Category: gay marriage

Switzerland, Gay Marriage, Public Vote; Sharon Osborne on Rosie O’Donnell’s Daughter; Sam Smith Nominated

Switzerland, Gay Marriage, Public Vote

This article is exactly why I didn’t want gay marriage put to a public vote here in the US. I don’t want my fate decided by a segment of the public who doesn’t know how to separate religion from government. And I support religion completely. I’m not an atheist by any means. I can be very conservative on many issues, not fitting into the typical gay stereotype. I also support religious freedom as long as it doesn’t stand in the way of equal rights. 

This is happening in Switzerland.

Switzerland could become the first Western European country to block gay marriage through a referendum changing its constitution.
On 28 February 2016, Swiss citizens are called to vote in a referendum on four confederate bills; one of them, titled For Marriage and Family – against the marriage penalty, could block marriage equality.
Initiated by the Christian Democratic People’s Party of Switzerland (CVP), part of the Swiss coalition government, the civil initiative seeks to add a paragraph into the federal constitution defining marriage as being between man and woman.

I am curious to see how it turns out. According to US polls, support for same sex marriage in the US is continuing to rise. However, the LGBT+ community is still a minority, not a majority. And I don’t think it’s fair to have a public vote on the rights of a minority. In the US, this is why we have a constitution and laws protecting everyone from discrimination. It’s a system that works.  

You can check this out here.

Sharon Osborne on Rosie O’Donnell’s Daughter

The only reason I’m following up on this is because I posted about Rosie O’Donnell’s daughter disappearing and that story was extremely sketchy. Frankly, I’m not a huge Rosie fan and I can live without Osborne, too. Rosie lost me on The View years ago. I’ve always believed dirty laundry is for the hamper, not twitter.

In any event…

Sharon Osbourne is speaking out passionately in defense of Rosie O’Donnell whose daughter complained in a recent interview that O’Donnell smokes pot, has a short fuse and delegates a lot of her parental duties up to nannies.
‘It’s just one of those ugly, horrible situations – the heartbreak that Rosie must be going through,’ Osbourne said on The Talk, the daytime show on which she is a co-host. ‘These arguments, it’s horrible when they go public.’

You can read the rest here, if you care. 

Sam Smith Nominated

Now here’s a guy I love, Sam Smith. He’s hard-working, excellent at his craft, and he’s taken some of the worst punches I’ve seen in a while with complete grace. In fact, I don’t think I’ve ever seen anything negative coming from him.

Taylor Swift may have gotten the most American Music Awards nominations today with six but Sam Smith had a strong showing with three AMA nods.
The openly gay British singer-songwriter was nominated in the Artist of the Year, Favorite Album and Favorite Male Artist categories.

Well done.

You can check that out here. 

The Rainbow Detective Agency
The Wedding

Gay Marriage, Schools and Taxes; The Rainbow Flag and Hate; Hillary’s Pride Month Video

Gay Marriage, Schools, and Taxes

This is something I never realized until I read this article. Conservative religious schools in the US are worried about legalized same sex marriage for monetary reasons, not the religious reasons you hear about all the time.

The religious schools are concerned that if they continue to ban gay relationships, the Internal Revenue Service could take away their tax-exempt status as a violation of a “fundamental national public policy” under the reasoning of a 1983 Supreme Court decision that allowed the agency to revoke the tax-exempt status of schools that banned interracial relationships.

In a recent letter to congressional leaders, officials from more than 70 schools, including Catholic high schools and evangelical colleges, said that a Supreme Court ruling approving same-sex marriage would put at risk all schools “adhering to traditional religious and moral values.”

You can read the rest here. Now I’m starting to wonder what else might be challenged if SCOTUS rules in favor of same sex marriage this week.

What I still don’t get is how these religious people think their religious and moral values are going to be compromised if LGBT people get the same equal rights as everyone else in the US. It’s not as if gay men will become gay Catholic priests. THAT would be unthinkable…because you NEVER see a gay Catholic priest, said no one ever. 

The Rainbow Flag and Hate

I think this next article I’m linking to shows how some people feel about left wing gay activism. It’s about the rainbow flag, but it goes far deeper. They equate the rainbow flag with hate and other things that gay activists have been accusing them of doing for years.

Under the banner of what is dishonestly called a gay pride or gay “rights” flag, hate, fascism, and intolerance has festered for years, specifically against Christians and conservatives.  Under the auspices of a “rights and equality” symbol, Leftists have been on a rampage to take way the rights of others through bullying, lies, and online terrorism.

The list of misdeeds and victims resulting from an increasingly emboldened Big Gay Hate Machine continues to grow.
Under this banner of hate, people are outed against their will,  terrorized out of business merely for being Christian, bullied and harassed for thoughtcrimes; moreover, “hate crimes” are being manufactured to keep us divided, Christians are refused service, death threats are hurled, and Christianity is regularly smeared as hate speech.

You can read the rest here. The author also mentions he wants the confederate flag taken down, too. So I have to wonder what’s going on beneath the surface of all this.

Hillary’s Pride Month Video

This is the first time I’m seeing this. Hillary Clinton who is running for President released a video that celebrates same sex marriage.

Speaking over footage of marriage proposals or of wedding ceremonies, Clinton says: ‘Being LGBT does not make you less human. And that is why gay rights are human rights. And human rights are gay rights.’

You can watch it here. Say what you will, but she’s paying attention and she’s going down on the right side of history with this one.  You just can’t take that away from her on this issue no matter how hard you try to twist, spin and turn.

The Rainbow Detective Agency 

Box Set Series $5.99

"Days of Love" Library of Congress Event; Another Brokeback Mountain; Straight Men Caught on Grindr; Free Gay Excerpt: Meadows Are Not Forever

Days of Love Library of Congress Event

2014 will go down as an “interesting” year for me for many reasons. After 22 years of being with the same person and living as if we were married, Tony and I were finally allowed to legally wed last January…in Vermont, and by a Vermont Supreme Court Justice, Beth Robinson. To add to the romance of being in Montgomeryville Center, VT, we were also part of a Hollywood documentary, The State of Marriage. I’ve posted about all that here a few times. 

Also in 2014, Tony and I had several intense family health related issues we had to deal with. I rarely post things that private in public when they first happen. I usually do eventually, but in the beginning I think it’s important to protect certain aspects of our private lives…all of us who are online, not just me.

While Tony and I were going through all this Elisa Rolle, whom I’ve met in person, was e-mailing me about a book titled Days of Love that would focus on gay couples, gay marriage, and long term gay relationships. There was so much going on at the time with family I almost didn’t participate. However, something told me this would be a book to remember someday. From a historical POV, this book would be something people could look back and reflect upon during the days when we were still fighting for legalized same sex marriage all over the world. So I put together everything Elisa asked for, I submitted it, and went back to dealing with life.

When I saw this in my inbox today I felt a sense of gratification, and it was a surprise I hadn’t expected. 
Just in case any of you are in Washington on that date!

This talk will encompass LOC’s acquisitions of Sylvester & Orphanos Publication Archives, of Stathis’s Christopher Isherwood Collection and his photographs. And Stathis told me Days of Love, which proudly display some of those photographs, will be featured as well.

It’s a great book that I believe will be around for a long time. And to be honored this way, in a book, for everyone who participated, as well as Elisa Rolle who put it together, it is a proud humble moment, indeed.

Another Brokeback Mountain

Apparently, one Brokeback Mountain in a lifetime wasn’t enough so now there’s going to be another type of film just like BM, with a dark storyline that exploits all the most depressing aspects of gay culture. This is the blurb that was released:

The project is based upon the true story of Oregonian father-and-son Joe and Jadin Bell. Jadin, a fifteen-year-old openly gay sophomore, took his own life after being both bullied at high school and struggling for acceptance from the people closest to him. In the wake of Jadin’s suicide, Joe is plunged into a sea of remorse and regret. Attempting to work through his grief, Joe sets out on a walk across America, hoping to promote awareness about the consequences of prejudice to anyone he encounters along the way.

So far the details are sketchy. The article I’m linking to only mentions the writers and the producer of the original BM…all people coming from a place of privilege. However, the people who commented on this news made some interesting statements. It’s a gay press; I’m assuming they come from gay people.

One said:

Brokeback Mountain was absolute rubbish!

Another said this:

These films are marketed towards straight people, I’m tired of ambiguous endings, HIV and death at the end. Gay films almost never have a happy ending.

And when I posted about this on social media last night one gay male author commented about why gay fiction written by gay people is never treated as seriously as films like BM.

I have no comment at all until I know more details about it, but I’d be willing to bet there won’t be a happy ending 🙂  You can read the rest here. 

Straight Men Caught on Grindr

This is about what happens when straight men get caught on Grindr…well sort of.

Gaybriel, dressed in a flamboyant pink shirt and sunglasses, and two bikini-clad beauties teamed up to trick the guys. The ladies would go down the beach and flirt with the gents, collecting as much information about them as possible before radioing it back to Gaybriel, who was waiting up the beach. When the guys eventually passed by, he would rush over pretending to recognize them from Grindr. Hilarity (and some awkwardness) ensued.

There’s more here, with a video. For those of you who think this is in bad taste, tricking the straight guys that way. Too damn bad. Get over yourselves. When I first started going out to gay bars in college, I pulled into the parking lot of a gay club one night and there were straight frat guys standing around a guy with a blindfold over his eyes. They’d brought the guy there to trick him into going to a gay bar. These “dudes” and “bros” thought it was hilarious, a gay bar and laughing at gays. And now I think this shit is just as hilarious.
Free Gay Except: Meadows Are Not Forever

(There is a happy ending to this story, a VERY happy ending) 

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            When they called his name, Cade was one of ten people left in the room. They’d collected the information sheets at the back of the room first and those up front wound up waiting all day. It was late and Cade’s feet were killing him; he had a sharp pain in the middle of his forehead. The pain was partly caused by his mother. He’d had to call her and let her know he’d be home later than he’d expected. He felt like he’d jumped right back into high school, when he’d had to call in and let his mother know everything he was doing. But he had her car; he had to let her know where he was. He could have lived without her harping about traffic, wearing his seat belt, and not talking to strangers. He was twenty-five, he’d been on his own supporting himself in Los Angeles for seven years, and she still treated him as though he were ten years old. If he’d been under less pressure he might have enjoyed the attention. It had been a long time since anyone had cared that much about him. But after what had happened in the men’s room, all he wanted to do was get this audition over with as fast as possible.

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                 He crossed into a smaller room and sat down on a folding chair that faced a long narrow table. The two guys in saggy pants he’d seen earlier that day were sitting on the ends of the table. Anderson Randolph sat between them. They didn’t look up when Cade entered. They were huddled together, conferring about something in hushed voices. At this angle, with the light hitting Anderson’s profile from the side, Cade couldn’t help notice how attractive he was. His short brown hair was shiny and a little messy on top. His tanned skin took on a slightly bronze appeal in this light. Cade guessed he was between thirty and forty; it was hard to tell nowadays because so many gay men didn’t seem to age until the last minute. (Cade had an older friend who’d once said, “I’d know them for years and they’d look exactly the same. Then one day they’d show up at my door and they’d be old men.”)
            Anderson’s body wasn’t bulky and outrageous, but there were definite signs of muscle definition showing through his tight black V-neck shirt. Although he wasn’t the rough, athletic type that usually made Cade’s mouth water, he had an aggressive, understated masculine appeal that made Cade stop and wonder what he might be like in the sack.
            When the three of them finally looked up at Cade, they each asked him a round of basic questions almost as if this was an interview for a regular job, not an audition for a reality show. They wanted to know where he lived full time, if he’d be available for travel at a moment’s notice, and if he really was single. The guy on the right with curly brown hair said they didn’t want any fakes…guys with boyfriends who were pretending to be single just to get on to the show. He also stated that if Cade was selected they would do in-depth background checks. So if there were any surprises in Cade’s past, it was best to be honest now. 

               The guy on the left asked, “Have you ever modeled or been filmed in the nude? Have you done anything professionally in the adult entertainment industry?”
            Cade gulped. He couldn’t lie. He squared his back and said, “I’ve never modeled in the nude and I’ve never done any porn films professionally. But I do work for a web site in the valley that’s considered all male entertainment. It’s called, and I’m the production assistant.” He was surprised at how good he felt after he told them the truth. Cade didn’t have anything to hide. He didn’t count the scene he’d done with the guys because he knew his face would never be shown in public. He worked hard and did a good job for an honest day’s pay. And if they didn’t like what he did, and they judged what he did, he decided he wouldn’t want to work with them either. 

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              After he told them this, the two guys on the end leaned in toward Anderson and they whispered to each other for a few seconds. They glanced back and forth at Cade a few times; they remained expressionless.
            Then the guy on the right asked, “Have you ever actually performed for this web site?”
            Cade couldn’t lie about that either. “Once,” he said. “But no one saw my face. The only shots the camera took were rear lower body shots, no head shots. I only filled in for an actor who didn’t bother to show up for work that day. My job has always been behind the scenes, not in front of the camera. And I’ve never used my real name. In other words, if you did a search for me on the internet, you’d come up with nothing.” 

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            They started whispering again, sending him quick glances, looking him up and down. Cade sat back and exhaled. He even smiled and extended his right leg. Anderson Randolph hadn’t asked him many questions: he seemed to be sitting back and evaluating with his tongue pressed to his cheek. Evidently, Anderson didn’t remember Cade or the cupcake incident from the airport. If he had, Cade figured he would have said something right away. For the first time that day, Cade felt so relaxed he fought the urge to yawn. All that worrying about being recognized had been for nothing.

             When they stopped whispering and turned to face him, there was a knock on the door. The guy on the right said, “Come in,” and a young woman entered the room carrying a small tray of large chocolate cupcakes. There must have been a mound of rich fudge frosting on top about three inches deep, set in perfect ridged swirls to form peaks. And each one had been topped with an expensive truffle.
            Unfortunately, the young woman didn’t notice that Cade had become so relaxed he’d stretched out his right leg. And when she entered the room with the tray of chocolate cupcakes, she tripped over his right foot. She caught her balance just in time and didn’t fall down. But the cupcake tray jerked and a half dozen chocolate cupcakes went sailing across the room toward the three men at the long table. 

             The guys on the end saw them coming and ducted just in time. But Anderson Randolph had been looking down at a stack of papers on the table he he’d missed the fall. Three cupcakes landed on the floor; two upside down on the table. And one lone cupcake flew across the table and landed right between Anderson Randolph’s legs.
            The two guys started laughing.
            The young woman apologized and bent over to retrieve the ruined cupcakes on the floor.
            Cade sat up straight and held his palm to his throat as Anderson reached down between his legs and slowly lifted the upside down cupcake from his crotch. 

            Anderson held the cupcake up and stopped moving for a second. His eyebrows furrowed as if deep in thought and he tilted his head sideways. A minute later, he flung a glance in Cade’s direction. His eyes opened wide; his lips parted. He pointed at Cade and said, “You’re the cell phone guy from the airport. I knew I’d seen you before somewhere.”


By Elisa Rolle Days of Love: Celebrating LGBT History One Story at a Time (1st Edition)

By Elisa Rolle Days of Love: Celebrating LGBT History One Story at a Time (1st Edition)



I wanted to give this book a post all its own. I’ve been remiss about this post because I’ve been so busy with work and family issues for the past year. But it’s been on my mind lately because I think it’s one of those books that will start out quietly, but one day in the future be something significant from a cultural and historical POV. 


Never before in the history of gay culture have there been so many changes than in the past five years. It seems as if it all happened overnight, but of course it didn’t happen overnight. Many people worked very hard for years to help bring about these changes. And there’s still a long way to go. But this particular time in gay culture is significant because of gay marriage alone. 


Days of Love is a book that celebrates all this in a quiet way, and I don’t even think the author fully realized how important this will be in the future. These are also interesting times in publishing, not just in gay culture. This is one of the few books that someone indie published in a way I’ve never seen before. It is, indeed, indie publishing at its best. Ten years ago this may or may not have been available because authors were at the mercy of literary agents and their questionable taste. The angle is simply about love. It’s not too social or political, and the message is clear. And I think highly reflective of the times in which we are living. 


Here’s a review that says it very well. And in full disclosure, my husband, Tony, and I are in the book but I’m in no way associated with how it was written or where the money goes. 



Most Helpful Customer Reviews

This book is simply amazing. Anyone who wants to refute the slanderous accusation that gay and lesbian couples can’t achieve lasting relationships has hundreds of pages of proof right here. And the stories are nothing less than inspiring. 





Revisiting SCOTUS Ruling and Gay Marriage; Amway Boycott; Chick-Fil-a

I’m really busy with family things this week, so here’s an older post from 2012. I think it shows some of the changes we’ve been through.

There’s been a lot written about SCOTUS and gay marriage, so this is from my inbox from Freedom to Marry:

Just moments ago, the U.S. Supreme Court set the clock ticking on the important work we need to do to secure our next wave of wins in 2013.

The Court announced that it will hear a challenge to the so-called Defense of Marriage Act, the federal law that discriminates against legally married same-sex couples, and to California’s Proposition 8.

Ryan,it is urgent that we now create the climate that will embolden the Supreme Court to strike down DOMA and Prop 8 as unconstitutional. We know from the Roadmap to Victory national strategy exactly how to do that: win more states and win over more hearts and minds.
Please join us in this essential work by making a donation today:

These big steps in the Supreme Court cap a transformative year in which we paved the pathway for President Obama’s support, led the campaign to secure a freedom to marry plank in the Democratic Party platform, and won the freedom to marry at the ballot in Maine, Maryland and Washington while defeating an anti-marriage amendment in Minnesota.

We now must turn this irrefutable momentum into more wins.

Help us make 2013 – like 2012 – a year of triumph and transformation by bringing down DOMA and Prop 8. Make a donation today and make your voice heard in the Supreme Court in the most powerful way possible – with more wins.

Thanks for all you do,

Evan Wolfson
Founder and President, Freedom to Marry

I’m on the fence about boycotts, only because I’m not sure they work. But it seems to be something getting attention, so here’s an e-mail I got from Fred Karger about Jane Lynch and the Amway Boycott:

I hope you can see that. Here’s more:

The Amway Boycott covers all holdings of the DeVos family and are listed on: They include all Amway divisions, the Orlando Magic NBA team, all 26 Fox Automotive Group Dealerships, MVP and RDV Health Clubs and all the hotels owned by the DeVos family including the Amway Grand Plaza, J W Marriott and the Marriott Courtyard all in in Grand Rapids, Michigan.

Jane Lynch and 3 Elected Officials Say “Boycott Amway”

Actress and Out Magazine “Entertainer of the Year” Jane Lynch endorsed the Amway Boycott recently. She is joined this week by South Dakota’s first openly gay elected official State Representative Joshua Boschee and Chapel Hill, North Carolina Mayor Mark Kleinschmidt and City Council Member Lee Storrow. All three signed Boycott Amway postcards addressed to Amway owner Doug DeVos.

The postcard campaign launched in September has resulted in a deluge of the bright yellow cards mailed in to DeVos, according to Amway Boycott founder and Rights Equal Rights President Fred Karger.

“Multilevel Marketing” Postcard Campaign
to Amway Owner Doug DeVos

Following the Amway model, Rights Equal Rights has expanded its Postcard Campaign by asking Amway Boycott supporters to get their friends, family members, neighbors and coworkers to send in the colorful postcards to Amway CEO Doug DeVos. Our supporters will in turn will ask their friends, family members, neighbors and co-workers to join the Boycott and take similar action. According to Karger, we have already sent in hundreds and hundreds of the bright yellow cards to Doug DeVos asking him to match his $500,000 contribution to NOM by contributing an equal amount to LGBT organizations.

“Every single day we mail a batch of our Boycott Amway postcards to Mr. DeVos. We will continue to take actions in order to bring more attention to the Boycott in 2013,” said Karger. “During California’s Prop 8 campaign we boycotted four of the largest contributors to the Yes on 8 campaign and we settled two of them when the companies gave equal amounts or more to LGBT organizations.”

“The Manchester Hotels Boycott was never settled, but owner Doug Manchester, who gave $125,000 to Yes on Prop 8, publically admitted that his Manchester Grand Hyatt in San Diego was losing $1 million per month because of the boycott. He has since sold that hotel, apologized for his contribution through a spokesman and said that he would never give money to take away same-sex marriage again.

If You Don’t Like Chick-fil-A — You’ll Really Hate Amway

“We will be reaching out to many more organizations and individuals to join the Amway Boycott utilizing the theme, “If you didn’t like Chick-fil-A (for all of owner Dan Cathy’s big anti-LGBT contributions and statements) just wait until you hear about Amway,” said Karger.

And here’s something from my inbox from the P’town film society auction:

The Provincetown Film Society Auction closes on December 9, 2012 at 11:00 PM EST.

If you’ve got your heart set on a special item… you still have time to win!

Check Out These Great Buys…
You can still bid on any of the special items in our
auction right up to the final seconds of this exciting event. Every tick of the clock brings us closer to the finish line. This may be your last chance to win that special item or to grab a great bargain. So don’t miss out… BID NOW!

Spread the Word!
Remind your friends the end is almost here! Just
Refer your Friends so they have the chance to offer their support and get some great last-minute deals.
Don’t Forget: Every bid supports the Capital Campaign for the renovation and new equipment at Waters Edge Cinema!

View All Auction Items

The Rainbow Detective Agency
Book 2

Happy New Year Gratitude

Happy New Year Gratitude

I wish I could say I hate to see 2014 end, but 2014 was not an easy year. I don’t like to go into detail about personal things on the blog or on social media, but last year Tony and I had two family members diagnosed with stage four cancer, we spent a good part of the year in places like Memorial Sloan Kettering Cancer Center in New York, and there were some very intense moments I’d rather not live through again. Some of that is continuing and will always be there. It just seemed as though 2014 started out with the kind of things no one ever wants to deal with. Thanks to a private support group on Facebook, Whipple Surgery Survivor Group, I learned there are a lot of us out there dealing with similar situations.

In the same respect, it wasn’t a totally bad year. I think it has to do with priorities…because some things, like cancer, just trump everything else and we tend to diminish the other things as they happen along the way. Last January Tony and I were legally married by Vermont Supreme Court Justice, Beth Robinson, in Montgomeryville, VT. You can read about that here, where I’ve posted photos. To add to the excitement of getting married in Vermont, we became part of a Hollywood documentary titled, The State of Marriage, that will be released sometime in the future. The producer, Jeff Kaufman, was wonderful, and so was the entire crew. But to be honest the actual marriage ceremony trumped everything else so much I didn’t even realize there were cameras in the room. If you’re thinking about getting married and doing it a little differently, I highly suggest going up to Montgomeryville. It was very simple, not too much red tape, and the little town is fantastic. Some of the best skiing on the east coast is up there.

Even though the wedding was monumental, in spite of the fact that we’ve been together for 23 years, the ride home was a little disappointing. We drove through several states where we were still legally married, only to return to Bucks County, PA, which is right across the border of New Jersey (we live a mile from NJ where marriage was legal), where we still weren’t considered legally married on a state or federal level. Thankfully, and I don’t use that word lightly, that all changed as 2014 moved forward thanks to Judge John E. Jones III for ruling that the ban against gay marriage in PA was unconstitutional. As I look back on these posts to which I’m linking it all seems so foreign now, as if there never had been a marriage ban in the first place. And look around: the world didn’t end, the rapture didn’t happen, and everyone is living their lives the same way they did before.  And not one single Christian was sacrificed so a gay couple could get married.

As for work, I had a great year and accomplished many projects and met all deadlines in spite of the family health issues. Not a day passed without a new blog post. There were times during the summer when I worked well into the middle of the night on books that I had to deliver to publishers, but I finished them and learned that I can write under stress as well as when everything is smooth and calm. In fact, I think I prefer working under a certain amount of pressure.

Aside from all this, the goal for me has always been to move forward as a writer and try to remain relevant in an industry that is constantly changing. Five or six years ago e-publishers were all the rage. Not so much anymore. Self-publishing has popped a good deal of that bubble and authors are going indie faster than I can post this to the blog. I’ll always write gay erotica, but not everything I write in the future will be gay erotica from this point forward. One of the main reasons why I’ve always supported straight women writing gay fiction is that I want the opportunity to write in other genres, too. I have a few surprises in store for 2015 with books I’ve revised and changed almost completely. They were books I’d written for a publisher a while back and I had all the rights reverted back to me late in 2014. I’ll post about them in the upcoming year.

Although it wasn’t a perfect year, 2014 was definitely a busy year. That’s the main reason why I slacked off on writing book reviews here on the blog. There just wasn’t enough time left at the end of the very short days. I haven’t been to goodreads in months, and I recently noticed reviews for “Chase of a Dream” in the abridged form on Amazon that left me a little speechless. That was the book I’d self-censored to remove the detailed sex scenes. I toned it down for readers who prefer less sex in romance novels and I think some were happy with that…at least from the reviews generated on Amazon most seem to be. I’d like to say I’m going to review more books in 2015, but I can’t promise that. There are still so many posts to write with new, fresh LGBT content it’s hard to prioritize, unless I get someone here to review for me.

Speaking of reviews, I have a new book coming out in 2015 that’s a sequel to “Fangsters.” And it was one review in particular that made me write the second book a little differently than the first. In the first book I wrote several scenes that contained rough sex between the vampires. I didn’t consider this by any means BDSM, or part of the BDSM lifestyle, but one reviewer (and the review was a good one; I’m not complaining) thought otherwise. That stunned me because I didn’t expect that kind of a response. I took for granted that everyone understand some aspects of gay erotica in the traditional sense. So I made a few changes in the second book and I hope I’ve allowed that one rough character to move forward in a more interesting way. It wasn’t that I was intimidated by the review. I thought about it and I agreed with the review, which is why I made that part of the focus in the second book.

In any event, I know I wasn’t the only one who had a rough time in 2014. So many people I know went through so many difficult periods I’m thankful my experiences weren’t any worse than they were. Even the online book community seemed to get more vicious than ever. At one point I didn’t think the attacks would stop. Some actually became litigious, which is something I didn’t think I’d ever see. And with that came about a new brand of intolerance for free speech, which is a shame, because the original argument had nothing at all to do with free speech. Once again, bloggers took the biggest hit and we’re still not sure where this will end. The courts often have an interesting way of treating bloggers.

It was an fast-paced year and even though I’m glad to see it go, I’m thankful for so many things that happened I can’t even list them all here. Looking back, I think the good was balanced with the bad, to a certain extent. I even won something, which is not something that usually happens to me. I usually can’t find my keys, or my phone is missing, or I left the door open in the car all night by accident. I’m used to that kind of thing, so when I actually do win something I’m stunned.

And even that story comes with some irony. Pop star, Trevor Donovan, posted an update on Facebook last week that asked people what their favorite Christmas gift story was. I normally don’t even comment on those things, but I did have a favorite Christmas story and I shared it.When I was in college I worked part time in a men’s clothing store. There was a scarf I wanted, but at the time I couldn’t afford it. On Christmas Eve, during an employee party, a women co-worker handed me a package and inside was the scarf I’d told her I couldn’t afford. It was such a nice gesture I never forgot it and I still have the scarf somewhere in my closet to this day.

And now I have a new favorite Christmas story: the one where I won a ski hat from Trevor Donovan for writing about my favorite Christmas story. I like happy endings like that. That’s me in the hat above, in my horrible selfie. Unfortunately, my bad selfies don’t have much hope for HEA. 

I hope everyone has a safe and wonderful New Year.

If there’s one thing I learned this year, use the good china and don’t save it for later.


UK HIV Pill; Jan Brewer Troubled by Gay Marriage; Hate Bakery Gets Help


In what’s being called the most exciting development in HIV prevention, there’s a new pill being offered to the UK that’s designed to prevent HIV. The drug has already been in the US and I’ve posted about it on the blog before several times. It’s not all that new.

A landmark trial in England is to be dramatically sped up after it was found taking a single dose of pre-exposure prophylaxis (PrEP), the drug Truvada, provided unprecedented levels of protection.

 Researchers prescribed the drug to 407 men across the country, and describe it as a big success. A further 138 men waiting to start the couse will now be offered the drug immediately.

You can read the rest here. I’ll post more about this in the future. It’s not without controversy. I would highly suggest reading the comment thread that goes with this article, too. They make valid, honest points that shouldn’t be ignored.

Quote from one of my previous posts, link above:

Unfortunately, I discovered that taking Truvada gave me too many new things to feel. Whatever short-term side effects I could get, I did. Less than a week out, I started to feel a deep sense of fatigue every day around 6 p.m. It was something I could power through and eventually shake, but it made me feel like dropping to the floor and passing out instead of going to the gym or attending movie screenings. I had perpetual muscle soreness, especially in my legs, as if I had squatted way more than I should have the day before. My skin got worse. I developed a disgusting, raised rash on my torso that my dermatologist told me was the result of a nickel allergy (I had been wearing the culprit belt for years). I was gassy.

Jan Brewer Troubled by Gay Marriage

All politics aside, I find Jan Brewer a highly annoying human being just by looking at her. I guess no one’s perfect, and I admit it’s my flaw. In any event, she’s the governor of Arizona and she’s not thrilled that gay marriage has come to her state.

‘It is not only disappointing, but also deeply troubling, that unelected federal judges can dictate the laws of individual states, create rights based on their personal policy preferences and supplant the will of the people in an area traditionally left to the states for more than two hundred years,’ Brewer stated.

I find it deeply troubling that she doesn’t understand how these things work. I find it deeply troubling that she doesn’t realize the right for women to vote took the same path as gay marriage and if it had been left up to the voters in more conservative places she might not even be governor because she’s a woman. And I find it highly troubling she thinks that someone with religious beliefs has a right to vote on my life, my civil rights, and my well being based on what’s dictated by their religion that may or may not be one big spectacular fairy tale.

You can read the rest here. I guess we know which side of history she’s going down on.

One comment said this:

 What’s deeply troubling is that politicians such as her WITH an agenda always say it’s the court that issues the order that has the agenda, when in fact the court is simply following the constitution. They become “activist judges” at that point. There’s so many people out there like Brewer that it’s amazing the world can actually function in the face of all of the crap they have flying around.

Hate Bakery Gets Help

We’re living in interesting times because so many are getting financial help for things that may or may not deserve help. Sometimes my jaw literally drops when I see how much money people are willing to hand over to those who may or may not deserve it. In this case it’s interesting because a gay activist is looking to help the anti-gay owners of a bakery that refused to make cakes for gay weddings.

He wrote, ‘The Kleins say the $150,000 fee will bankrupt her family. I’m raising money to help offset that cost. I’ll send whatever we raise along to the Klein family with a message of love and peace. I don’t want them to suffer. But I am also pleading with them and other Christians to stop using the name of Jesus to explain to the LGBT community why we don’t deserve access to the civil rights afforded to heterosexuals through the legal institution of marriage.’ 

Citing his Christian faith, Aaron Klein, said at the time, ‘I didn’t want to be a part of her marriage, which I think is wrong.’

This has obvious received criticism from the LGBTI community and there hasn’t been much money raised. I get the idea; I’m not sure it’s plausible.

You can read the rest here. I guess sometimes some people have to learn the hard way. But I do think it’s interesting that gay Christians are speaking up. Christianity, whether you believe in it or not, is NOT exclusive to straight people.

Too Hard to Handle

by Ryan Field

‘It is not only disappointing, but also deeply troubling, that unelected federal judges can dictate the laws of individual states, create rights based on their personal policy preferences and supplant the will of the people in an area traditionally left to the states for more than two hundred years,’ Brewer stated. – See more at:

A landmark trial in England is to be dramatically sped up after it was found taking a single dose of pre-exposure prophylaxis (PrEP), the drug Truvada, provided unprecedented levels of protection.
Researchers prescribed the drug to 407 men across the country, and describe it as a big success. A further 138 men waiting to start the couse will now be offered the drug immediately.
– See more at:

New York Sex Club; Big Brother 13 HIV; Mark Ruffalo Stand on Gay Marriage; But He’s Not Gay He’s Really a Straight Guy

New York Sex Club

From what I gather, there’s a sex club in New York’s financial district that isn’t gay this time. It’s being dubbed as a “swingers” club, where I’m assuming they party and swap and do all sorts of other things. But the neighbors aren’t too thrilled with them. Unfortunately, the neighbors hear all kinds of noises that drive them to virtual distraction. So far, the police haven’t been able to nail them on much because the swingers all hopping, swapping, and singing for free.

Here are some of the more entertaining comments from the article.

This is an office building. We saw them move eight mattresses up there! That was horrendous.”


“If they can go that long, God bless them, but we shouldn’t have to hear it,” one tenant complained.

This one I didn’t even know existed…sexy karaoke.

“They often will do sexy karaoke, so you can hear that quite clearly through the wall.”

You can read more here. There’s a photo of the building and if you’re even remotely familiar with Manhattan real estate you can see these are not poor swingers.

I just thought I’d post and sensationalize about straight people having hot, dirty, sleazy erroneous sex for a change.

Big Brother 13 HIV

In the past I’ve posted about racism, gay hate, homophobia, and even gay baiting on Big Brother. Now Dick Donato, a former houseguest on Big Brother, Season 8, recently disclosed that he was asked to leave the Big Brother house during season 13 early because he’s HIV positive.

I remember season 13 on Big Brother very well. Yes, I watch each year. I’ll admit that. Dick, better known as “Evel Dick,” won the half million dollar grand prize during season 8, and he was asked back to the game during season 13, with his daughter, to play again. During that season, I remember being stunned that he disappeared completely from the show. And as I recall the only mention was that something family related had happened and he had to leave for personal reasons. We all knew there was more to THAT story.

Here’s what Evel Dick has to say about it now in People Magazine:

Donato was competing on season 13 of Big Brother when producers called him into the house’s Diary Room. “They told me that something was wrong with my blood test,” he says. “They had done two HIV tests. One had come back positive and the other had come back negative.” The show’s doctor took more blood. Two hours later, Donato learned the life-changing news. “When they told me, I just went numb,” he says. With little explanation, Donato left the show.” They had a car take me from CBS to my mother’s house. She was the first person I told.”

Donato is now speaking up because he’s trying to help break the stigma associated with HIV.

You can read the rest here. I have so many mixed emotions on this topic I’d rather not even get into them because I don’t think we’re getting the full story here.

Mark Ruffalo Stand on Gay Marriage

When I posted about The Normal Heart, I thought Mark Ruffalo took the film and ran with it. It’s not always the case when an actor owns his character the way Ruffalo did. And now he’s taking a public stand against Brazilian President, Marina Silva, because of her stand against gay marriage.

It all happened, once again, on Twitter. The interesting thing is the way Silva replied to him.

‘I cannot, in good conscience, support a candidate who takes a hard right approach to issues such as gay marriage and reproductive rights, even if that candidate is willing to do the right thing on environmental issues,’  he said.

‘I have fought for marriage equality in my country and see it as a reflection of the quality of a candidate.’

In response to Ruffalo, Silva posted on her Twitter account that she supports ‘gay civil marriage and expresses this in her government program.’

You can read the rest here. It’s unclear to me what “civil marriage” is considered in Brazil. It is more like domestic partnership? I have a feeling from the comment thread it’s more like civil unions. Not good. It’s also pointed out in the comments that some people are not fond of the term “gay marriage.” I only use it because people recognize that, and so do search engines. Search engines are important to anyone blogging these days. I prefer marriage equality.

But He’s Not Gay He’s Really Straight

This is one of those articles that make bloggers blink when they first see them. A guy named Michael Hoffman claims he’s humiliated. Why you ask? Because a few gay jack off videos of him recently surfaced and he’s not sure he wanted that to happen.

‘Hi guys, it’s Michael Hoffman,’ he says. ‘Most of you know me by now. I just want to say I know there are videos going around of me. I wanted to say a few things. I’m not gay. Those videos I can understand making me look that way – and I respect gay people completely – but I’m not gay, I’m straight.’

Hoffman explained why he made the videos: ‘I need the money, plain and simple. I made over $10,000 selling those videos.’

There’s more here, and it only devolves from where I left off. Why you ask again? Because he’s not only humiliated for doing jack off videos, he also humiliated and very defensive about being thought of as gay. (It’s okay that you’re gay, but make it clear that I’m not.) And that’s the real insult to all gay people everywhere. The shame he feels is the same shame they’ve made us live with all our lives.

I wish these straight guys would just get a clue for once. He could have handled this so differently and no one would have cared. What he should really be humiliated about is coming off so homophobic.

If you don’t really get that, try thinking about it this way. A gay guy has photos of himself published and makes long, detailed explanations that he’s NOT straight. In fact, I don’t think I’ve ever heard a gay person do that. …”Yeah, those nude photos are me, but I’m not straight. Get that. Don’t give me weird looks. There’s nothing wrong with straight people. But I’m not one of them.”

I hope you get the point, because, you know, I’m not straight either. There’s nothing wrong with those straights. But I’m not one of them.

Glendora Hill: Too Hard to Handle

by Ryan Field

Publisher Purchase Link $4.99 (always cheaper at the publisher)Purchase Link to 

Bareback Sex; Hit the Floor: Gay Basketball; Rick Santorum on Marriage

Bareback Sex

There’s a new survey out that discusses when guys are more apt to have bareback sex…risky sex without a condom. Evidently, it seems to happen after using drugs or alcohol. The survey was conducted by Gay Times.

“We set out to ask our readers to be as frank as possible about their lifestyle choices so that, at last, there would be some facts to either backup or debunk the many notions that are frequently alluded to,” Scott said. “What we found was fascinating, and sometimes upsetting, but if just one person now takes extra care when mixing sex with addictive substances in future, then we know we’ve done something right.”

It’s a difficult article to parse, because it sounds as if they set out to disabuse a few misconceptions the mainstream media was promoting and wound up shocked that some of these things are, in fact, true. Maybe I’m reading this all wrong, but that’s how it sounds to me. Out of all the gay men surveyed, three quarters use recreational drugs.

This alone is startling:

Two thirds of respondents said they had sex while under the influence of recreational drugs, and 60 percent said they were more likely to have sex with a stranger while on drugs.

You can read more here, where they list more results. I don’t like to comment on these things because I’ve been married for almost twenty-two years and I’ve been living a married, monogamous life. However, when I was single I didn’t use recreational drugs either. Twenty-two years ago I was too terrified to let my guard down to have bareback sex because times were VERY different.

Hit the Floor: Gay Basketball

There’s a new basketball drama on VH1 called Hit the Floor, and the star player on this fictional TV basketball team in LA is bisexual. According to this link, this star player is having an intimate relationship with his agent. He also had an affair with a woman.

Since Zero had been involved in an affair with a scheming cheerleader, the relationship with Jude came as a bit of a surprise.

You can read more here. I haven’t seen it yet, but I’m going to put a DVR alert on. It seems to be getting more popular these days, adding a gay storyline. Or, in this case, a bisexual storyline. I wonder how long this will last.

Rick Santorum on Marriage

This is interesting to me because I have to wonder if Rick Santorum is really in touch with what’s happening out there these days with heteronormative couples…straight people. He’s always trying to push the argument that same sex marriage will cause marriage in general to devolve into horrors like polygamy. But yet he never actually addresses the issues with marriage that are going on with straight couples right now. For one, the divorce rate. Two, that young straight people aren’t getting married the same way they did twenty years ago. Most of the straight people I know between twenty and thirty are still single, still living alone, and have no plans to get married any time soon. Those who aren’t single live together and remain engaged indefinitely. They even buy property together without the legal benefits of marriage: a mistake. I don’t see how gay people can be held accountable for THAT hot mess. In fact, the gay people I know are far more conservative and traditional than the straight people I know when it comes to marriage in a general sense.

Yet Rick Santorum says things like this:

‘If marriage is simply a romantic relationship between two people, and by the way, that’s what it’s devolved to the minds of a lot of Americans, if that’s all that marriage is well then it’s hard to make the argument that any two people or any three or four people shouldn’t be able to get married.’

Yeah, well, not in my marriage…or in my home. And not in the homes of the many other gay couples I know who’ve been together for the long haul. If anything, I worry more about the straight community and how they seem to view marriage nowadays. Tony and I have nieces and nephews who seem so stuck and terrified to make that move toward marriage they don’t know how much they’re actually missing. They don’t seem to realize they’re going to be young for a short time and old for a very long time…or that once that proverbial ship has sailed it’s not coming back again.

If Rick Santorum really cares about marriage as much as he claims he does, he should get his head out of his ass and address the real issues, none of which include gay marriage as a huge threat. Start working on the divorce rate with straight couples. Tell them what I’ve learned after twenty-two years of marriage: be realistic. You’re going to get old, you’re going to change, and you’re never going to be the person you were at twenty that you are at forty. And, you’re gong to die. If you think you can avoid any of these things, I wish you luck.

You can read more here.

Chase of a Holy Ghost
by Ryan Field
The Ghost and Mr. Moore
by Ryan Field

Marco Rubio Gay Marriage; Nathan Lane on Gayface; More Simon Cowell; Small Town Romance Writer

Marco Rubio Gay Marriage

This interesting way to twist and spin things around is something that politicians like Marco Rubio have turned into an art form. At least I hope that’s what it is because if he really believes this nonsense we’re all in a lot of trouble. In short, at least from what I can gather from this link, Rubio claims that just because someone is not supportive of gay marriage that doesn’t make him/her anti-gay. I’ve heard this convoluted logic before. I’ll comment below.

‘I promise you even before this speech is over I’ll be attacked as a hater or a bigot or someone who is anti-gay.

‘This intolerance in the name of tolerance is hypocrisy. Support for the definition of marriage as one man and one woman is not anti-gay, it is pro-traditional marriage.’

He added: ‘Today there is a growing intolerance on this issue, intolerance for those who continue to support traditional marriage.’

He is claiming that those who are supportive of gay marriage are the most intolerant even though they claim to be fighting for tolerance. I know. It reads as confusing as it was to write.

However, this is where the spin comes in. Gay marriage is NOT about tolerance or intolerance, not at the most basic level. Gay marriage is about equal rights, giving equal rights to US citizens who have been denied the same basic equal rights that heteronormative couples have always had. Gay marriage is not about God or religion. Last I heard we’re living in a country that is supposed to know the difference between church and state. I just believe in equal rights, the same equal rights that allow someone to practice a religion or marry the person they love. It wasn’t that long ago when interracial marriages were illegal in many states. Or, even worse, when women were not allowed to vote.

I also think this is why the Republican party should really reconsider its so-called star players in the next general election. People like Marco Rubio are going to turn off gay Republicans, moderate Republicans, and younger Republicans.

And, for the record, I don’t think Rubio is a hater or bigot or someone who is anti-gay. I doubt that the gay Republicans I know would feel that way either. Or the Republicans who have sons, daughters, mothers or fathers who are gay. I just think Marco Rubio is trying to be clever with an issue that’s already won the popular vote in the most recent polls and he’s choking the same way he choked after the last State of the Union Address. You’d think a guy would learn the first time around.

There’s more here.

Nathan Lane on Gayface

It seems that actor, Nathan Lane, whom I’ve always known to play the most stereotypical gay roles in films, claims he’s thrilled to see straight actors play gay roles. He’s also played straight roles and he’s thankful that he had a chance to do this. I’m not disagreeing with him completely. I just think he’s leaving a great deal out.

Lane said this:

‘We just had ‘The Normal Heart’ [with] Mark Ruffalo, fantastic job. I think who’s right for the part and most talented [should get the part],’ Lane said, according to

 ‘That way only madness lies … I wouldn’t have played Nathan Detroit or Max Bialystock [if I’d only been allowed to play gay characters],’ Lane said, referring to characters he performed in Guys and Dolls and The Producers.

I praised Mark Ruffalo more than anyone else in The Normal Heart. Mark Ruffalo carried that film and made it great. I have nothing but praise for Mark Ruffalo. But it’s not just as simple as who plays gayface and who plays straight. It goes much deeper than that and my post yesterday about the GLAAD survey where Hollywood has failed gays so far is a good example of this. It’s trendy and fascinating for Matt Damon to play gayface, and even though he did a great job no one complains when he laughs at kissing a guy after he finishes a role. But when Matt Bomer was up for the part of Christian Grey in Fifty Shades of Grey it was a completely different story. I posted about that many times.

I’m not even going to mention the fact that so many gay men in Hollywood are terrified to come out, still, for fear they won’t get the parts straight actors get. And I’m not talking about “straight” parts in musical theater like the ones Lane plays. I agree with Lane that sexuality really should NOT be an issue when it comes to acting in a film, however, when they even the score and give openly gay actors the same chances they give straight actors I’ll agree with Lane. But right now, as it stands, Hollywood has a long way to go on this issue.

There’s more here.

More Simon Cowell

Last week I posted about Tulisa making statements that Simon Cowell is allegedly gay. I didn’t believe it then, and I followed up with a post about Simon Cowell responding to these allegations. And I’m thrilled to announce that I was right, and Simon Cowell is not gay. But the underlying message here is important to consider.

This is what Tulisa said recently:

Varey released a statement of apology on Wednesday (23 July) saying that ‘in the course of seeking to entrap Tulisa, the reporter, Mazher Mahmood, supplied Tulisa, him and others with a lot of alcohol.

‘I can no longer recall all of the details of that evening but I have listened to the recording made by Mahmood. I was clearly very drunk. ‘At some point and utterly out of the blue Mahmood asked me if Simon Cowell was gay. I said he was.

This is not true. I do not know why I said it, but assume it is because I was so drunk and felt that I was giving Mahmood the type of information he was seeking. I am very sorry for this.’

The issue shouldn’t be about whether or not Simon Cowell is gay, because there should be no shame whatsoever attached to being gay. It shouldn’t sound as if it were a drunken accusation…or a slur. There should be no apologies offered in a way that makes it sound as if there’s something wrong with being gay. Maybe I’m reading too much into this, but that’s how it sounds to me.

There’s more here.

In Cowell’s defense, he did make his own statements that sound much better than the apology:

‘In 2014 the question of whether someone is or is not gay is antiquated. As it happens he isn’t, though if he were, he would simply have said so.

 ‘However, the issue was the false suggestion made by Mr Varey that Simon – who is renowned for his honesty and candidness – had thus not been truthful in the public arena and this is what we have been obliged to clarify.’

To put this in another perspective think about how I might react if someone in a drunken state who wanted to get even with me said I was straight. I’d smile and ignore it completely. I wouldn’t think of it as an accusation or a slur. I wouldn’t feel the need to defend myself with a reply. I would kiss my husband and dismiss it completely.

Here’s more about what Cowell said.

Small Town Romance Writer
by Ryan Field