Month: May 2016

Gay Walt Whitman No One Mentions; Nearly Naked Ben Ryan; Bad Gay Tops In Bed

Gay Walt Whitman

Yesterday I saw Walt Whitman trending on Twitter so I checked it out and discovered it would have been his birthday. I rarely follow things like that closely…I can’t even remember my own birthday half the time…but I thought it was interesting that so many years later no one on Twitter mentioned Whitman’s ties to the gay community. I’m not even sure why that is. Are they afraid to say it? Or they just don’t know?

In any event, here’s a good article I found about Whitman and his longtime partner, Peter Doyle.

In fact, though, it can be argued that Whitman wouldn’t have risen to his lofty stature if Doyle hadn’t become his muse. Doyle inspired some of his partner’s best-known works and also caused the tone of Whitman’s poetry to become more optimistic.

You can read more here, and there’s a photo of Whitman with Doyle. I think we really need to talk about these things a lot more, and talk about Nick Jonas a lot less.

Here’s another excerpt:

In the correspondence, the men often spoke of their love for each other. In one letter, Whitman told Doyle, “I think of you very often. My love for you is indestructible,” and in another he wrote, “I don’t know what I should do if I hadn’t you to think of & look forward to.”

Nearly Naked Ben Ryan

Ben Ryan is an AIDS activist and he goes about it in a slightly different way. 
 
“For the last 15 years,” Ben said, “I’ve written about the HIV epidemic as a reporter.” He currently covers science as editor-at-large for POZ Magazine, and getting his facts straight is incredibly important to him — especially when every detail of each new HIV or PrEP study is parsed and debated online. “The way I make sure my back is covered is I fact check like crazy,” he said. “Even one word can change the meaning of something. If I do get something wrong, I’m really upset. I’m a perfectionist.”

You can check the rest out here, where they go into detail about his fundraising and Broadway Bares. I haven’t read any of his articles about HIV or PrEP, but I am going to make a point of doing that now.

Bad Gay Tops In Bed

Here’s an article that discusses eleven possible reasons why a gay top man in bed might not be that great at what he’s doing. It is kind of speculative, though. I think every man has a different approach.

4. The top asks when and where he may cum.
If a top’s penis is ready to climax, allow the penis to climax.  The greatest part of sex is natural chemistry. If a top and bottom are enjoying a sexual experience without commands or instructions, then the grand finale should be as natural as long as the bottom is not poked in the eye by the top’s semen.

They’re all interesting…and I could probably add a few more. I often get into these things in my books with characters. But once again, a lot of this is a matter of preference and chemistry.

You can check it out here

Unabated

The Arrangement

Nick Jonas On Gay Sex Scenes; Straight Dude Goes Gay; Amber Heard On Johnny Depp

Nick Jonas On Gay Sex Scenes

Here’s another story about Nick Jonas, and now it’s about his take on gay sex scenes. I guess because everyone has to talk about that…the gay sex part. I’m so tired of it.

As far as we know, Jonas is straight, but he plays gay…and according to this article many have said he panders to the gay community.

“On Kingdom I have a sex scene with a guy. Is it always this thing have I, has Nick? No. But it’s my lips, it’s my hands, it’s my body, even if I’m playing a character. So technically I have done that, so I wouldn’t say I haven’t, because that would be lying.”

There’s more here.  

I have no comment. And I think that’s thanks to Colton Haynes coming out so brilliantly. He gave us all hope for something better and probably doesn’t even know it.

Straight Dude Goes Gay

This one really doesn’t make much sense to me, because I knew…like millions of other gay men knew…I was gay at a very young age. That has nothing to do with accepting the fact that I was gay. That took years. But I knew because the attraction was always there. 

And this kind of makes me wonder…

A straight man named “Mike” says he walked in on his gay roommate “Alex” making out with another dude and felt a funny sensation.


“I thought I was going to throw up,” he confesses in a recently-deleted Reddit thread. “I felt bad for being as disgusted as I was, since there’s no good reason for me to have a reaction like that.”

From there he goes on to become gay.

You can read the rest here. Most of the comments seem to agree with me. However, it is a nice straight guy fantasy story. You know, the same old “gay for you” trope that’s getting a little tired, too.

Amber Heard On Johnny Depp

I have to admit that I don’t think anything has shocked me as much as when I saw so many people…many who are women…supporting Johnny Depp in spite of the allegations of domestic abuse by Amber Heard. They literally ran to Depp’s defense on Twitter even before Amber Heard got her story out there.

And now she’s speaking up.

Bisexual actress Amber Heard is denying that she has made up allegations of domestic violence against estranged husband Johnny Depp in order to get a big divorce pay day.

Heard, who met Depp when they filmed The Rum Diaries together, was granted a restraining order last week.

Heard has a bruised eye in a photo accompanying the restraining order and claims Depp smashed his phone into her face during an attack that took place on 21 May, according to TMZ.

You can read more here. The way people ran to Depp’s defense reminded me of what happened with Bill Cosby and Woody Allen when news about them first broke. I just think it’s an odd thing to do without hearing all the facts, especially when it comes to something as serious as domestic abuse.

Unabated




 



The Arrangement

 


Nick Jonas On Gay Sex Scenes; Straight Dude Goes Gay; Amber Heard On Johnny Depp

Nick Jonas On Gay Sex Scenes

Here’s another story about Nick Jonas, and now it’s about his take on gay sex scenes. I guess because everyone has to talk about that…the gay sex part. I’m so tired of it.

As far as we know, Jonas is straight, but he plays gay…and according to this article many have said he panders to the gay community.

“On Kingdom I have a sex scene with a guy. Is it always this thing have I, has Nick? No. But it’s my lips, it’s my hands, it’s my body, even if I’m playing a character. So technically I have done that, so I wouldn’t say I haven’t, because that would be lying.”

There’s more here.  

I have no comment. And I think that’s thanks to Colton Haynes coming out so brilliantly. He gave us all hope for something better and probably doesn’t even know it.

Straight Dude Goes Gay

This one really doesn’t make much sense to me, because I knew…like millions of other gay men knew…I was gay at a very young age. That has nothing to do with accepting the fact that I was gay. That took years. But I knew because the attraction was always there. 

And this kind of makes me wonder…

A straight man named “Mike” says he walked in on his gay roommate “Alex” making out with another dude and felt a funny sensation.


“I thought I was going to throw up,” he confesses in a recently-deleted Reddit thread. “I felt bad for being as disgusted as I was, since there’s no good reason for me to have a reaction like that.”

From there he goes on to become gay.

You can read the rest here. Most of the comments seem to agree with me. However, it is a nice straight guy fantasy story. You know, the same old “gay for you” trope that’s getting a little tired, too.

Amber Heard On Johnny Depp

I have to admit that I don’t think anything has shocked me as much as when I saw so many people…many who are women…supporting Johnny Depp in spite of the allegations of domestic abuse by Amber Heard. They literally ran to Depp’s defense on Twitter even before Amber Heard got her story out there.

And now she’s speaking up.

Bisexual actress Amber Heard is denying that she has made up allegations of domestic violence against estranged husband Johnny Depp in order to get a big divorce pay day.

Heard, who met Depp when they filmed The Rum Diaries together, was granted a restraining order last week.

Heard has a bruised eye in a photo accompanying the restraining order and claims Depp smashed his phone into her face during an attack that took place on 21 May, according to TMZ.

You can read more here. The way people ran to Depp’s defense reminded me of what happened with Bill Cosby and Woody Allen when news about them first broke. I just think it’s an odd thing to do without hearing all the facts, especially when it comes to something as serious as domestic abuse.

Unabated




 



The Arrangement

 


Confessions From Men With HIV; Underground Gay Night Clubs; John Hamm’s Big Penis

Confessions From Men With HIV

Here is a series of memes where men who are living with HIV talk candidly.

And the future is bright! Having HIV doesn’t mean what it once did — detecting the virus early and starting the right course of meds means a full, happy and healthy life is very much within reach. In many ways, knowing you’re positive and taking the proper course of action is safer than not knowing your status at all.

At one time I would have been totally put off by the expression in this article, “and the future is bright…” Because while yes, the future is bright, there are still a lot of issues that are never addressed in gay presses honestly. I know people living with HIV and they do, indeed, have perfectly normal lives for the most part. However, you have to get blood work every three months, you have to live with possible side effects of HIV meds (and there are side effects), and then you have to make sure you take the drugs daily. There are money concerns (the drugs aren’t cheap…thousands of dollars), health insurance issues, and it just continues. 

However, I’m not put off anymore when I read things like this. I realize now there are a lot of people writing at gay presses who just don’t know any better. And, most of all, HIV is not a death sentence anymore. It’s a manageable disease and I believe in a positive approach.

You can read what these men say here. I think the one that hits me the hardest talks about the stigma that’s still attached to HIV. That stigma needs to go away.

You’ll want to read the comments with this one. I’m not sure how true they are, but one comment makes allegations about the validity of the quotes. I honestly don’t know. 

Underground Gay Night Clubs

I have to admit that I love underground gay clubs of any kind. There’s something about the gay connection and being a gay man that’s hard to describe. And I think I assimilate about as good as anyone else out there these days. But sometimes you need to be with other gay men just like you. 

This one is about a circuit party in Germany.

Revolver is one of Berlin’s biggest monthly circuit parties, showcasing an impressive lineup of DJs, go-go boys and performers from the international gay underground scene. Since its launch just a few years ago, Revolver has quickly become one of the most popular underground parties in all of Germany, and has expanded to other cities as well, including Cologne and Mannheim.

You can check out the photos here. I think it’s safe to say that this one is mostly about the “G” in LGBT.

John Hamm’s Big Penis

Here’s an Esquire article about comedian Catie Lazarus and an interview with John Hamm.

To be fair, guest Jon Hamm started it. After he made an awkward dick joke, Lazarus expertly tried to steer the ship back to how Hamm feels about being valued for his good looks. When Hamm answered, “There is so no way to answer this without coming across like a giant dick,” Lazarus, without missing a beat, said, “Yeah, that too,” in reference to the constant chatter about Hamm’s giant wang. His reaction is priceless:

You can watch the video here. Aside from the fact that I think John Hamm is about the best looking man on the planet, I don’t think you should miss this.

Unabated


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Guy Masturbating With Eggplant; Big Time Scruff Fails; Penis Size and the Ancient Greeks

Guy Masturbating With Eggplant

This article sort of speaks for itself. And I really don’t want to go into detail. I also don’t like eggplant very much.

It all began very innocently in the story of how a man was caught masturbating with an eggplant up his butt.
There was a bunch of travelers on a long road trip in Thailand, with everyone either deeply asleep or engrossed in a book or their phones.

You can read all about it, here, and there’s a video. It’s hard to believe anyone would do this in public.

Big Time Scruff Fails

Here are examples of what you don’t want to do on Scruff…Scruff is a hook up app.

Of course, once you’ve located a potential candidate, you want to make sure you say the right thing so as not to scare them off. One bad joke or off-color comment can totally kill the deal.

I think it’s interesting because remaining cautious in what you write anywhere online doesn’t only apply to hook up apps. I find myself constantly watching everything I write in DMs to people just so they don’t get the wrong impression. It’s tricky nowadays, and you can’t take anything for granted. There are a lot of people who take everything so literally. And so many people were born without a sense of humor.

Here’s the rest.

Penis Size and the Ancient Greeks

If you’ve ever wondered why Greek statues tend to have small penises, this might explain it.

 “Greeks associated small and non-erect penises with moderation, which was one of the key virtues that formed their view of ideal masculinity,” explains classics professor Andrew Lear, who has taught at Harvard, Columbia and NYU and runs tours focused on gay history. “There is the contrast between the small, non-erect penises of ideal men (heroes, gods, nude athletes etc) and the over-size, erect penises of Satyrs (mythic half-goat-men, who are drunkards and wildly lustful) and various non-ideal men. Decrepit, elderly men, for instance, often have large penises.”

There’s more here. There are comments. Now I know why I’ve always preferred the Satyrs.

Unabated








The Arrangement

Nick Denton, Peter Thiel, Gawker, and Hulk Hogan; Gay Guys and Straight Guy Arm Pits; Girls In Gay Bars

Nick Denton, Peter Thiel, Gawker, and Hulk Hogan

There was a new twist to the Hulk Hogan/Gawker lawsuit that I posted about last month. Peter Thiel, billionaire and paypal co-founder, has been funding Hogan’s lawyers behind the scenes…and for alleged reasons that date back.  I’m not getting into the legalities, allegations, or the opinions here. But I am linking.

Denton wants this to happen:

I’m going to suggest an alternative approach. The best regulation for speech, in a free society, is more speech. We each claim to respect independent journalism, and liberty. We each have criticisms of the other’s methods and objectives. Now you have revealed yourself, let us have an open and public debate. The court cases will proceed as long as you fund them. And I am sure the war of headlines will continue. But, even if we put down weapons just for a brief truce, let us have a more constructive exchange.

This one really gets into a lot of issues, including free speech and outing. You can read more about it all here.

Once again, with free speech there are always consequences…and opinions.

Someone in the comments said this…

Freedom of the press does not give the press license to cross boundaries involving private behavior. The same principle is at stake when women complain about the posting of nude selfies that were stolen from their cell phones.

I’ve posted my thoughts a few times on Gawker stories over the years. 

Gay Guys and Straight Guy Arm Pits

I doubt it’s a secret to anyone that gay men love arm pits, and this only makes things a little more intense.

Someone posted this on reddit…

“I want to bury my face in a straight guy’s armpit,” the man confesses. “I want to worship a part of his body that he’s been trained to think of as dirty or undesirable. I want to inhale his scent and make him feel pleasure in a way he’s never thought about before.”

And then straight men responded to it in various ways.

You can check that out here.

I actually believe this is part of gay culture…a small part, but it’s still there.

Girls In Gay Bars

Here’s more about the topic of girls going to gay bars…and how they behave there.

This week’s entry from Johnny Sibilly (which, OK, is also technically not a meme but if you can’t tell, we’re going to be very loose with that definition) falls in the “funny because it’s true” camp.

Look, we love that queer spaces are inclusive spaces, and we would never, ever tell someone they can’t or shouldn’t enjoy a night out at a fabulous gay venue. But that doesn’t mean we aren’t going to raise our eyebrows any less when we bump into this kind of behavior head-on in the wild.

You can check that out here, where there is a video that parodies how some of these women act in a gay bar. And I use parody loosely because I have seen this before in gay bars.

The comments get even more honest…and a little bit mean.

Then again, not all women do behave this way in gay bars…I have seen that before, too.

Unabated





The Arrangement

 

Simon Cowell and Gay Acts; Gay Sex Causes Earthquakes; Why Men Send Dick Pics

Simon Cowell and Gay Acts

The main reason why I stopped watching American Idol here in the US long before the final season was because I kept getting annoyed at the constant “gay” jokes that went on between Simon Cowell and Ryan Seacrest…always initiated by Cowell. It’s not that I don’t have a sense of humor, but I just got tired of Cowell making those snide gay remarks…remarks he would never have made about any other minority. Maybe I was being too sensitive, however, this article I’m linking to now makes me wonder.

It’s an interview with Britain’s Got Talent’s, Danny Beard about his thoughts on Simon Cowell and gay performers/acts.

Simon buzzed Yanis Marshall, the gay dancer in heels, in the final two years ago. He’s buzzed other drag and cabaret performers before. Do you think he has a problem with gay acts?
I don’t think he has a problem, I just don’t think he gets it. It’s not his world. When I first came out and did Rocky Horror, a lot of the comments were about my voice. As it was a musical, he could get it. It fit somewhere in his mind. Because I didn’t do a musical, he just didn’t understand it. After the night was over, he came up to me as said, “I’m really sorry, I just really wanted you to do a musical”. Because it wasn’t a musical, he just didn’t get it. I don’t think he’s got a problem. With his power, and position, I don’t think he could have a problem like that in public.

Here’s the rest of the interview. But I actually think Beard nails it with the comment above. Most straight people just don’t get it. But if you don’t get it, you do, indeed, have a problem. Actually, it’s called homophobia.

Gay Sex Causes Earthquakes

Here’s one you have to read a few times to figure out.

A Muslim cleric has defended the rising attacks on LGBTI people as it ’causes earthquakes’.
Mallam Abass Mahmud, a prominent religious figure in Ghana, made the claim after reports of gay people being assaulted or even killed in the capital Accra and surrounding areas.
In an interview with News Ghana, he said: ‘Allah gets annoyed when males engage in sexual encounter and such disgusting encounter causes earthquake.
‘Should we allow such a shame to continue in our communities against our holy teachings?

You can check that out here

Why Men Send Dick Pics

This is enlightening, especially if you’ve ever done dating apps…or even Twitter for that matter. In short, it’s why men send dick pics.

‘In the gay world, a dick pic is the equivalent of small talk, especially on any sort of sex app,’ Tanner, a 32-year-old in marketing, said. ‘There’s usually a hello, a few back-and-forths before showing your dick is the expected next step. At this point, dick pics aren’t exciting anymore. I don’t even try to take good ones myself because it just doesn’t matter — they’re more of a sign you’re breathing than any real barometer of whether a dude will have sex with you.
For Ryan, a 27-year-old cook, dick pics are the ‘ultimate sign of confidence’.

You read this one here. I honestly don’t know how accurate this is.

Unabated





The Arrangement