Time To Ditch Toxic Positivity
I recently went through something difficult in my life involving the sale of our home of 18 years, and I’ve been getting my fair share of toxic positivity for the last month now. I think we all go through these difficult times in our lives and toxic positivity never helped anyone. And I’m thrilled to see people talking about it now.
I do believe in positive thinking in a broad general sense. I also believe the subconscious mind has no mind of its own and it absorbs whatever we tell it. But there are times when positivity does, indeed, become toxic.
“While cultivating a positive mind-set is a powerful coping mechanism, toxic positivity stems from the idea that the best or only way to cope with a bad situation is to put a positive spin on it and not dwell on the negative,” said Natalie Dattilo, a clinical health psychologist with Brigham and Women’s Hospital in Boston. “It results from our tendency to undervalue negative emotional experiences and overvalue positive ones.”
Here’s more. I think sometimes you just need to face the bad times, too, and work through them any way that’s right for you.
Parents Won’t Let him Tell His Brother He’s Gay
This is from one of those advice columns that we see all the time in those mainstream magazines. This one is from The Atlantic.
I have to say it’s one of the most disturbing coming out stories I’ve read about in a long time.
She kicked me out of the house the next morning. I told my dad why a year later. He wasn’t happy that I was gay, but he didn’t reject me like she had. He hugged me and told me, “You’re my son. That’s all that matters.” I thought his acceptance, though reluctant, would usher in an opportunity for reconciliation with my mom, but that didn’t come to pass.
Here’s the rest. The reply is excellent.