What Does Barely Legal Mean?; James Franco’s Doing Gay Stuff Again; Queer Millenials Are asked Stupid Questions

What Does Barely Legal Mean?

The other day on the Internet I saw a photo of a guy in real life who is almost 40 years old holding hands with a young woman who just turned 19. The implication was obvious, that they were romantically involved. I’m NOT judging it, but it did take me aback. I don’t think I would have been so taken aback if it had been a 25 year old and a 45 year old. It’s the barely legal part that really made me wonder. I really am curious about what motivates a middle aged man (or woman) to be attracted to someone who is barely legal.

And you’d think that because I write erotic gay romance I’d be more open to these things, and that they wouldn’t make me wonder. But the truth is that I have never written anything with barely legal characters and I never intend to do that. First, the publishing industry does, and always has, frowned on barely legal content. Second, I have this belief that if I wouldn’t do it in my own personal life, I’m not going to make a character do it. And this has nothing to do with ageism. I couldn’t care less if a 60 year old dates a 30 year old. For me, it’s just the barely legal thing that makes me wonder.

With that said, here’s an interesting article I found about why barely legal porn is so dangerous.

Men often try to excuse their desire for barely-consenting-age women under the guise of human nature—namely, our innate instinct to reproduce. The issue with that argument is that a woman’s childbearing ability doesn’t peak until between the ages of 22-26, so the reproduction case doesn’t really stand when it comes to lusting after teens. Another theory for why men desire too-young girls is the anxiety of aging. An older man may feel uncomfortable or inadequate with themselves—specifically their sexual performance—and are able to feel superior in situations with someone with less life experience (teenagers are significantly more impressionable than even twentysomethings). This desire to have authority and control over molding another human being that you’re having sex with is toxic, to say the least.

Here’s the rest of the article.  

James Franco’s Doing Gay Stuff Again

Evidently, there’s something about gay content that James Franco just can’t resist. And the truth is that I usually like what Franco does…I “get” it, sometimes when other people don’t “get” it. I wonder about him, too.

A new HBO show called The Deuce will explore the rise of that Times Square, and with it the history of New York City’s ’70s porn scene — gay and straight. And who wouldn’t want to watch that? Well Rudy Guiliani probably won’t be live-Tweeting the premiere.

Add to the mix a stellar production team — The Wire’s David Simon and George Pelecanos, as well as a pilot and finale directed by Breaking Bad and Game of Thrones regular Michelle MacLaren — and we’re already setting our DVRs. 

James Franco will be starring, producing, and directing in the series. Of course I’ll be watching it. The topic alone intrigues me. I missed all this. I’ve only heard about what NYC was like during the 70s with respect to gay culture. And I’ve heard some wild stories first hand from older gay men who experienced it. In fact, I have older gay friends who won’t even go near Times Square now because they think it’s too much like Disney World.

Here’s the rest. 

Queer Millennials Are Asked Stupid Questions

Before I get into this post I’d like to mention that I’m not that put off by the word “queer” anymore. I used to be put off by it, but I’ve changed a lot in the last ten years. And I think that’s because I’ve learned that the word “queer” is more about how people identify. I get that. I don’t happen to identify as “queer,” but I understand why other people do. And from now on whenever I’m referring to people who identify as “queer” I’m going to use that word proudly.

I get into this stupid question thing a little in my next book, Said With Care. People think nothing of asking gay people stupid questions that are either none of their business, or don’t make much sense. Most of the questions are insulting and promote gay stereotypes. I used to know a woman writer who would e-mail me questions about gay men and gay culture all the time, which I’m sure she was using for her own m/m romance books. Unfortunately, her fiction always took on the tone of a gay documentary…boring. I didn’t mind at first, but eventually I started to feel as if I was her own personal gay lab rat and I backed away from the friendship totally.

But all gay people get these questions.

 What’s the one question you’re most tired of hearing? That’s what a reporter at The Tab asked several queer millennials. And the responses range from downright stupid (“Can I have some fashion advice?”) to borderline offensive (“Don’t you just ever feel like a bit of c*ck?”).

20-year-old Sam, who identifies as gay, says “Straight guys always say to me ‘Would you f*ck me?’ I reply ‘Like no, not really, cos you’re f*cking straight.’”

Other questions he gets a lot: “Can I have your fashion advice?” “Tone it down a bit?” and “Can you be my gay best friend?” 

The rest is here. It’s interesting. There’s obviously a long way to go before we break down the gay stereotypes that other minorities have managed to make taboo in public conversation. In other words, there are certain questions you would never ask a person of African American descent. And the same rule should apply to anyone who falls under the LGBTQ+ umbrella.

Kendle’s Fire

A PG Rated Gay Romance 



 Not All Gay Books Have Sex
In Their Prime by Ryan Field

Amazon




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