Almost a Porn Star

It just seems fitting to start with a quote:

Sometimes when you’re watching gay porn, you don’t notice the guy with the most massive member or the best O-face. You’re looking at the guy with the dead eyes, whose hollow flatness betrays the illusion of the scene. This is the guy who is stiffly going through the motions. Maybe he’s a first-timer. Maybe he got his start doing solo work and the studio promoted him to his first scene with a partner. And he hates it.

Frankly, no. I never did notice that. I don’t think most people do. But the article talks about guys who actually go through this and almost become porn stars. I always thought it took a certain kind of person to do porn for money, and I say that without a hint of judgment. I’m not talking about taking the occasional nude selfie or posting a risque image on Grindr, or wherever. I’m talking about the guys (and women) who make it a living and can withstand that kind of lifestyle. 

It’s a long but fascinating article about how one guy almost became a porn star.

I wondered what happened to the image after you lost ownership of it, when you submitted control to someone else.

In porn, you aren’t just getting dominated by your partner; you’re getting dominated by a group of artists who can represent you however they want. What do they see? Is it really you? Does it matter?

You can read the rest here. Twenty years ago I don’t think the risk of doing porn was as complicated as it is now. So before any of you decide you want to try it out, remember one thing: what goes on the Internet stays on the Internet forever. There’s no back-flipping this time.

Straight Catholics Urge Pope

This is of interest to me because I’ve mentioned before I went through 12 years of Catholic school and so did Tony. Our families are Catholic…old Catholic…and there’s really not much you can tell either one of us about being Catholic we don’t already know. And don’t even try. That was done once and that person lived to regret it. Tell me about the Jewish faith, or any other faith, and I’ll sit and listen for hours. But don’t tell me what I already know and lived.

And what I already know is that our families who are Catholic support us 100%. They support my gay nephew, and other gay family members, friends, and associates. But we aren’t getting an ounce of support from the Catholic church itself, at least not full support in the sense that we can feel equal inside a Catholic church. And it seems other Catholics are now starting to urge the Pope to reconsider the church’s stand on LGBT people.

Ron and Mavis Pirola, a couple who have been married for 57 years, is hoping Pope Francis will agree that loving all members of the family is more important than centuries-old doctrine. 

They believe that welcoming gay couples into the church would serve as a ‘model of evangelization’.

You can read the rest here.  I highly doubt that we’ll see any significant changes in our lifetime. Most of the gay Catholics I know have switched to more liberal Episcopal churches. This could be part of the reason so many Catholic churches and schools are closing down. And, unfortunately, I’ve always believed in Catholic education from an educational POV. It’s just not possible to support it anymore under these conditions.

Gay Virgins Wait for Marriage

This title almost sounds valid, but only if you’re NOT gay. In other words, the reason why so many gay men (I can’t speak for gay women) remain virgins for so long is that they’re almost always in the closet terrified to take that first step out. Most don’t even kiss a guy until their mid to late twenties. In my novel, The Virgin Billionaire, the main character was almost forty before he lost his gay virginity. I know this is probably changing now, and thankfully so, but speaking from personal experience most gay men don’t cross that proverbial line until they’re well into their twenties. And marriage has absolutely nothing to do with it. In fact, most of the gay men I know lost their virginity to women, trying to fool themselves into believing they were straight.

However, the article is interesting because it explores a different POV most people don’t realize even exists…the fact that there are gay Christians.

A self-identifying Christian gay man is asked, “What if it doesn’t work out and you wind up ‘saving yourself’ for the complete wrong person?”

And he responds, “That’s why people like me save sex for marriage and not for ‘I kinda like you.’ The process of marriage goes a long way towards making sure we enter into a sexual commitment with a sound mind. OK, but what if it still doesn’t work out? Sure, that happens. Well then we’re really getting into the moral question of divorce…suffice it to say, there are some situations where I would probably seek remarriage.”

So many find this refreshing…the concept of gay virgins, as if we’re all running loose having sex everywhere. I guess I do, too. But what I find really refreshing in a novel sense is that it’s wonderful to see gay men getting this choice now. I didn’t get it, and neither did the gay men I know. We remained virgins out of absolute unadulterated fear and anxiety that I wouldn’t wish on anyone. Which is why I’m short on patience for people who try to tell me what it’s like to be gay.

You can read more here. 

Advocate & Out Use Porn Sites To Inflate Traffic

I find this interesting because until now I never even heard of “pop-unders.” They are the ads that you might see if you’re into porn, on your favorite porn sites. But you probably won’t even notice them. I’m going to let the article explain this so I don’t screw it up.

Viewers may be surprised to see the home pages of Out.com and Advocate.com appear as pop-unders (see browser tabs on screen shot, right), behind such X-rated fare on PornHub.com as Hospital Gangbang and Mature Blake Tops Silver Daddy. Among the other pop-unders in this inspiring category is LiveJasmin.com, featuring nude shows of female strippers.

They do this, allegedly, to inflate their popularity. But this one is complicated, and it comes with a full disclosure, so you’re going to have to read the rest here.