Category: Gay Dating

Raf Simons’ Erect Penis Jacket; Snagging A Hot Gay Date; Anti-Gay Benham Brothers, Again

Raf Simons’ Erect Penis Jacket

Raf Simons, a designer I’ve always liked, has designed a jacket with an erect penis that brings new meaning to male full frontal nudity.

For his latest partnership—which debuted today at his spring 2017 show in Florence, Italy—Simons chose late American photographer Robert Mapplethorpe, known for his raw, provocative photos, oftentimes focused on the nude male anatomy.

Perhaps it shouldn’t come as a surprise, then, that one of Simons’s new jackets has a stark, uncensored shot of an erect penis printed on the back:
You can check this out here, along with other provocative fashion attempts to expose the penis. 
I agree with the article, and I love posting things like this. I think it’s a form of artistic expression. 

Snagging A Hot Gay Date

Here are ten ways to snag a hot gay date through technology. Evidently, this is how everyone is meeting these days.

I think this one is especially important. I’m not a huge grammar police fan, but no one wants to hook up with an idiot.

6. No punctuation
Run on sentences are confusing to read it is hard to know where one thought ends and the next begins with no commas this is how creepy guys wrote personals ads in the 90’s

You can check the rest out here. 

Anti-Gay Benham Brothers, Again

These two ultra heteronormative brothers are making fists and headlines again for more comments they made about gays. This time they don’t hate us.

“Our hearts are just broken for the families and for the victims, those who were killed in the gay bar, the gay club in Orlando, Florida,” David Benham say in the video. “You know, this is going to be politicized on both sides. It’s ridiculous! No one should ever be targeted like this, this ISIS plot. And clearly they’re targeting homosexual people.”

There’s nothing wrong there. I even agree with them. The fact that they’re good looking men probably helps their cause…to a certain extent.

But then it devolves into “ugh” territory when they start talking about reforming us with Christian values. Actually, it’s not what I consider hateful, and it’s not supportive either. I’ve seen this kind of thing before, and I saw it all over social media after the Orlando massacre. They don’t condone our being gay, but they don’t want to see us getting killed. It’s a true mixed message. The problem is that these radical “Christians” in the US don’t understand gay people at all. For one thing, there are actually gay Christians. And not all gay people go to pride events. Maybe the Benham brothers should start targeting law schools…or gay doctors in hospitals like my nephew and see how far they get with their rather unsophisticated approach.

You can read the rest here.


The Arrangement 

No Gay Sex: George R.R. Martin; Sex Culture: Queer as Folk; Gay Texting: Mike Alvear

No Gay Sex: George R. R. Martin

George R.R. Martin, author of A Song of Ice and Fire, which is the book series upon which Game of Thrones is based, was asked why his books don’t have any gay sex scenes even though they are filled with straight sex scenes. His reply is actually about as professional as it gets. He writes each chapter from one character’s POV in the first person and he claims none of these characters are gay and it wouldn’t work for that reason.

“I’m not going to do it just for the sake of doing it. If the plot lends itself to that — if one of my viewpoint characters is in a situation, then I’m not going to shy away from it — but you can’t just insert things because everyone wants to see them.”

Fans have written him about having more m/m sex scenes.

“It is not a democracy. If it was a democracy, then Joffrey would have died much earlier than he did.”

I don’t follow his books or Game of Thrones, so I can’t comment on the content at all. But the article to which I’m linking isn’t too thrilled with his answer. And I take exception to this. As a gay writer who often writes novels where each chapter has a character with a different POV, I find that I have to remain true to the character.

But more than that, in my books I don’t see how writing straight sex scenes into any storyline I’ve ever written would help the book or move the story forward. And that’s what sex scenes are supposed to…add to the story and/or move the story forward. Frankly, I don’t even like the fact that a author of this article is asked Martin a question like this. It also shows how little this author knows about writing.

I find Martin’s answer plausible and honest and genuine. You don’t just write gay sex scenes for the sake of doing it, especially during a time when too many are already gay baiting, exploiting gays, and using gay content for monetary gain.

You can read the rest of the article here.

Sex Culture: Queer as Folk

Russell T. Davies who created the UK Queer as Folk is planning to do a new show called Tofu. It’s about sex culture and the premise sounds interesting.

Russell T. Davies, who penned the original British installment of “Queer as Folk,” has announced plans for “Tofu,” an eight-part series about modern sex culture, according to The Independent.

On Red Productions’ website, director Benjamin Cook describes “Tofu” as a “light-hearted documentary series” about “good sex, bad sex, real-life sex. Smut, basically.”

I remember watching the US version of Queer as Folk and liking it when it first came out. But then I watched the UK version and absolutely loved it. It’s hard to compare the two. They were both good and came around at just the right time in gay culture because gay men were desperate for it. Up until then, we had nothing but dark depressing stories. And there’s nothing wrong with dark depressing stories, but a little fun is okay, too.

You can read more here.

Gay Texting: Mike Alvear

I see articles all the time and pass on them because they are so stupid. But sometimes I come across one that is so colossally idiotic I can’t pass on it for that very reason…idiotic because it’s funny. In this case it’s a piece by someone named Mike Alvear. I think he’s being funny. I hope he’s being funny. I can’t imagine anyone taking this seriously because this stuff is so funny…and even a little warped.

Get this:

Of course, it isn’t you he’s testing; it’s your typing. Do your texts make him laugh or reach for the Rolaids? You are constantly being assessed by the content of your texts (just as you’re assessing his). In fact, your texts are pretty much your defining characteristic until you talk on the phone or hang out somewhere real.

Now THAT’S the kind of pressure we all want to hear in an already stressful situation.

But it gets better. He suggests you have pre-made, go-to texts for every occasion. In the article to which I’m linking he only gives a few examples, but there’s a link there where I found a few more.

I got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section.

“Lose 5 Pounds in 5 days”. My upbeat view of abortion

I’m going to state the obvious again…I think. It’s supposed to be funny…I think. Unfortunately, someone who left a comment didn’t get the joke…which, of course, made it even funnier.

You can read more here.

The Sheriff and the Outlaw
by Ryan Field

Cosmo Bad BDSM Tips; Be a Better Bottom; Top & Bottom Label; Small Town Romance Writer by Ryan Field

Cosmo Bad BDSM Tips

One thing I find interesting about this online post at Jezebel is that while it slams Cosmo’s bad BDSM tips it mentions nothing about the bad BDSM in the Fifty Shades of Grey novel by E. L. James. This leads me to believe the author of the Jezebel post knows little about FSoG, the novel, or that one of the biggest complaints from critics was that FSoG didn’t portray BDSM in a way that most who are serious about the lifestyle found plausible. I’ve posted about all this before, here, multiple times with the book I was in, Fifty Writers on Fifty Shades of Grey.  

But in spite of all this, the post does redeem itself by calling attention to this stupid Cosmo article about BDSM:

But I’ve got to tell you: Cosmo’s BDSM tips make Fifty Shades of Grey look like The Story of O.

The post is actually amusing, especially this one. First is the Cosmo tip…

7. “As you’re riding him, clamp down on his earlobes with your fingers, and pull on them to rock yourself forward and backward.”

Pro-tip: if you’re new to this game, stick with the sturdy body parts — like butts and chests — and be a little more delicate if you’re going for the ears, eyes, or testicles. That stuff’s not off-limits (in theory), but given that you may already be holding a fork in this scenario, it seems wise to err on the side of caution.
You can read the rest here. I think posts like this prove several things. Few people really understand the BDSM lifestyle and really don’t care to learn more about it. And, Cosmo might be one reason why the magazine publishing is a dying industry.
 Be a Better Bottom
Who can really say what makes a person a better bottom? But this article I’m linking to now doesn’t give bad advice by any means. It comes from first hand experience, and it’s well presented.
This one piece of advice seems to be something on which all good bottoms agree:
Basically douching is the process of cleaning out your insides. Usually it involves some kind of variation on a squirt bottle or hose inserted in to the anus.
I’ve heard turkey basters work, too, if you’re in a pinch. Just DON’T put it back in the kitchen when you’re finished.
This info about position can be helpful:
Starting by sitting on top of him is a good way to begin if you are having trouble relaxing or experiencing pain. If you are on top you can control the angle and depth until you have loosened up enough to change positions.
Doing all “this” can be intimidating sometimes, especially if you’re not experienced. And articles like this one help ease a lot of the anxiety.
Top & Bottom Label
This next link seems to suggest that gay dating has evolved into two distinct categories. It’s frank, it’s accurate, and it goes beyond a lot of the PC nonsense we read out there about the dynamics in gay relationships. There are, indeed, a few fundamental aspects that just can’t be ignored when two gay men get together…at least in a physical sense.  
“I’ll be online,” says Jason, 33, a financial consultant, “chatting with some guy, we’ll be getting along really well, and then I’ll say I’m a bottom and he’ll say, ‘Me too. Okay. Good-bye,’ and sign off.”
Frankly, from what I do recall about dating, this type of reaction happened ten, twenty, or forty years ago as much as it continues to happen today. In spite of what you might read in other places, it’s hard to get two bottoms to take the next step because both know it’s going to be futile in the end. I think it’s just important to be honest about it in the beginning, because it’s not always easy to tell at a glance.  
I’ve heard this before, too.
Though many men despise being labeled, offering up their versatility as a selling point, like a six-figure income or well-defined lats, others say a versatile’s just a bottom in denial. “New York is a bottom town,” says Jason. “When you’re on and the profile says ‘versatile,’ you know that guy’s a bottom. It means he will top but doesn’t like to. I’m a bottom, and my profile says versatile.”
You can read the rest here. I think the subject and content is timeless.
Small Town Romance Writer
by Ryan Field