Category: Gay Labels

Kim Davis’ Constant Refusal; The Danish Girl Eddie Redmayne; 12 Year Old Gets Support From Andrew Goldstein

Kim Davis’ Constant Refusal

On Tuesday in Rowan County Kentucky, that clerk, Kim Davis, flatly refused to issue marriage licenses to same sex couples in yet another attempt to defy the law.

The U.S. Supreme Court on Monday declined to intervene in the case, leaving Davis no legal grounds to refuse to grant licenses to gay couples. A district judge could now hold her in contempt, which can carry steep fines or jail time.

If you watch the video, you’ll see this is not a humble woman nor is she in any way remotely saint-like. From her expression to the tone in her voice, you’ll see absolute hatred for same sex couples. 

I’ve seen and heard a lot of discussion about this on social media, from both sides. The bottom line, whether you agree with her or not, is that she’s violating the law. This isn’t about being mean to her. You might not agree with a 55 mph speed limit based on your religious beliefs, but if you don’t adhere to it you’ll wind up paying a price. And I think that’s what going to have to happen here. You either have respect for the law, or you don’t.

You can read the rest and see the video here. 

The Danish Girl Eddie Redmayne

Eddie Redmayne has done it again in an upcoming film titled, The Danish Girl, and this time with a trans character he’s nailed better than anything I’ve seen before in a movie trailer.  It really is the kind of artistic culture that makes dealing with these back fence Christians like Kim Davis tolerable. It shows there’s always a balance between the most absurd and the most magnificent.

This time he headlines as Lile Elbe, the Danish painter born Einar Wegener and considered one of the world’s first trans women and who underwent the first gender reassignment surgery in 1930. The dramatic love story, adapted from the book by David Ebershoff, opens in New York and Los Angeles on November 27, and in additional cities in December. We can’t wait!

You can see the trailer here. 

12 Year Old Gets Support From Andrew Goldstein

This is a great story about a 12 year old athlete, Braeden Lange, who came out as gay in a moment of sheer frustration online…while others were making gay jokes. I see the idiots make them all the time on Twitter and sometimes I go after them, sometimes I don’t. The best one I’ve seen so far was this straight guy comparing gay men to light beer. I went after that one. I think that sometimes…we should tell them. In any event, after Lange came out online his parents received all the notifications he’d received from friends and he wound up basically coming out to the entire world.

He endured nothing but homophobia in the days that followed. His parents did embrace him, after the initial shock wore off, and his dad told him about Andrew Goldstein, another pro athlete who came out about 20 years ago.

“It really gave me some hope knowing that if he could do it, I could probably do it too,” Braeden remembers.

Braeden’s dad reached out to Goldstein, who is now a post-doctoral researcher at UCLA, via email to see if there was a chance he’d talk with Braeden.

Andrew sent Braeden a video message, telling him, “You’re the bravest kid I’ve ever heard of.” He also sent Braeden the helmet he wore during the period he came out. “I think it belongs with you so you know I stand with you,” Andrew told him.

I post often about how pro athletes like Goldstein and Michael Sam inspire younger people, however, I don’t always have good examples to give. Here’s one. Pay attention to it, especially those of you who insult us each and every time you tell us that labels don’t matter. Being gay matters to this kid and millions more like him.

You can read more here.


James Franco and Interior. Leather Bar; No "Labels" No Community; Ted Cruz’s Father on Gays; Christian Group’s Questionable TV Ads

James Franco and Interior. Leather Bar.

I can’t say that I hated Interior. Leather Bar. We watched it on NetFlix last night. Well, most of it. Tony made me turn it off toward the end because he couldn’t sit through “another minute of it.”

I do think it’s interesting, from a cultural point of view, when people who know very little about gay culture try to explain gay culture…in their own terms. What I basically got from the whole movie was an exaggerated version of gay culture that was often amusing…in a weekend Twitter sort of way. A few of the heteronormative actors seemed more interested in hanging on to James Franco’s fame than examining the gay experience. In fact, I’m not sure how James Franco managed to keep a straight face, pardon the pun, while shooting certain scenes. I would have been rolling on the floor. In this sense, I think Franco is a genius. And he seems to know who’s full of crap and who isn’t. 

The thing I did like about it was the general message, a message that’s more about liberating the mainstream from what they’ve been taught to fear about sex…or avoid. It’s nothing to see violence of all kinds on TV and in films, however, don’t dare show a penis, especially one that’s erect. Keep sex censored at all times. At least I think that’s what Franco was going for. If it was, I agree with that part.

You can see more about it here at imdb…

Filmmakers James Franco and Travis Mathews re-imagine the lost 40 minutes from “Cruising” as a starting point to a broader exploration of sexual and creative freedom.

No “Labels” No Community

I read this piece a while ago and remembered it for some reason. Probably because I’m always seeing people state they don’t like labels. I think in most cases the people who say they don’t like labels are coming from good places…it’s innocent and they really do wish we lived in a world without labels…a perfect world. But there are two sides to the story and even if you don’t totally agree, this article presents a few excellent points.

Well butter my butt and call me a biscuit, I had no idea that we were no longer marginalized to the point that we no longer needed to be able to identify our community. That we were fully accepted by society at large as well as by the GGGG community. That it was time to relax and rest on our laurels, because our work here is done. It’s not like the piece quotes a high-profile gay blogger who says that of course bisexuality isn’t real because he posed as one too, to “ease the transition”.

You can read the rest here. 

Ted Cruz’s Father On Gays

I guess we shouldn’t be surprised by this. Ted Cruz’s father’s stand on gays isn’t that much different from Ted’s.

“You’ve got to realize that that decision was not about homosexual marriage, that decision was a decision against religious liberty. What was the basis for their decision? It was the 14th Amendment. That means they’re calling homosexuality a civil right. Understand me well, if they’re calling homosexuality a civil right, that means that the next obvious step is a homosexual may come to your church and demand to be hired, whether as pastor or a janitor is immaterial, and if you say, ‘I’m sorry I cannot hire you because it violates my religious faith,’ you’re going to be slapped with a civil rights discrimination lawsuit.”

And there you are.

I can’t promise you much in this world, but I can promise you one thing for certain: I will never, ever, demand to be hired in any capacity at your church. In fact, if you invite me to your church I’ll be thinking up excuses not to go before we finish texting.

The rest is here.

Christian Group’s Questionable TV Ads

This is happening in Australia, with right wing Christians, again.

A funny thing is happening during commercial breaks in Australia — subscribers to regional satellite TV are being inundated with antigay propaganda wrapped in a neat little package dubbed “family values.”

Actually, the package isn’t so neat. Viewers are subjected to some of the most awkward moments of broadcasting we can recall seeing — four ads depict the inner monologues of a traditional nuclear family, calling on them to go “back to the table” for family dinners.

You can read the rest of it here, where there are videos of the ads.  The article continues with statements like this:

James Dobson, has said: “Same-sex relationships undermine the future generation’s understanding of the fundamental principles of marriage, parenthood, and gender.”

The Rainbow Detective Agency Book 6

The Scottish Duke

Robbie Rogers Gay Masculinity; Twinks, Daddies, Jocks; Transgender Fairy Dolls

Robbie Rogers Gay Maculinity

It was hard to title this part of the post. I thought about using “Gay Stereotypes” and a variety of other interesting words often used with respect to gay men. I’ve often talked about how we usually see only one type of gay man portrayed in the mainstream, when the truth is that there are all kinds of gay men and if people really knew this there might not be any stereotypes at all.

But as it stands this is still a discreet topic and many gay men haven’t even come out at all. Many don’t come out because of stereotypes. It’s not a simple topic. The other day I posted on FB about Michael Sam mentioning there are other gay pro football players and one gay guy commented that Sam shouldn’t have said that. The guy who commented thought it might start a “witch hunt.” That floored me a little because even gay people don’t always see the importance of coming out…as difficult as it is to do for all of us. 

In any event, Robbie Rogers is a gay athlete and they’re doing a sitcom about his life. ABC is doing this, which doesn’t give us much hope that it will be either accurate or funny…because it’s network TV. But the main point right now is that Robbie Rogers has asked to have a masculine actor play him in the sitcom, and if this is done right it sounds as though it could be something different for a change…something with which other gay men can identify.

 We want to teach people through laughter and play with stereotypes.

“It’s gotta be someone funny, someone who doesn’t care and someone very masculine; someone you wanna grab a beer with. In a perfect world – he obviously wouldn’t do this and I don’t think I’m anything like him – but someone like Chris Pratt. You know, someone hilarious, good looking but not super fit, you know what I mean? So it looks like he doesn’t go to the gym kind of thing…”

Now you would think that was an innocent comment from Rogers. However, if you move down to the comment thread and see some of the vicious comments left by disgruntled people you would think Rogers killed a kitten. It’s also two-sided and it sparked an interesting discussion.

You can read the rest here.

Twinks, Daddies, Jocks

Here’s a link to an article about the various definitions often used to portray small groups of gay men. It’s interesting because it shows how the gay community can often be so diversified…and it’s hard to argue with any of them, except that they only define small groups. I don’t fit into any of the categories and no one I know does.

Here are two I didn’t even know existed:

Pocket Gay
Petite and small in stature, a pocket gay is a travel-sized homosexual who stands under 5’7, even in shoes, and is often highly sought after the moment he steps into a gay bar.

Short guy
Petite and small in stature, a short guy stands under 5’7, even in shoes, and is overlooked or assumed to be gay when he steps into a straight bar.

I probably could have lived a full and happy life never knowing these labels exist, however, I’m just passing the information on with this one. It’s just one of those topics where you’re not sure whether to laugh or kick something.

You can read the rest here. 

I’d like to know one thing: what about the gay men who own homes, pay taxes, vote, are active members of their communities, and have families? Guess what, they even go to church. You know, the majority of gay men out there in the world today. Your cousin, your neighbor, and even your facebook friend. Never see a name for them anywhere in these trashy clickbait articles.

Transgender Fairy Dolls

I’m not talking about a category or a stereotype this time. There’s a new toy doll out on the market that’s “shocking” parents because it’s a transgender fairy doll. But even that information is sketchy because it could have been a mistake. And I don’t really know enough about transgender people to comment honestly about this, but I would think this might be insulting on a certain level. I could be wrong about that. I really don’t know.

News about the doll broke after a mother claimed her three-year-old daughter discovered the penis under the doll’s skirt. She posted a picture of it on her Facebook account. The story quickly went viral, causing a stir across the country, before eventually turning into a worldwide pandemic among concerned parents.

The toy was made in China. It is unknown whether the penis was intentional on the part of the manufacturers or if was a factory defect, though we’re going to take a wild guess and say it wasn’t intentional.
I will say this. The transgender people I know don’t identify with fairy dolls. They identify with a specific gender, period. Unfortunately, as it stands the comments aren’t too helpful with this one. I was hoping to learn more, but didn’t.
You can read the rest here, with a photo of the doll. 

Chase of a Christmas Dream

Brooke Birmingham & Shape Magazine; Gay Writer Labels; Johnny Weir AGAIN

Brooke Birmingham & Shape Magazine

There’s a blogger,, who has been writing about her incredible weight loss journey online since 2009 and she lost a considerable amount of weight. In the process, she’s inspired thousands. Someone at Shape Magazine discovered her and wanted to share her story with more people who they thought would be interested in her success story. They exchanged a few e-mails, the blogger sent an innocent photo, and Shape Magazine ultimately rejected her because she was wearing a bikini top in the photo and Shape claims they don’t use photos like that. They wanted her to send another photo fully clothed.

I don’t read Shape Magazine…or anything like that because I think they are stupid…but the blogger claims that Shape uses photos of men and women in bikinis all the time. The blogger wrote this:

Again, not happy about it. I was to be a part of their Success Stories feature on the website, where there are women in bikinis. Why all of the sudden was it ‘their policy’?

I did a simple search myself to see what the Shape Magazine web site looks like and I found several photos, right up front, with women wearing something similar to the blogger’s photo…and a few other photos at Shape with women wearing far less. There’s one I saw on the sidebar of a woman in a bikini bottom that looks more like a band aid. In fact, there is even one of that hideous, untalented creature, Bethenny Frankel, the high profile reality TV name from fresh hell, wearing a hot pink bikini on a beach. I can’t post their content here legally, and I’m not trashing my blog with a screen shot of Frankel, but you can check it out with this quick link.

The diet blogger has shared the innocent photo she sent to Shape on her blog, screen shots of her e-mail correspondence with Shape Magazine and you can read Shape’s comments about not posting photos with bikinis, verbatim.

But I think this is the most important part of the blogger’s most recent post discussing all this. She’s been honest and up front:

The whole thing still really frustrates me because I don’t feel like my body was given the same respect as others on their site. Why all of the sudden is it their policy to have fully clothed people? The reporter stated that she wasn’t sure if someone had complained about the previous photos to Shape or not. But in my eyes if someone is complaining about them featuring women in bikinis, then again they shouldn’t have them anywhere on the site.

If anything, the should want my picture on their site. My body is real, not photoshopped or hidden because I feel like I should be ashamed. This is a body after losing 172 pounds, a body that has done amazing things, and looks AMAZING in a freaking bikini.

You can read the blogger’s full post here. And here’s an article about it on Yahoo.

My only comment comes from a blogger’s POV. As a blogger I often post things you wouldn’t normally see in larger magazines or web sites like Shape. Partly because they don’t let you say fuck there and partly because I don’t like censorship of any kind. Magazines like Shape are selling a brand and an image and there’s always a spin and a twist. This kind of old time advertising, branding, and journalism has been going on since the early part of the last century and I think bloggers like me) are sick of it and they are fighting back in their own small ways. I think readers are, too. So as a blogger supporting another blogger I would just like to say thank you to Brooke for standing up for her right to free speech and for standing up for her personal beliefs. She may or may not know it, but this goes way deeper than diet. This is about integrity and censorship.

I think Shape Magazine, and all other publications in the floundering magazine industry, should focus less on repulsive names like Frankel and really pay closer attention to what people are interested in reading about now. I agree with Brooke and I think they would have been doing their readership a service by posting the feature and using Brooke’s original photo.

Gay Labels

I often post about how many gay men tend to remain blank for most of their lives on their sexuality, especially gay men in the public eye. And most especially successful gay male writers. If you are openly gay you are expected to write gay content. If no one knows you can write about anything you want and no one will question you. This piece about playwright, Alan Bennett, is a good example of this. For most of his life and career he didn’t want to be labeled gay.

‘My objection about people knowing more about one’s private life was that I didn’t want to be put in a pigeonhole,’ he said, in a celebration of his career on a his regrets of not being more open about his sexuality earlier.

You can read more here, where Bennett mentions a few of his regrets.

The odd twist here is that gay men like Bennett are the ones we need the most because they help break the stereotypes. I don’t think Bethenny Frankel would dare to treat Bennett like a pet poodle.

Johnny Weir AGAIN

I almost didn’t post about this. I just want him to go away. But because I have been posting about Johnny Weir’s odd marriage/divorce to Victor Voronov I guess I should do a follow up. I even know how to spell Voronov without looking it up anymore, unfortunately.

Anyway, after several public shitstorms that garnered them both a great deal of unwarranted attention, Weir and his husband have decided to reconcile. And Weir tweeted about it. (How else?) Can’t you just picture him sitting there rewriting the tweet over and over again before he enters it.

‘My husband and I have happily reconciled,’ Weir tweeted. ‘Please respect our privacy and integrity at this time.’

Yes, Weir actually used the word integrity. This is coming from a man who thought it was more important to support the Russian Olympics than it was to support equal rights for gays.

You can read more here .