Category: fifty shades of grey

Cosmo Bad BDSM Tips; Be a Better Bottom; Top & Bottom Label; Small Town Romance Writer by Ryan Field

Cosmo Bad BDSM Tips

One thing I find interesting about this online post at Jezebel is that while it slams Cosmo’s bad BDSM tips it mentions nothing about the bad BDSM in the Fifty Shades of Grey novel by E. L. James. This leads me to believe the author of the Jezebel post knows little about FSoG, the novel, or that one of the biggest complaints from critics was that FSoG didn’t portray BDSM in a way that most who are serious about the lifestyle found plausible. I’ve posted about all this before, here, multiple times with the book I was in, Fifty Writers on Fifty Shades of Grey.  

But in spite of all this, the post does redeem itself by calling attention to this stupid Cosmo article about BDSM:

But I’ve got to tell you: Cosmo’s BDSM tips make Fifty Shades of Grey look like The Story of O.

The post is actually amusing, especially this one. First is the Cosmo tip…

7. “As you’re riding him, clamp down on his earlobes with your fingers, and pull on them to rock yourself forward and backward.”

Pro-tip: if you’re new to this game, stick with the sturdy body parts — like butts and chests — and be a little more delicate if you’re going for the ears, eyes, or testicles. That stuff’s not off-limits (in theory), but given that you may already be holding a fork in this scenario, it seems wise to err on the side of caution.
You can read the rest here. I think posts like this prove several things. Few people really understand the BDSM lifestyle and really don’t care to learn more about it. And, Cosmo might be one reason why the magazine publishing is a dying industry.
 Be a Better Bottom
Who can really say what makes a person a better bottom? But this article I’m linking to now doesn’t give bad advice by any means. It comes from first hand experience, and it’s well presented.
This one piece of advice seems to be something on which all good bottoms agree:
Basically douching is the process of cleaning out your insides. Usually it involves some kind of variation on a squirt bottle or hose inserted in to the anus.
I’ve heard turkey basters work, too, if you’re in a pinch. Just DON’T put it back in the kitchen when you’re finished.
This info about position can be helpful:
Starting by sitting on top of him is a good way to begin if you are having trouble relaxing or experiencing pain. If you are on top you can control the angle and depth until you have loosened up enough to change positions.
Doing all “this” can be intimidating sometimes, especially if you’re not experienced. And articles like this one help ease a lot of the anxiety.
Top & Bottom Label
This next link seems to suggest that gay dating has evolved into two distinct categories. It’s frank, it’s accurate, and it goes beyond a lot of the PC nonsense we read out there about the dynamics in gay relationships. There are, indeed, a few fundamental aspects that just can’t be ignored when two gay men get together…at least in a physical sense.  
“I’ll be online,” says Jason, 33, a financial consultant, “chatting with some guy, we’ll be getting along really well, and then I’ll say I’m a bottom and he’ll say, ‘Me too. Okay. Good-bye,’ and sign off.”
Frankly, from what I do recall about dating, this type of reaction happened ten, twenty, or forty years ago as much as it continues to happen today. In spite of what you might read in other places, it’s hard to get two bottoms to take the next step because both know it’s going to be futile in the end. I think it’s just important to be honest about it in the beginning, because it’s not always easy to tell at a glance.  
I’ve heard this before, too.
Though many men despise being labeled, offering up their versatility as a selling point, like a six-figure income or well-defined lats, others say a versatile’s just a bottom in denial. “New York is a bottom town,” says Jason. “When you’re on and the profile says ‘versatile,’ you know that guy’s a bottom. It means he will top but doesn’t like to. I’m a bottom, and my profile says versatile.”
You can read the rest here. I think the subject and content is timeless.
Small Town Romance Writer
by Ryan Field


Prince Harry’s Army Bud; 50 Shades 100M Sold; African American Pastors Attack Obama

Prince Harry’s Army Bud

James Wharton, author of bestselling Out in the Army, was up for an award with Out in the City Magazine and he backed out, graciously, to offer his support to someone else.

But now he has pulled out and thrown his support to British Army Major Damian Jenkins.

He credits Jenkins, an openly gay doctor in the Royal Army Medical Corps, with making the top ranks of the armed forces more LGBTI-friendly.

Wharton told GSN: ‘I was at the very bottom of the ranks, I was a trooper. He is an officer. ‘He is in circles that are quite right wing in their attitudes and about how the military should be.

We done, Sir!!

You can read more here.

Amazon link to Out in the Army, above. Here’s the blurb:

Seeking escape from the quiet Welsh countryside, James Wharton joined the British Army. Along the way, he faced a battle of his own: finding the courage to tell his fellow soldiers he is gay.

Written with searing honesty, James charts his incredible journey from punch bag to poster boy, along the way describing the tribulations of coming to terms with his sexuality. Late nights in the clubs of Soho to early mornings guarding the Queen; rocket attacks in Iraq to tank rides with Prince Harry on the plains of Canada—this is James’s life out in the army.

50 Shades 100M Sold

This is interesting. Fifty Shades of Grey is now the fastest selling book in Random House history. Sales are huge in the US and globally. I’ll show how I predicted this months before 50 Shades even started to sell, below.

Global sales are just as staggering. Arrow Books has sold more than 27 million copies in the U.K. (and Commonwealth countries), and one million copies or more in Germany, France, Spain, Brazil, and The Netherlands. The trilogy has been translated into 51 different languages, including Russian, Hebrew, Thai, Serbian, Mongolian, Icelandic, Latvian, Korean, Lithuanian, and Slovak.

And to think I posted about it here months before the mainstream even knew about it. And that’s all thanks to a book review that tore it to shreds. The theme of my post was that FS looked interesting to me (at the time) and I didn’t like the way it had been reviewed. I was posting as a blogger, not an author. I have that right to freedom of speech as a blogger. I didn’t think the review was fair. I still don’t. The post I’m talking about is here.

Excerpt from my post:

All this aside, after I read the review I went to Amazon to check out reader reviews for the book in question. Huzzah! The largest percentage of customer reviews on Amazon for this book were five star rave reviews. There were a handful of three star reviews. And one or two one star reviews. (Update 2-2014: The book is Fifty Shades of Grey)

This puzzles me deeply. If all these people on Amazon can read a book and give it rave reviews, how am I supposed to take a “professional” book reviewer seriously? Years ago we didn’t have any choice. Amazon didn’t have customer reviews and we were subjected to the tastes and choices of book reviewers in print periodicals. In other words, the book reviewer’s opinion had more influence on our purchases. This isn’t the case any longer. We now have to vet reviewers as well as books.
I also point out in my older post how sometimes bad reviews do, indeed, help sell books. It’s the main reason why I bought FS, and probably countless others as well.

I also think this is a good example of karma working at its best.

You can read more here.

African American Pastors Attack Obama

I think most of us know that anything too heavily bible related or too deeply rooted in old time religion is not going to be pro gay. And now a group of African American pastors are attacking the President and asking for the Attorney General’s impeachment.

CAAP president the Rev. William Owens attacked Obama and Holder in an interview with The Hill on Tuesday in which he said Obama would not have been able to get away with what he is doing around gay marriage if he were white.

‘If Obama was a white man, he would be impeached,’ Owens told The Hill. ‘Obama has been given a free pass to do what he pleases, but I don’t give him a pass. I’m very black, been black all my life. He doesn’t get a pass. I don’t give him a pass.’

‘He will go down in history as the worst attorney general,’ Owens said of Holder. So far the group has been able to collect a little over 12,000 signatures.

‘The President and his administration are trampling the rule of law,’ the group said in justifying its petition drive.

You can read more here.

Matt Damon and the Bachelor Clooney’s 3 Million Dollar Ad; Seacrest FB Poll on 50 Shades Actors

Matt Damon and the Bachelor Clooney’s 3 Million Dollar Ad

The other day I heard them talking about this on a morning show on TV and I earmarked a search to get more details. I read more, here. Aside from Matt Damon making 3 million dollars, which comes out to about $150,000 per second, the elderly actor, the bachelor George Clooney, is also in the ad but I didn’t see anything about what he was paid.

The article states Damon usually turns down commercial ads. You have to wonder, though, whether or not that’s about integrity or the fact that no one’s been dumb enough to meet his price until now. I really don’t mean to be snarky about this. Most people, including me, wouldn’t turn down that kind of money. But I posted a short time ago where I linked to something that stated Charlie Hunnam was only supposed to get paid $125,000 to play the part of Christian in the 50 Shades movie (I double checked the link and it’s still only $125,000). And now Damon’s getting 3 million for a coffee ad that will be aired in the UK, not the US.

The ad focuses on Clooney’s ­famous charm and irresistibility, showing him being snubbed by an attractive woman who would rather drink her coffee alone. “George Clooney’s inside,” she yells, causing a mob of women to chase after the actor and leave her in peace.

Then, in a shorter complement to the ad, Clooney uses the same ploy to enjoy his own coffee, drawing the frantic females’ attention to the presence of his old friend Damon.

Isn’t that rich, all you “frantic females” out there. Clooney’s famous charm. The bachelor Clooney isn’t hawking his convoluted politics now, he’s hawking coffee. I’m sure he’s not worried about his health insurance being canceled. I wonder if he even checked out the government healthcare web site.

Aside from how blatant this all is during a time when most people in the US are scrambling to figure out how they are going to pay for health insurance after the recent cancellations thanks to the so-called affordable health care act, I can’t help but remember all those old TV sitcoms where Hollywood yanked our proverbial chains and gave us head trips where dumb sitcom characters would actually turn down commercials and money because they didn’t like the product. The Golden Girls did this once with a pizza commercial where Sofia hated the pizza so much she refused to finish the commercial based on principle. That’s right. Poor as a church mouse but she said no to the money because she had principles and integrity. It’s an old tired trope in TV sitcoms geared to fuck up our heads. Makes me wonder if the bachelor Clooney and Damon who is so good at playing gayface actually drink that coffee themselves.

In any event, you can read more here if your stomach can take it.

Seacrest FB Poll on 50 Shades Actors

This afternoon I noticed Ryan Seacrest post an update on Facebook asking his followers about what they thought of the cover of Entertainment Weekly that depicts the actors who will play the leads in the upcoming Fifty Shades of Grey film adaptation, and the comments were more than entertaining. In fact, I couldn’t stop reading them after posting so much about the film over the past year.

Here’s a link to Seacrest’s FB update, with comments. 

One person commented this way:

 And the girl who plays Anastasia looks old and too pale in her skin. You’d imagine someone who had a clumsy look to her, but still attractive. This would ideally be Ashley Green or Blake Lively.

The rest of the comments seem to take the same tone. Others state they would have preferred Matt Bomer or Charlie Hunnam for the male lead. Most would have preferred anyone but who was chosen.

Should be interesting to see how this movie does when it’s released.

Nude Davey Wavey; OUT List 100; Don’t Over Edit

Nude Davey Wavey

For anyone who’s curious, I’m linking to a web site where you can view full frontal nude pics of gay youtube performer, Davey Wavey. As usual, the comment thread is entertaining…trust me on this.

And the mystery is over.

Read More Here…

OUT List 100

Out Magazine does a list each year mentioning 100 people. Some are significant, others questionable. But that depends on personal taste.

Marriage equality advocate Edie Windsor, director Lee Daniels and out actors Wentworth Miller and Jim Parsons take top honors on Out Magazine’s OUT 100 list for 2013.

I think when you read the back story behind some of them it’s even more interesting because it shows how deeply intense it still is for most gay men and women to actually accept being gay, and even talk about it openly. The list is long, but most are worth reading.

Others surprise me, like Brett Easton Ellis.  He was banned from GLAAD awards for tweets he made. But I don’t follow much of what Ellis does, so I rarely link to anything Ellis related.

Read more here, or check out the list itself, here.

Don’t Over Edit

By over edit I mean don’t over criticize another author’s work without taking certain aspects of style and poetic license into consideration. The article I’m linking to now that was posted on Lit Agent Janet Reid’s blog seems to nail this topic in a few lines.

At the start of my career I was guilty of some of that thinking to be sure. I assumed that words or sentences that were “wrong” were mistakes. So I “fixed” them. It took me a while to realize that sometimes those weren’t mistakes, those were style.

This seems to be something novices do more than seasoned critics. I’ve done it, I’ve seen new copy editors do it, and if you’re unlucky enough to get a new copy editor who doesn’t know what he or she is doing it can really fuck up a manuscript and ruin the style and content as a result. I actually once had a copy editor “correct” dialogue…dialogue I’d written on purpose that gave one character a distinct voice. Let’s just say I didn’t back down that time, and one new copy editor received a crash course in how not to edit an author’s style.

In the same respect, there’s one newer m/m author out there who makes almost every mistake in the proverbial book, but his voice and style are both so great it doesn’t really matter because in his case it’s more about the story than a lesson in English. I’m not linking to him because it sounds more like a left-handed compliment and I don’t want anyone to misinterpret that. No one can do what he does, quite the way he does it.

In other words, things like common usage are important to take into consideration, and don’t assume that because your seventh grade English teacher said it was right makes it standard in all fiction.

Read more here….

Fifty Shades Lead Jamie Dornan; Matt Bomer Might Have Made History?

Fifty Shades Lead Jamie Dornan; Matt Bomer Might Have Made History?

I recently mentioned that Charlie Hunnam had backed out of the lead role in the film adaptation of Fifty Shades of Grey. When Hunnam was first chosen to play the lead the fandom heavens opened up and thousands of people protested the choice. Hunnam eventually backed out stating work schedule conflicts. I also read (link below) he was only getting paid $125,000 to play the part, which is significantly lower than most leading men. So far, the new choice of the hour seems to be Jamie Dornan.

Dornan was among the actors shortlisted for the part after Hunnam bowed out almost two weeks ago, with some reports labeling him the frontrunner. Others speculated that “True Blood” star Alexander Skarsgard was the top choice, while Theo James (“Golden Boy,” “Divergent”), Christian Cooke (U.K.’s “Where the Heart Is,” “Magic City”) and Scott Eastwood (“Chicago Fire”) almost emerged as contenders.

According to this article, filming is supposed to begin in November and they are talking about an August 2014 release date. So it looks as if Matt Bomer, the main choice to play Christian with Fifty Shades fandom, is out of the question. There’s never been a set reason why Bomer isn’t playing the lead and it could be he doesn’t want to play the part. Fifty Shades has not only been a bestselling novel that made publishing history for many reasons, it’s also been one of the most hated books in years as a result of some of those reasons. (I liked it; don’t e-mail me)

But that doesn’t seem to have stopped Bomer fans, at least not according to this next article in Variety. The piece goes on to state that Bomer could have made film history had he been chosen to play the part, but I think that’s debatable.

But all those actors primarily work in television. The fact remains that in the year 2013, there is still not a consistent leading gay man or woman on the big screen. Hollywood is still trying to catch up to the BuzzFeed generation, which doesn’t discriminate when it comes to a heartthrob’s sexual orientation. Hopefully, one day soon, a gay actor will crack that glass ceiling.

The reason I think this is debatable is because Matt Bomer would not have made history as a gay man playing a straight lead role. Rock Hudson and hundreds of leading men before Bomer have already proven that gay men can play straight lead roles. The key word here is that Bomer would have made history because he would have been the first OPENLY gay man to play a straight leading role. And as a gay man and an openly gay author I think that calls for debate.

And, if the person who wrote that article in Variety had even been slightly aware of how many women read gay romance…the same type of reader who read Fifty Shades of Grey…they wouldn’t have been surprised at how many fans lobbied for Bomer to play Christian. One more proof of evidence that the mainstream media is highly out of touch with what people are doing these days, as is Hollywood.

As a fan of Fifty Shades the books, I can’t say that I’m disappointed to hear about Dornan playing Christian. I think he’ll not only do the part justice, but I think he has the perfect look for the BDSM parts.

Photo Attribution

Matt Bomer for Fifty Shades? Erotica Author Petition; Greg Louganis Gets Married

Matt Bomer for Fifty Shades

I know my author and social media friends aren’t interested in this, but my blog readers love it and I have to post about it as a blogger. In an unusual turn this past weekend, Charlie Hunnam made it clear he’s not playing Christian in the film adaptation of Fifty Shades of Grey. He blamed his heavy TV schedule, but sources are reporting it might go deeper than that.

I posted about Hunnam getting the part, officially, here. I’ve also been following the story for a while, and I’ve been posting about how many in the Fifty Shades fandom want Matt Bomer to play Christian. And what I find most interesting is that never before in the history of film has there been such and outcry with regard to who should play a character. I actually overheard people in a restaurant arguing about it last weekend. Most want Matt Bomer. (I agree)

Fans can also wish Charlie the best, and then start day-dreaming about all the shirtless men who might get the next shot at satisfying the mildly aggressive “50 Shades” fan base. For their consideration, and yours, here are eight actors HuffPost Entertainment would endorse as co-stars opposite Dakota Johnson in the “50 Shades of Grey” movie.

You can read more here, where there’s a list of eight other possible actors who might be getting the part of Christian. One of them is Matt Bomer…at least according to this list. The list is interesting, including an adorable GIF where Alex Pettyfer is pulling down his pants. But I have to say that so far, at least according to that list, it still seems as if Matt Bomer was meant to play that role.

Erotica Author Petition

In what has erupted into a huge backlash of authors and readers aggressively fighting back against the recent decision by large e-book retailers to remove self-published books from their shelves, there’s now a petition directed toward these retailers that has reached over 11,000 signatures as of right now.

Although the majority of my published books are with publishers, I do have a few self-published titles out, including back listed books that were originally released by a publisher that has now shuttered its doors, I’ve had a book taken down, too, and without a viable explanation. At first I thought it was because of gay content, but it goes much deeper.

This all originated with retail e-book sellers wanting to rid their shelves of self-published erotic e-books that contain things like barely-legal, bestiality, and incest, however, in the process thousands of authors who don’t cross the line into taboo erotica and do follow the standard guidelines that most publishers follow with erotica, have been penalized and their books have been banned as a result. In some cases authors with YA titles that aren’t even erotic have been taken down.

The entire mess started with one little article. And then it grew into what I think has been the biggest shitstorm to hit the Internet in a long time. This is what the petition looks like, and you can go here to sign it.

Jeff Bezos, CEO of Amazon
Michael Serbinis, CEO of KOBO
Leonard Riggio, Founder and executive chairman of Barnesand Noble

Drop the clause of removing Erotica and self-published Indie authors.
[Your name]

To read more about this, check out this article. It gives the shortest and most comprehensive explanation I’ve read so far. Most large media outlets are not reporting the story correctly and they are making it look as if all the books and all the authors are being taken down because they’ve written dinoporn…or something like that. And this is not the case. What’s really happening is that in order to remove the “taboo” books and authors, the large retailers have been using search engines and tag words. So if a book title or blurb even has the word “boy” or “daddy” in it, the book is taken down without review. So if you’re thinking about writing a children’s book and titling it “Daddy’s Little Girl,” you’d better rethink that title. It could wind up in the new slush pile of self-pubbed authors with “Daddy’s Naughty Little Girl.”

And, Kobo is now sending out e-mails. I’ve posted about Kobo before, and how many indie authors aren’t making much money with them.

From my inbox:

To our Kobo Writing Life and self-publishing partners:

 As you may be aware, there has been a significant amount of negative media attention in the UK regarding offensive material that became available across a number of eBook platforms. Kobo was included in the reports from media and we are taking immediate action to resolve an issue that is the direct result of a select few authors and publishers violating Kobo’s content policies.

 In order to address the situation Kobo is taking the following steps:

1.We are removing titles in question from the Kobo platform.

2.We are quarantining and reviewing titles to ensure that compliance to our policies is met by all authors and publishers. We will ensure that content meeting the policy is made available online as soon as possible.

3.We are reviewing our policies and procedures to implement safeguards that will ensure this situation does not happen in the future.

 We are working hard to get back to business as usual, as quickly as possible. We appreciate your patience and understanding in this matter.

 Our goal at Kobo is not to censor material; we support freedom of expression. Further, we want to protect the reputation of self-publishing as a whole. You have our promise that we will do all we can to ensure the exceptions that have caused this current situation will not have a lasting effect on what is an exciting new channel that connects Readers to a wealth of books.


 Mark Lefebvre

Director, Kobo Writing Life

Greg Louganis Gets Married

This is significant to me because I was a child when Greg Louganis was at the height of his career and I feel as if I grew up watching his life unfold…and relating to him as a gay man the entire time.

Louganis and paralegal Chaillot wed on Oct. 12 in Malibu in front of 160 guests, according to People magazine. Their “I Dos” came little more than one year after the two met on

“It has been an incredible journey,” Louganis told the magazine. “I feel like we’ve been through a lifetime in a very short time.”

The 53-year-old took to Twitter to discuss the evening.

I keep telling my brother in New York he should try out to see what happens, but it falls on deaf ears.

You can read more here.

Photo attribution

Fifty Shades Film Stars Announced

Fifty Shades Film Stars Announced

The lead roles in the film adaptation of mega-billion bestseller Fifty Shades of Grey were announced and here they are.

Dakota Johnson will star as Anastasia Steele and Charlie Hunnam as Christian Grey in the highly anticipated film adaptation of the erotically charged novel Fifty Shades of Grey.

Sorry, it’s not Matt Bomer or Ian Somerhalder for the part of Christian. But I can’t say I’m totally disappointed with Charlie Hunnam. I think he’ll do well.

Charles Matthew “Charlie” Hunnam (born 10 April 1980)[1] is a British actor and screenwriter. He is perhaps best known for his roles as Nathan Maloney in the Channel 4 drama Queer as Folk, Lloyd Haythe in the Fox comedy series Undeclared, Pete Dunham in the film Green Street Hooligans, Jackson “Jax” Teller in the FX series Sons of Anarchy, and Raleigh Becket in the film Pacific Rim. On September 2nd, 2013, 50 Shades of Grey author E. L. James announced via Twitter that Hunnam will play the lead role of Christian Grey in the upcoming film adaptation of the series.

I have been posting about Fifty Shades of Grey since before it went mainstream when one online book reviewer slammed it…which caused me to buy it. And it’s been interesting to see how everything has unfolded for the book, and for the author, since that time. I think it’s telling in the sense that even though one book reviewer might not like something, that doesn’t mean it’s a bad book and that other people aren’t going to like it. In this particular case, with Fifty Shades, it’s not only telling it literally screams in volumes that the reviewer miscalculated that one by more than the proverbial mile.

You can read my past blog posts on the topic here. And just for your own personal amusement, I wrote this post the day I discovered Fifty Shades through that bad book review…weeks before it actually hit the mainstream as a big book.

I love irony. AND karma.

If you notice, I didn’t even mention the title of Fifty Shades of Grey because I didn’t want to start a shitstorm with the book reviewer. And I do believe this is really about personal taste and that reviewer has every right to express an opinion. But the viciousness with which that particular review about Fifty Shades was written made me stop and think, so this is what I wrote.

This afternoon I read a review for a different book on a well known romance review web site that was scathing. The reviewer had one of those peculiar names, which is a red flag for me at once. When I can’t pronounce a reviewer’s name, I tend to trust her less. She reviewed the book with the lowest possible rating, and then went on to rip the book to shreds in what appeared to be a narrative that resembled a short story more than a book review.

I didn’t read the book in question. I don’t know the author. I was simply perusing. To be completely honest, I DNF the review because as reviews stand it was awful. There is nothing more annoying than a book reviewer who can’t get the basics out fast, simple, and neat. I lose patience and interest if a review is too damn long. I would imagine others feel the same way. Who has the time?

All this aside, after I read the review I went to Amazon to check out reader reviews for the book in question. Huzzah! The largest percentage of customer reviews on Amazon for this book were five star rave reviews. There were a handful of three star reviews. And one or two one star reviews.

If I recall correctly, Fifty Shades of Grey only had about 200 reviews back then it was so new.

Photo, here.

Fifty Shades for Fifty Cents; Daddy Week P’town

Fifty Shades for Fifty Cents

This isn’t anything all that significant, but this past weekend while running errands I stopped at two garage sales around town and found two copies of Fifty Shades of Grey being sold at different places for fifty cents each.

I wanted to take photos, but didn’t want to infringe on the homeowner’s privacy. But I did ask what they thought of the book and each one said they never finished it…and they’d expected something different.

Daddy Week P’town

This is something new for P’town. I asked two friends who live in P’town part time, and they verified it. There’s an event called “Daddy Days,” which will begin August 10th. It only stands to reason they should have something like this in P’town, with Women’s Week, Family Week, and other events like Bear Week. In this particular case, the event is being sponsored by Daddyhunt social media and will be focused around Crew’s Quarters on Commercial Street. (It’s a nice place.)

However, as with most posts like this, the comments that go along with the “Daddy” article are priceless:

Am I the only one who is creeped out by the term “daddy” ? I mean I call my actual father “daddy” so it’s really strange when it’s in a sexual/romantic context…

this is an honest question … are these daddies like mentors or friends yo younger men or is it strictly a sexual attraction?

This is how the term “Daddy” is defined:

A Daddy in gay culture is a slang term meaning an older man sexually involved in a relationship or having a sexual interest in a younger man. The age gap may differ, but the relationship involves the traditional parental hierarchy of father-son dynamics, the daddy providing emotional support and guidance along with sexual encouragement and nurturing to the inexperienced and vulnerable partner.

If you do a simple search, you can find many things related to this topic.

Photo here

Fifty Shades; Abandoned Books; Facebook Infographics

Fifty Shades; Abandoned Books; Facebook Infographics

Galleycat published an article titled, The Most Abandoned Book List. Of course the infographic was created by, which makes me wonder how accurate it is and how they chose the data, but I thought it was interesting to see that Fifty Shades of Grey and The Causal Vacancy were up there in the top two.

Goodreads has created a great infographic exploring the books most often abandoned by readers on the social network. The Casual Vacancy by J.K. Rowling topped that list, followed by Fifty Shades of Grey by E.L. James.

I don’t think it was a “great” infographic. I think it was boring and they could have just printed a list to make it easier on readers.

Frankly, I didn’t finish reading the goodreads infographic for lack of time. But I actually finished both Fifty Shades and Casual Vacancy, and I like them both, too. For that matter, John Irving’s, In One Person, wasn’t a simple book to finish. But I found that when I reached the halfway point of the book it started moving faster. The same went for Fifty Shades and Casual Vacancy. I think I may have even mentioned that in at least one of my reviews for those books.

Speaking of infographics, there’s also a link in this article to a page that explains facebook’s inforgraphics so that you can pick and choose who you want to follow on facebook and who you want to keep separate in case you’re worried about insulting them with religion or politics, or whatever.

Awkward Facebook situations are now easier to avoid with the wide release of Facebook’s new search bar, Graph Search. By using Graph Search to sort your friends by their stance on divisive topics, like religion or politics, you can immediately figure out which friends to unfriend, hide in your feed, or at least move to a separate list so you don’t offend them with the truth.

I wonder what would happen if I typed in “Which one of my author friends is totally full of crap?” The key word being totally. We’re all full of a little crap at times. It’s just that some are more crap-filled than others (smile).

But on a serious note, you really do have to have a great deal of time to suss out everyone on facebook in your friend list, not to mention patience. I’d rather read a few offensive updates about politics and religion. Do we really take it all that seriously anyway?

Mean Matt Bomer Comments and Hop Against Homophobia and Transphobia; Chris Pine on Women

Mean Matt Bomer Comments and Hop Against Homophobia and Transphobia
This is the first post I’ve done about Matt Bomer playing the lead in the film version of Fifty Shades of Grey in a while. Matt Bomer is a very talented young actor who I’ve seen in a variety of roles. And while I would love to see him in Fifty Shades because I think he’d be perfect, not everyone agrees.
“Only problem for me is Bomer is gay and knowing that, not that I have anything against it, is that it’s a turn off for me,” one fan wrote. “I would know the whole time he’s not really ‘in the mood.’ Sorry if that sounds mean, it’s just about suspension of disbelief. I’m sure many fans who don’t know this detail would find him perfect.”
This comes from a “fan.” I think this fan is an idiot. Because if he/she knew even a hint about Hollywood he/she would understand that most of the actors he/she has been watching all his or her life are gay…they just never told you about it. Aside from that, straight men have been playing gay roles for a long time and no one ever said they were too straight.
So if Bomer does get the part, I think it’s going to be the challenge of his life to show idiots like the fan above that he’s capable of doing it…which most people seem to think he is. This kind of attitude is the reason why so many gay men don’t come out of the closet.
In spite of this “fan’s” comment, Matt Bomer is still the biggest contender for the role.
To read more vituperative (can’t give up that word for anything) comments about being openly gay and being an actor, you can check out this link. Some of these vicious comments are the reason why so many bloggers are doing the Hop Against Homophobia and Transphobia this week. This reaction to Matt Bomer playing the lead in Fifty Shades is proof homophobia exists in even the most subtle forms today. So if you’re not familiar with the Hop Against Homophobia and Transphobia, check out the link above.
Chris Pine on Women 

These are the little pop culture things I find interesting all the time: like what Chris Pine wants in a woman. Pop culture and technology usually play big parts in my novels and short stories, and these little pieces of information often help inspire me with subplots and smaller scenes.

In this case it’s actually more about the way Chris Pine is wearing his beard in the photo, not about his love life. I recently wrote a character with a beard like this and it helps for me to study these photos when I’m describing that character. I would love to show the photo, but I’m not sure about copyrights so you’ll have to check out the link. It’s worth the effort. It’s a great beard and I wish I could grow one like it. The problem is after around 35 years old beards start to turn gray and I don’t have the patience or time to keep up with getting rid of that gray.

In any event, here’s what Chris Pine is looking for in a woman.

“I think anything that any normal man would be looking for: intelligence, beauty and a sense of humor. . . You have to be able to carry a conversation after the initial attraction kind of dies down,” he said.
I couldn’t agree more.