Last November I posted a link to a site where there are Davey Wavey nude photos. Today I’d like to post about how Davey Wavey has reacted to those photos, and how he’s not making any apologies to anyone. I actually didn’t know whether or not he’d posted them himself or someone had discovered them. He explains it all here.
Do I need to say anything else? I think it’s a good example of owning your decisions, taking a positive stand, and never letting anyone else intimidate you for something you’ve done previously. I’ve always thought that was important, even for authors. I once wrote about a burping penis in a parody gay romance loosely based on the TV show American Idol. And it was interpreted as serious literature by one dumb, but vicious, blogger. I have no regrets. I might even do it again.
Fuck with me: it’s the best attitude sometimes. We should all take it more seriously 🙂
Speaking of parody and comic relief, I’ve been working on edits for a new book in the Chase series, Chase of a Holy Ghost, and I needed something that would make the storyline a little lighter. Actually, I needed a few things because the book can be emotional at times. So I wrote a scene where a ridiculous webcaster spoke about anal hygiene and referred to it as anal douchery. You should have seen the comments I received from the editor I hired.
On a more serious note, the fact is that there are certain things gay men should know about anal hygiene. As far as I know, I have never heard once of a parent explaining THIS to a gay teen when talking about the facts of life. In fact, I often wonder how younger gay men now learn about the facts of life with everything becoming more open nowadays. Do parents talk about these things with gay teens? Or do gay teens still get their information about the facts of life everywhere but at home?
In any event, once again, here’s Davey Wavey talking about anal douching. I won’t get into details here, but I often mention it in books just in case younger gay people are reading. It is important information every gay man should know…or at least almost every gay man.
For two men to have anal sex with each other, a certain routine of cleansing must take place. Perhaps, during your first sexual encounter, neither you nor your partner realized this. And then things got disgusting and you never, ever wanted to be a gay man again. And then you found out about cleaning one’s bottom — and how it’s an activity that’s best silently acknowledged, but never spoken about, because: ew. Take it away, Davey.
I’ve posted about Larry Kramer and The Normal Heart, many times. I don’t always agree with Kramer and his beliefs, but this article to which I’m linking shows how difficult it was for him when he first started out. I have no doubts about that. It’s still difficult for all gays, but it must have been torture way, way back then. He produced a film, Women in Love, and it became famous for the biggest taboo of all time: male full frontal nudity.
As Kramer recalled, adapting Women in Love to the screen was the easy part. Getting it produced was much more difficult because it involved the arduous task of negotiating a final approved cut of the movie with the British Board of Film Censors. Even before production began, Kramer sent a copy of his script to the board’s chief, a man named Lord John Trevelyan, who liked to brag, “We’re paid to have dirty minds.” Trevelyan didn’t hold out much hope for Kramer’s project and told him he doubted Women in Love could be filmed at all. “The wrestling scene,” as it was soon to be dubbed, and its male frontal nudity sent immediate shock waves through the BBFC.
If you follow my posts on male full frontal nudity in films, you’ll see not all that much has changed since Kramer used it in his film. I think the most recent full frontal male scene that I’ve noticed was with Bobby Cannavale in Boardwalk Empire, which I posted about here. That was in 2012. I’m sure there might be one or two I’ve missed. But the point is you don’t see it often.
Here’s an excerpt from my still-being-edited (and formatted for digital) WIP. It’s titled, Chase of a Holy Ghost, and will be released sometime at the end of this month.
On Saturday mornings, Jim usually went for a long ride on his favorite horse way out beyond the back pasture. He’d always been big on routine. He wore his favorite old cowboy boots that morning, jeans so old they were torn at the knees, and one of Len’s old cowboy hats because he liked the way it felt. When he reached the creek he stopped and smiled for a moment. He’d scattered Cain’s ashes there, and then Carol Greene’s ashes because there hasn’t been anyone else willing to give Carol a funeral service. Her roots went back to Amish culture and she’d been shunned for being gay and a transgender. He would have climbed off the horse and sat on a rock for a while to pay his respects. It was one of those bright mornings with a slight breeze, perfect for daydreaming. But he had to get back to the house before his mother-in-law, Doris Branson, arrived.
A few hours later, Jim jogged down the back stairs and heard voices in the main hallway. Clinger was barking and Jim couldn’t make out what they were saying, so he smoothed out his jeans, took a quick look in a mirror next to the back staircase, and then headed to the front of the house to see what was happening.
When he reached the hallway, he stopped and took a deep breath. He held it for a moment and exhaled slowly. Doris was hugging Len, and Jim’s mom and dad were standing on the sidelines waiting to greet her. Jim’s mom caught a glimpse of him in the doorway and she rolled her eyes. Jim shrugged and smiled, and then stepped into the hallway braced for battle.
As Jim walked up beside Len, Doris turned from Len and looked down at Culum. “And how are you, young man,” Doris said, with her deep raspy voice. “Are you happy to see grand-ma-ma?”
Culum blinked and took a step back toward Clinger. He called Jim’s mom grandma and he’d told Jim he didn’t like calling Doris grand-ma-ma, with the accent on the last syllable. Jim sent Culum a look, letting him know he wanted him to behave. No one appreciated Doris referring to herself as grand-ma-ma. COAL Ranch wasn’t Downton Abbey. It was Chatsworth, California in the twenty-first century. But in order to keep the peace, so to speak, Jim had warned everyone to humor Doris Branson’s pretentious quirks and make her feel at home for as long as she was there. If that meant calling her Your Royal Highness Jim would have done it.
Doris’s head jerked to the side. “What’s wrong?Aren’t you happy to see grand-ma-ma?” Her voice grew deeper and Jim had to wonder if she had a single nurturing bone in her body. Then he dismissed the thought, feeling guilty because he didn’t know her all that well yet.
Culum looked at Jim one more time, and then he nodded and said, “Yes, I’m happy to see you.”He refused to say grand-ma-maunless it was the last resort. He usually referred to Doris with pronouns.
Jim covered his smile with his palm. Culum had stubborn tendencies that often amused him.
Then Radcliff reached out to shake Doris’s hand. “It’s good to see you again, Doris. It’s been a while. You’re looking well, indeed.”Jim sometimes had a feeling his dad flirted with Doris, which tended to make Helen’s lips turn down.
Doris looked Jim’s dad up and down and said, “Yes, too long, darling. It’s good to see you again, Randolph.”She ran her long French-tipped fingernails down his sleeve and batted her eyelashes. Doris often flirted back, within reason, which also tended to make Helen’s eyebrows arch.
Helen rolled her eyes.
Radcliff didn’t bother to correct her about his name. He seemed to know it would be a waste of time.
Helen reached out to hug Doris, but Doris took a step back and reached for Helen’s hand instead. “Hello, dear, good to see you again.”Doris never used Helen’s name. She didn’t even bother to mispronounce it. She always referred to her as dear or hon. She turned to Len and said, “I hope my visit isn’t a bother. I didn’t know Jim’s parents would be here, too. I can stay at a hotel.”
Jim thought he had mentioned this to Doris. There had been so many things happening he could have forgotten.
Helen smiled and said, “If that would make you feel more comfortable. I’m sure there are a few fine hotels nearby, dear.”
Doris glared at Helen for a moment, and then laughed. “I love your sense of humor, hon.”
Helen smiled. “And I love yours even more, darling.”
Len smiled and looked up at the ceiling.
Jim shot his mom a look for the bitchy hotel remark she’d made. He wanted to laugh, but knew it would only get him into trouble. Jim actually had a better relationship with Doris than her own son. It had been that way from the first day they’d met. It wasn’t that Doris thought of Jim as her own son. In this case it was more that she felt close to Jim and thought they were a lot alike in many ways. Doris had always thought of herself as a victim living among the strong controlling Branson men and she’d learned how to survive with them by not backing down. She considered Len, her own son, just as vicious as all the other Branson men, and often sided with Jim as if he were an ally. Although Len could be aggressive and controlling, Jim humored her. He’d never considered himself a victim.
So Jim stepped up and broke into the conversation before Doris could reply to Helen’s catty remark with one of her own and said, “I just finished getting the guest suite on the third floor ready and I don’t want to hear anything about a hotel.”He put his arms around Doris, hugged her, and said, “You’re staying right here with us and that’s that. And why didn’t you let me know you were here so I could drive out to get you myself?I thought you would call.”
For the first time since she’d arrived she smiled and said, “Thank you so much. I prefer my own driver from Branson Communications. We pay him enough.”She looked at everyone else in the room, including poor little Culum who was just standing there observing on the sidelines, and said, “Now that Jim’s here everything will be fine. He clearly knows how to make an older, lonely widow feel at home.”
While Doris sent Len a fierce look, Jim winked at Helen and said, “I’ll help Doris get settled.”
Helen took the hint and said, “We were just leaving. We’re taking Culum to the zoo this afternoon. Would you like to join us, Doris? We don’t mind waiting.”
Doris made a face and said, “I think not, dear.”She glanced at Culum and frowned. “Grand-ma-ma will schedule something cultural for you while she’s here if there’s time.”That could have meant anything from the symphony to a trip on her private jet up to wine country where Doris had an established relationship with a Catholic bishop. Being a strict Catholic with a great deal of money, she had established relationships with priests, nuns, and bishops all over the world. In fact, she’d met two Popes in person. She collected priests and nuns the same way other people collect stamps. Back east, she often traveled with them. But the one in wine country, she claimed, gave her special blessings and she usually flew up to visit him while on the west coast.
With a blank expression, Culum nodded. The last time she’d been there and she’d taken him to a cultural event they’d wound up touring a convent where the nuns weren’t allowed to speak. The poor kid spotted a life-sized crucifix on a wall in the dark convent, screamed at the sight of a dead man hanging with blood dripping from his hands and feet, and had nightmares for one solid week. Although Jim had been raised Episcopal, and Len Catholic, they weren’t part of any organized religion anymore and they’d decided to raise Culum knowing both faiths. Of course Doris thought Culum should be raised Catholic, and Radcliff and Helen thought he should be Episcopal. But Jim and Len had made it clear they wanted to raise Culum their own way and he could one day make his own choice on religion. And until organized religion fully accepted gay couples and gay marriage, they didn’t want to expose him to hate.
Jim reached for Culum’s backpack on a chair in the hallway and handed it to Helen. “I packed a few things for him.”Then he handed Helen a box and said, “And this is for you to put in your purse.”He didn’t like to make a big thing about this. The box contained an epi-pen just in case Culum needed it. He’d experienced multiple bee stings once and developed a deadly allergy to bees as a result. Jim lived in constant fear of this. There was nothing he could do but watch and be prepared. If Culum had had an allergy to shell fish or nuts Jim could have made a conscious effort to avoid those things in a more relaxed manner, but bees were everywhere and you couldn’t trust them.
After they all walked Helen, Radcliff, and Culum out to the Tahoe and saw them off, Len turned toward the long black limo that had brought Doris there from the airport and said, “I’ll get your luggage, mother.”He called her mother all the time, not mom; she expected it and Len preferred it.
Doris waved her hand and said, “Just get your man to do it. I’m going upstairs with Jim.”
“We don’t have a man, mother,” Len said. “You know that. We do things around here on our own. It’s very casual. We’re just normal folks.”
Doris glanced around the property with a disapproving look. Even though COAL Ranch was one of the finest and most elegant ranches in Chatsworth, compared to her estate in Connecticut it was a small time affair. She frowned and said, “I see that.”She patted Jim’s back and said, “Poor thing. We need to have a long talk soon.”
Jim looked at Len and said, “Len will be more than happy to bring your things upstairs. It’s no trouble at all, Doris.”
Doris looped her arm through Jim’s and they headed back toward the house. “I don’t know how you do it, you poor thing. No full time help here at all, working full time yourself, and raising a child. You really do have to be more assertive, Jim. I don’t care if Len changed his name to Mayfield, my maiden name after my father.Len is still a Branson. These goddam Branson men will eat you alive if you’re not assertive. You should demand full time domestic help, at least a housekeeper. I learned a long time ago that you have to stand up to the Branson men or they will step all over you, trust me.”She clenched both fists and said, “You have to be tough, three steps ahead of them at all times, and never back down. That’s why I’m still here and Len’s father isn’t. He wasn’t going to kill me first.”She sounded proud of the fact that she’d outlived her husband as if they’d been racing to the finish.