen
The Corrections and Freedom are arguably the two best novels written so far this century.  He has a pair of signature glasses that were once stolen and offered back for a ransom fee.  I love his glasses so much that when I went to get a new pair, I found the closest model to “The Franzen.” He is the only novelist to appear on the cover of Time in the 21st century, and he was best friends with David Foster Wallace.  His words flow seamlessly together creating a symphony in the form of beautifully crafted prose. Plus he blocks off his Internet connection when he writes. Mr. Franzen means business and I envy that. His essays are fantastic as well. I could go on and on about my crush on Franzen, but I have to leave some space for my other man crushes.

Correct me if I’m wrong, but that doesn’t sound like a crush to me. It sounds more like a fascination, or a huge admiration and respect for Franzen. I get that part of it. I feel that way about Franzen, too. But in my “man crush” fantasy about Franzen his pants are definitely coming down and he’s going to wind up dropping those bird watching binoculars in the wildflowers.

You can read the rest here. Unfortunately, I still don’t get what a “man crush” actually is. Maybe it’s the word crush that’s throwing me off.

I just can’t help this feeling that these straight guys with man crushes aren’t telling the complete truth. But again, I could be wrong about that.

Male Full Frontal Nudity in Fifty Shades Movie

The guy who finally landed the lead part in the film adaptation of the mega book, Fifty Shades of Grey, is talking about whether or not there will be full frontal male nudity in the film. For those who haven’t been following this saga, his name is Jamie Dornan, and I think he looks about as much like Christian as my mailman. However, he might do a fantastic job and I hate to speculate right now. I hope his performance is a little better than this interview, though.

Despite the highly sexual content in the movie, the 32-year-old actor admitted to The Guardian that he will NOT be showing his “todger” on screen. That’s right, Dornan will not have any full frontal scenes in the film. “You want to appeal to as wide an audience as possible without grossing them out,” he defended the decision. “You don’t want to make something gratuitous, and ugly, and graphic. There were contracts in place that said that viewers wouldn’t be seeing my …todger.”

Well. It doesn’t sound as if Mr. Dornan read the books. And why would anyone assume that because there’s a male full frontal nude scene in a film it would be considered gratuitous, graphic, and ugly…or that people would be grossed out. Does he think people will be running to the theater because they liked the way FS was so well written? The penis is not the entire point in an erotic romance of any kind, but the penis usually plays a significant role and I just don’t see why it should be looked upon as ugly.

I’m curious to see if they show any full frontal female nudity in the film. We all know how Hollywood puts a spin on THAT sexist double standard where they objectify women but not men. There you go, Rose McGowan, I just commented about women and offered my support the way I always do.

The rest of this is here. I left a comment, and mine was tame compared to the others. I think they should keep Dornan hidden from the press until after this film’s released. Clearly, #interviewfail.

Penis Stories Randal Kleiser

For many years, 68 year old director Randal Kleiser has been creating male sex symbols in that old time Hollywood way. This article is really an interview with Kleiser, but the beginning lists a few of the famous male sex symbols he’s created, from Christopher Atkins to John Travolta. I know it’s hard to imagine John Travolta as a sex symbol now, but when I was a kid I actually remember him being hot. 

Readers should be glad I’m condensing this one, because it’s so hard to get to the point of the article you almost want to give up. And even when you get to the point, you wonder why you bothered. In short, Kleiser wrote a stage play called The Penis Chronicles, and here are a few things (very few things) he had to say about it.

What’s the show about specifically?

The subtitle is “Every Man’s Journey.” There’s a song for the play that opens and closes it and the lyrics are “every man’s journey begins with a cry” and then “every man’s journey ends with a sigh,” which is when you die. We have characters ranging from a 16-year-old who’s being teased in the showers at the gym because he hasn’t gone through puberty and has a tiny dick and is using a penis pump to try to grow up. There’s a farm boy alone on the farm coming out and revealing how hard it is. There’s a guy who got HIV from his girlfriend and a male prostitute who was a Wall Street banker who decided it was more interesting to do that work. There’s a drag queen who uses money from tricks to send her little brother to summer camp. There’s just all kinds of drama and interesting stuff. There’s a thread running through it. They’re all connected in some way.
You can read the rest here, which is basically a long version of Kleiser’s previous credits. I’m not so sure about this one. They lost me with the male sex worker who left his job on Wall Street because he found that blowing other guys for money was more interesting. Seriously? Maybe it’s alternate universe?

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Liam Payne Fake Gay Photos; SNL Going Gay for Pay; How To Tell A Gay Top or Bottom; George Burgess Waxed Balls For Cancer

Liam Payne Fake Gay Photos

One Direction’s Liam Payne is denying the gay nude photos of him recently leaked are real. Evidently, someone photoshopped him with another guy standing in the background. I haven’t seen the photos and I don’t even care. I believe him and that’s all that matters. I don’t think he’s gay either.

But here’s where it gets interesting. Payne responded to the leaked fake photos with this:

He posted: “Wow as if people think that weird photo going around is actually me lol think id rather tweet a full frontal than have people look at that[sic].”
When challenged about this as homophobic comment, he replied this way:
I’m 100% not homophobic. But I’m also 100% not gay so when somebody says I am I’m gunna say I’m not which does not make me a homophobe.
See there’s where he lost me. Why should it matter so much to him? Just say they aren’t real. People who aren’t homophobes don’t have to say they aren’t homophobes. There are plenty of other ways to respond and no one will call you a homophobe. This goes for everyone. By stating that you would rather do anything than be in a gay photo like that, and by denying you’re not gay with such strong emphasis, only creates the impression there’s something wrong with being gay. If the fake photo had been leaked with Payne standing with a woman in the background he would have just laughed it off and stated his case.
I don’t write these posts for people like Payne. I don’t really care what he thinks. I write them for other gay men who live with shame and who don’t even realize the homophobia in Payne’s comment. At a glance, it’s hard to catch, but the subconscious misses nothing. And I think it’s important to be aware of this, all the time.
You can read the rest here. There really needs to be more awareness about what’s homophobic and what’s not. At least we know deep down how these people really feel. Because you can’t just say you support gays because that’s the thing to do. You have to really believe there’s nothing inherently wrong with being gay, too.

SNL Going Gay For Pay

During the 40th season premiere of Saturday Night Live, an interesting question was discussed by the “Resident Young Person.”

How much money would you go down on a guy for?

Davidson goes on to make a convincing argument about why being paid $1 million to go down on a guy ‘is a steal.’

‘I hope he starts at $1 million – I would do it for like $3,000 if I had to be honest with myself,’ Davidson says with a big toothy smile.
Here’s a link to a video of the segment. It’s worth watching.
Frankly, I see his point. I’d eat pussy for a million. And I’d kill Tony if he refused an offer like that. You can always rinse your mouth out with Epsom salts, but a million dollar offer doesn’t happen every day of the week.
How to Tell a Gay Top or Bottom
I often write these posts and laugh so hard while I’m doing them I can’t see clearly. One thing is for sure, you won’t read about fun things like this over at Barry Eisler’s blog. I love his blog, but when you go there you need Ativan. (He’s so serious all the time, and those big scary words he uses. It’s absolutely quindillacious.)  
This following link will lead you to a video where vlogger, John Bird, tells you how you can tell a gay top from a gay bottom in a nightclub.
Frankly, it’s obviously exaggerated, but about as accurate as it gets, at least as far as the gay top example goes. Gay bottoms can be a little trickier. Yes, many do what is shown in the video, however, not all are that open. Some prefer to leave a little to the imagination to help make things more interesting. In that case it usually doesn’t take more than a look or a touch to know whether or not the legs go up or remain on the floor.
George Burgess Waxed Balls For Cancer
The twin brother of Rugby player, Thomas Burgess, recently had his balls waxed for charity. In this case it’s cancer research. Anyone who does anything for cancer or cancer research is okay with me. Cancer sucks. I know that from personal experience, too.
There’s not much to quote here because the whole piece, pardon the pun, has images I can’t share legally. However, whether or not it’s SFW is questionable. I wouldn’t fire anyone for reading a link like this. It’s not porn (unless you talk to Sarah Palin), but I usually warn readers in advance.
 Tom is one of four brothers who all play Rugby for the same team, the South Sydney Rabbitohs. And they are all wickedly hot.
Yes, indeed. You’ll enjoy all the photos.
Glendora Hill: Too Hard to Handle
by Ryan Field

Publisher Purchase Link $4.99 (always cheaper at the publisher)Purchase Link to


Queerty on James Franco; Ariana Grande on Gay Bully; Blogging vs Writing Credits; Ice Bucket Hot Guys;

Queerty on James Franco

Update below on Franco and ice bucket challenge.

The other day I posted about James Franco and the topic of passive aggressive homophobia, which he seems to have mastered. I’m not commenting much here. I’m reluctantly posting about the subject this time with two links simply because I wanted to show that I’m not the only one who’s noticed this about Franco. Frankly, I’m bored with it all.

But Queerty recently commented about Franco and homophobia in this piece, which backs up my previous posts almost to the last letter. That doesn’t always happen in such an accidental way, so I guess I’m not the only one.

Franco, a heterosexual man who has previously used gay sex, plagiarized work from gay artistsstarted his own gay rumors and fueled gay rumors about his brother for the benefit of his own career, draws the line HERE.

So for those of you taking notes, James Franco pretty much just labeled his own MO as homophobic

And here’s a link to a more recent piece about Franco’s latest attempts to self-promote his new film with gay content. I didn’t know about the plagiarism allegations until now.

Because it’s only ok for James Franco to give a wink to his non-gay gayness, not anybody else, the actor is back again with some more uploads.

I haven’t decided whether or not I’m going to see Franco’s newest film, Michael. Of course by even stating that I’m helping him promote it right here on my own blog. I know that, and I know the difference. And I never once said that Franco wasn’t a clever little guy either.

Do I think Franco is a homophobe? Actually, no. I just think he’s an aging starlet looking for his last hurrah.

Ariana Grande on Gay Bully

Ariana Grande is a pop singer and her brother, Frankie, is participating in Big Brother 16 this summer. Frankie is openly gay (and adorable), but he’s been keeping his sister’s fame a secret. Frankie recently disclosed his sister’s fame and his real identity to the other houseguests in the Big Brother house and someone commented about him on Ariana’s social media with a negative gay slur. As a result, Ariana went to Frankie’s defense and buried the online troll.

She said: ‘That “homo” is the fiercest, most incredible, funniest, most intelligent, kind hearted and most LOVED person on the face of the planet!

‘he also cleaned up his game and told the truth to everybody in the house WHICH by the way, nobody else on the show has done.

‘so i don’t give a flying fuck if or when he comes home!!! he is incredible and i am SO proud!!!!

‘oh and also “that homo” gets more ass than you’ll ever get in your life. k miss thing?’

How do I know all this? Admittedly, I’ve been a huge Big Brother fan since the show began a long time ago. I like the game, the concept, and the strategy of the game. I’m a poker player and in many ways the BB game is like poker. Personally, I think Frankie ruined his hand by disclosing his sister’s fame way too soon. People don’t like being duped with fake identities these days. But I could be wrong about that. He’s one of the strongest players in the house this summer…or ever.

In any event, you can read more here.

Blogging vs Writing Credits

For those authors who are new, or new to querying, I thought I’d link to this next article. I don’t always agree with this blogger on everything, but sometimes…more often than not…she nails it, and this is something I would have overlooked as a given and never mentioned at all.

But I do think it’s important to know the difference between publishing credits and blogging/platform. Even here on this blog, where I blog for free, I never consider a single word I write as a publishing/writing credit. I think of blogging as a casual hobby and as a way to talk about things I see in pop culture, publishing, or in LGBTI news. Or, a way to promote/review sometimes. I don’t always care about grammar when I write here because I work fast. It’s also a place where I can talk about my books, which unfortunately I haven’t done often enough in the last four thousand posts.

In any event, here’s what publishing/writing credits are all about:

A writing credit is work that has been curated, edited or selected in some way.  Most work published on websites isn’t curated. You submit a post, it’s posted. That’s GOOD for your platform, but it’s not a writing credit.

You can read the rest here.

When it comes to these little things you might not think they’re important. But they are in the sense that the more you know about the publishing industry and how it works the more professional you’ll be. And even though a lot of things have changed, a lot have remained the same. Querying agents is one of them. You don’t want to screw that up, because those ridiculous trumped up stories about literary agents finding a self-pubbed author and going into “a fit of shaking excitement” in the middle of the night come few and far between. Most of the time agents take on writers through the query process, and most serious writers would prefer an agent take them on that way…instead of in a fit of shaking excitement. You want an agent for the long term, not for the next kindle bestseller.

Ice Bucket Hot Guys

I’ve seen my fair share of comments about the ice bucket challenge this summer and I’m not sure it’s all that bad. I even saw Ethel Kennedy on TV yesterday morning doing it. Someone actually dumped a bucket of ice water over the poor woman’s head and she took it in her stride. It’s all in fun, and Ethel’s always been a good sport.

In any event, the ice bucket challenge is about raising awareness and money for ALS…people living with Lou Gehrig’s Disease. And Ethel hasn’t been the only one doing it. A lot of the hottest guys on the planet have been taking part.

Here’s how it works: someone challenges you to dump a bucket of ice on your head within 24 hours and upload it to social media or else make a donation to ALS. Seems a little counterproductive since the whole idea is to avoid donating, but it’s an awareness thing so fine. Then once you complete the challenge, you nominate more people to participate.

You can read more here, and see video images of guys like Justin Timberlake taking part. You’ll be there for a while.

The only thing that makes me wonder is that I haven’t actually seen anyone dump a bucket of ice. It always looks like a bucket of water. Maybe I’m being too literal.

So far, we haven’t seen James Franco do it yet…but give him time.

Update: Did I call it or what? Everything in life should be this easy 🙂

Cage James
.99 E-BOOK By Ryan Field

James Franco’s Stunt; Travolta’s Gay Denials; Matt Bomer Plays Straight; Gay Porn Stars’ Kittens

James Franco’s Stunt

I’ve posted twice on this topic and I hope this is the last time. The only reason I’m doing it again is because I found another article at Huff Po about James Franco’s recent stunt where he jokes around about his brother and Zac Efron being a gay couple. The article is basically the same as it was everywhere else, but this time the comments left by many seem to answer a lot of the questions I had about this so-called stunt.

Here’s one that’s a bit harsh:

When two supposed straight men who act like they are dating, then all of you knuckle draggers think it’s a hoot. The rest of authentic gay men and women get called names and discriminated against, legislated against, and we become the targets of your superstitious religious nonsense. Heteros never fail to disappoint.

Here’s another that nails it in a simple way:

This is passive aggressive homophobia and he needs to be called out on it instead of patted on the head.

Here’s yet another that might be hitting the target head on:

Fools- this is how they network to help their movie sales and keep people blah blah blah, no different then all the other rubbish when it comes to Hollywood!

Of course there are also a few that didn’t see anything wrong with what Franco did. I was told Franco is a “friend” of the LGBTI community and that he didn’t mean any harm…that he’s into gay social experiments, or something like that. Well, if that’s the case, I guess we’re lab rats now.

Yesterday Franco posted photos of himself with cute kittens. And so it goes…

You can read more here.

Travolta’s Gay Denials

In another story involving more Hollywood shenanigans, the pilot,  Douglas Gotterba, who allegedly had an intimate, personal relationship with John Travolta in the 80’s is now free to tell everything he knows.

In the court documents, Gotterba says the two had a ‘personal and intimate’ relationship.

The judge ruled the former pilot has the right to sue to speak openly, saying Gotterba has no duty of confidentiality to the star.

Gotterba wants to publish a book about it all. Travolta denies the allegations.

You can read more here.

Whether this is true or not isn’t important to me. What bothers me the most about it is that there’s this hidden shame attached to being gay that shouldn’t be an issue.

Matt Bomer Plays Straight

In a far more positive piece about Hollywood, the trailer for Matt Bomer’s new film is out and he’s playing a straight role. The title of the film is Space Station 76, and Patrick Wilson is actually playing a bisexual character.

Bomer, currently filming the sixth and final season of TV’s White Collar, plays the role of Ted, a mechanic married to a woman named Misty (Marisa Coughlan).

The film is set in a 1970s-version of the future and is about a group of people and robots living on a space station. They face inner turmoil when a new assistant captain (Liv Tyler) arrives and sparks tension.

This sounds interesting. You can read more here. And, see the trailer.

Maybe there’s hope for Hollywood after all.

Gay Porn Stars’ Kittens

Here’s a link to Queerty where there’s a photo section about gay porn stars and their kittens. They are actually great photos with some of the most adorable kittens I’ve seen in a long time. I think they are safe for work, too. At least I didn’t see anything offensive there.

You can check them out here.

Of course James Franco isn’t in any of the photos with his kitties, but let’s wait and see what happens. Nothing would surprise me anymore…smile.

Small Town Romance Writer
by Ryan Field

Judge Judy on Grindr; 35 Worst Sex Acts; Instagram Homophobia? Small Town Romance Writer by Ryan Field

Judge Judy on Grindr

Judge Judith Sheindlin  recently found out what gay hook up site, Grindr, is all about through an episode of her courtroom TV show, Judge Judy.  She was in the middle of a dispute between a 47 year old man and his 23 year old “friend” when she found out they’d met on Grindr. Her comments, as always, are classic.

‘Um, we met on a, um … social website,’ Murphy explained. ‘It’s actually called Grindr. … It’s an app for your phone or your iPad. It’s a social app that tells you where homosexual males are and their proximity to where you are.’

The judge then asked: ‘Mr. Murphy, so, what you’re telling me, sir, is you went on this website in order to find someone who had the same sexual predisposition you did?’

Murphy then tried to say this with a straight face: ‘Um, no, actually, it was just to make friends.’

The always blunt judge replied: ‘If I was looking just to make friends, I wouldn’t go on a website that said it’s just for little, old Jewish ladies. I would try to expand my horizons a little bit, do you understand, Mr. Murphy?’

It gets better. Judge Judy told the older guy he should be with someone closer to his own age…”at least out of school.” Ha!! There’s usually only one reason why a 23 year old is with a 47 year old and friendship has nothing to do with it.

You can read more here. This is why I have a DVR alert for Judge Judy running twenty-four hours. The thing that always amazes me is that there are people so willing and eager to get in TV they’ll do anything, even if it involves a certain amount of public humiliation.

35 Worst Sex Acts

Here’s a harsh little piece that seems to criticize the sex acts on the TV show, Californication, starring David DuchovnyBrian Feldman calls it soft core porn.  I’m not sure why Feldman feels he is qualified to judge what porn actually is, but that’s another post. What does bother me is that we always hear from the “I hate sex crowd” but you never hear anyone say there wasn’t enough sex in a TV show, book, or film. Just the big mouth “I hate sex crowd.”

In any event:

Last night, Showtime’s Californication rode off into the sunset after seven long seasons. It should surprise nobody that a show called Californication spent much of its time contriving embarrassing sex acts for its characters to perform. What resulted was basically 84 episodes of soft-core porn masquerading as premium cable drama. Thanks, Showtime! Here are 35 of the worst sexual encounters or mishaps that David Duchovny’s Hank Moody, Evan Handler’s Charlie, and the Californication crew participated in.

Here are a few examples:

  • Hank pukes on a valuable painting while having sex with someone.
  • Charlie masturbates in his office, repeatedly and vigorously …
  • … Videos of Charlie repeatedly and vigorously masturbating in his office get him fired.
  • Charlie gets his nipple torn off by a sex toy.
  • Hank and Charlie have a threesome with a boxing trainer, during which she squirts on Charlie’s face just as both of Hank and Charlie’s significant others walk into the room.
  • There are more here. I thought the show was done well and I always like to remind people they don’t have to watch or read anything with too many sex scenes if they don’t want to. You can always knit a sweater instead…or read something by Brian Feldman. 

    Instragram Homophobia?

    This article is interesting because I’ve seen the same thing happen with other social media and I’m not sure it’s a matter of homophobia. I’m not sure it isn’t either. I just think most social media outlets seriously need to rethink their actions in the mad rush to tear people down without even giving them the benefit of the doubt. Facebook is the biggest culprit of all time. If someone posts gay content and someone else doesn’t like that gay content by the person who made the post can be reported and his or her account can be suspended. In this case, a photo of a newly married gay couple was taken down on Instagram without even sending out a take down notice…or checking the facts correctly.

    This is the kiss that sealed their wedding vows. Vows that under state and federal protection offer them 1500 rights and responsibilities. ‘@instagram we expect an apology for taking this pic down and flagging it as inappropriate.

    PLEASE REPOST PLEASE REPOST PLEASE REPOST!’ Instagram has apologized for the mistake, and restored the photo. ‘When our team processes reports from other members of the Instagram community, we occasionally make a mistake,’ an Instagram spokesperson told The Huffington Post.

     ‘In this case, we wrongly removed content and rectified the error as soon as we were notified. We apologize for any inconvenience.’

    You can read more about how all this transpired here. But I think the point of all this is that social media outlets should have a better control with regard to what is and is not considered harmful content. This photo of two married men is about as harmless as it gets. In the same respect, I have seen some images on Instagram that leave a great deal to be desired. A few are taken down, but no one rushes to do that.

    Small Town Romance Writer

    Here’s a preview of another upcoming book, Small Town Romance Writer. It’s part of the bad boy billionaire series, and this one is longer than my other books. It runs about 110,000 words, which is over twice the required word count in my contracts, but it just couldn’t be helped this time. I actually edited it down from over 150,000 words. I’ll post more tomorrow. There’s a blog hop post I’m doing for the 4th of July on my first gay experience and I’m going to tie this in somehow.