Month: March 2015

Pinkstart Crowdfunding; Called His Neighbors Faggots; Straight Guys Into Anal Stimulation; Jamie Foxx’s Transphobic Jokes

Pinkstart Crowdfunding

Here’s a new web site that another author showed me that’s crowdfunding geared specifically for the LGBT community. I don’t know much about it, and I’ve never done crowdfunding myself, but I guess this is the same principle as and

If you have an awesome idea for a creative project and you need the funds, this is your place. Start creating a campaign!

Starting a campaign on Pinkstart is easy, and free.

It’s an easy site to navigate and some of the projects look interesting. I’ll be posting more about it as I see projects coming through with LGBT artists I know.

Here the link where you can check it out yourselves.  

Called His Neighbors Faggots

A prison guard who allegedly called his neighbors faggots and expressed he wanted them executed on social media has been suspended. 

Richard ‘Rick’ Pilarski Jr, who was a cell block attendant for the Cheektowaga Police Department, made the comments on Facebook.

He was writing after an anti-gay activist in California filed a ballot measure for a ‘Sodomite Suppression Act’ – which calls for gay people to face the death penalty.

For all of you who think things are so much better for gay people, this should give you an example of what we’re still dealing with now. This happened in NY state, but it could have been anywhere in the world. And if they aren’t calling for an execution in public, they are silently thinking about it in private.

You can read more here.  

Straight Guys Into Anal Stimulation

This doesn’t surprise me at all. And the main reason is that I dated a few straight guys in my time and it basically corroborates everything I learned from them.

“Our anuses have thousands of nerve endings that respond to stimulation,” a columnist by the name of “Jake” writes in Glamour’s Sex and Dating section. “I learned this firsthand in my twenties when, after several drinks at a bar, I went home with an old college friend. We fooled around for a while, and then I suddenly found myself on all fours as she used her hands up front and stuck her tongue where the sun don’t shine.”

Another thing is true, too. From what I recall straight guys are not shy about what they want. But to be perfectly honest, you really have to be into certain things to enjoy them…both parties. Not everyone is, so don’t let articles like this mislead you into believing that everyone out there likes to, well, eat ass.

And you’d better make sure you keep it clean. And I mean squeaky clean to the point where that ass shines like Sirius. Not Sirius the big mouth m/m book reviewer from THAT web site who gets it wrong and insults many gay men 99% of the time, Sirius the shining star.

You can read more here.  

Jamie Foxx’s Transphobic Jokes

Jamie Foxx has been making headlines this week because of transphobic jokes he made in reference to Bruce Jenner. It’s really interesting because this kind of joke wouldn’t even have been noticed ten years ago, and now it’s considered wrong…as it should be. I hate to sound too PC about these things, and I really try not to be too PC with regard to laughing at myself, but these comedians that come from places of privilege really need to start rethinking what is and is NOT funny. Comedy has changed, like it or not.

What was the intention, for instance, behind Jamie Foxx’s recent jokes at Bruce Jenner’s expense at the iHeartRadio awards?

The answer seems limited to obtaining a cheap laugh, putting someone down and playing off tired stereotypes of transgender people.

And that’s not comedy, that’s just mean.

If I had kept track of every single homophobic joke I’ve heard in my lifetime, either blatant or passive aggressive, I could fill a book. The jokes where the straight guys joke around about being gay are the ones that always got to me the most. It’s not that you can’t tell gay jokes. I’m willing to laugh at myself as much as the next guy. But you have to be smart enough to find the right context.

Unfortunately, the comment thread with this devolves into something you might want to miss.

Here’s the link with a video of what Foxx said.

The Way We ALMOST Were

A Gay Parody  


Unprecedented Full Frontal Male Nudity-Dudity; The Overnight Preferred Terms for Penis; Days Of Love Beverly Hills Book Award; Six Inventions That Changed Your Sex

Unprecedented Full Frontal Male Nudity-Dudity

For a change, this article talks about turning things around, so to speak. Instead of more female nudity in a film the focus is on more male full frontal nudity. The movie is called The Overnight, and they weren’t shy about what they were going for. I think the creator of Orange is the New Black did this one.

When planning The Overnight with executive producer Mark Duplass, Brice remembered wondering aloud, “What if we made a movie that had more male nudity than female nudity? Why don’t we subvert that convention when it comes to these kinds of movies?”

And subvert they did. There is one scene in The Overnight in which one of the female characters is topless, but it is later overshadowed completely by the movie’s extensive full-frontal dudity (a term for on-screen male nudity coined by my former colleague Chris Lee). 

You can read more here. I don’t have links to photos yet. But I’m sure we’ll be seeing them soon. They even came up with the word “dudity” to make us laugh, I guess. But I hope that doesn’t catch on.

And most of all, the film actually looks and sounds good aside from the nudity and cheesy PR.

The Overnight Preferred Terms for Penis

Jason Schwartzman and Adam Scott who are in The Overnight, have preferred terms for penis. It sounds as if The Overnight goes much deeper than its nudity and they wanted to come up with tasteful ways to refer to the penis. Because the word “penis” just isn’t good enough.

In any event, here you go.

“I really think ‘unit’ is funny, or joint,” Scott told HitFix during our sit-down interview for “The Overnight.”

The most comedic term for penis “depends” for Schwarzman. “I like ‘unit,’ or ‘manhood.’ I used to really like ‘Johnson,’ though I feel like it’s overused.”

The particulars of the script and the circumstances in “The Overnight” called for the actors to don prosthetic penises for their nude scenes. And, one other fun fact, the prosthetics needed to be “wrung out” after shooting a swimming pool scene.

Though, really, while those were funny scenes, “I really love what the characters are going through… and Jason’s character’s really helps [my character] come out of his shell. It’s super sincere and he really helps Alex, my character, come out and feel good about himself. He never expected to feel this way about himself and his body,” Scott said. “This guy was really generous with him.”

Aside from the fact that I still prefer to call a dick a dick, and the dicks in this movie aren’t real dicks, it looks like a great movie and you can read more about it here. 

Days of Love Beverly Hills Book Award

Most of you know about the book Elisa Rolle created this year titled, Days of Love. A lot of hard work went into this book and it was nice to hear that it just won The Beverly Hills Book Award.

This is from my inbox:

Dear Elisa, It is our great pleasure to inform you that you are a Winner in the LGBT Non-Fiction Category of the 3rd Annual Beverly Hills International Book Awards. Your book, Days of Love: Celebrating LGBT History One Story at a Time, truly embodies the excellence that this award was created to celebrate, and we salute you and your fine work. The entire team at the Beverly Hills Book Awards sincerely hope your participation in our contest will serve you well in creating the success your book deserves. You have our warmest congratulations. Warmly, ELLEN REID, President & CEO Beverly Hills Book Awards

I know there’s a great deal of significance right now…for a book like this. But I also think that down the road, from a cultural and historic POV, this book will be important for the future, too. We’re only beginning to see books about LGBT culture, especially those that don’t always focus on the negatives. Even though it is and always will be a niche market, it’s still a viable market.

You can check out Days of Love here on Amazon, too. There’s a section of the book devoted to my husband, Tony, and me, along with many other LGBT couples you will either know or get to know.

Six Inventions that Changed Your Sex

Here’s a video that shows how six inventions changed the way we have sex.

 We take it for granted that our sexual menus contain as many items as the Cheesecake Factory’s. Just don’t get any ideas with those mozzarella sticks — not pretty.

But sex has evolved along with the rest of human civilization in some wonderful ways. And some less-than-wonderful ways — did we really need ‘sexting’?

Aside from that dumb quote/commentary I just excerpted, the video is actually interesting and very well made.

You can check it out here

The Way We ALMOST Were

A Gay Parody  

Convicted Gay Killers Marry; Indiana Boycotts; Steve Grand on Gay Singers In the Closet; Jane Litte/Jen Frederick Fallout

Convicted Gay Killers Marry

The first gay UK couple to marry while in prison, serving life sentences for murder, are Mikhail Gallatinov and Marc Goodwin.

According to The Independent, the newlyweds fell in love during the time they spent in prison.

The 20-minute ceremony was held in front of a few prisoners, family, and four invited officers.

You can see more here. It’s hard for me to comment because of the nature of their convictions, but straight couples do this all the time from what I hear.

Indiana Boycotts

This is a tough one for me because I was talking with a friend on Twitter the other day who lives in Indiana. She’s straight and she doesn’t discriminate against anyone. From what she told me, most people in Indiana don’t discriminate either and they are just as frustrated and angry as the rest of the country over what their Governor did.

But some kind of a statement has to be made, and if everyone pulls together and boycotts the entire state I’m hoping it will help the people who live there, too…eventually. I personally don’t have anything against anyone who lives in Indiana.

In any event, San Francisco…the entire city…is now boycotting Indiana:

Mayor Ed Lee (D) said on Thursday that he objects to Indiana’s Religious Freedom Restoration Act that allows businesses in the state to cite religious beliefs as a legal defense for businesses to refuse service to lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender individuals.

Lee said in a statement that the city will not use taxpayer money to fund any city employees’ trips to the Midwestern state.

I also read on Twitter that the online company, Angie’s List, is boycotting Indiana as well.

You can read more here. 

Steve Grand on Gay Singers In the Closet

I didn’t know this one. There’s a country singer who came out as Josey Greenwell, and after about a year, he went back into the closet and changed his professional name to Nate Gree. He’s now trying to market himself and brand himself to straight audiences. I’m sure a lot of you are wondering why would he do that? How could he not come out during this wonderful time for gays?

The answer is simple. Even though gay marriage is legal in many places, and even though gay rights are moving forward, the discrimination still outweighs the support. I get it and see it every day. If it’s not outright discrimination it’s total dismissal.

Steve Grand:

‘It saddens me because I feel his decision to not be out and open in what appears to be actually in some ways going back into the closet professionally, I see it as a reflection on the sad state where people feel like they can’t be out,’ Grand tells The Daily Beast.

It is sad. I agree with Grand. However, it is a reality for anyone in any of the arts. Gay people not coming from a place of privilege don’t get the same opportunities straight people coming from places of privilege get.

‘I feel bad for him, that he for whatever reason doesn’t feel he can’t be welcomed as an artist and he’s branding himself as a country artist but he doesn’t feel like that he can make that part of his work.’
Grand’s approach has been completely different.

Again, I agree with Grand. I feel bad for him, too. But I also understand him and I don’t fault him for doing what he has to do to survive. I don’t think there’s a gay actor, singer, or even writer who hasn’t thought about this at one time or another.  

‘I think I wanted to be out because I felt it sets a good example,’ he says. ‘We need as many people out as possible. I felt comfortable doing that and I’m all about that for myself and I encourage other people to do the same.’

My biggest hope for Steve Grand is that he breaks the proverbial glass ceiling as an openly gay singer and he gets the support from the LGBT community he needs, as well as support from the mainstream. It’s still too soon to tell. Grand has a lot on his side, and I’m hoping his new album does very well. But to be completely honest, I’m waiting to see how things work out for him. I know all too well how they work out for gay authors. Ricky Martin is out now, but he wasn’t back when millions and millions were buying his albums. Martin is in a much better position than a young openly gay singer who wants to keep it real.

So go out and support Steve Grand. Buy his album. You’ll like it. And not just because he’s gay. He’s very good. 

Of Green he says: ‘I don’t know his story, what his journey’s been like, so I don’t want to make any judgement other than it’s a reflection of the world that he believes in and it’s a sad reflection for me.’

I think that’s a perfect way to put it. No one knows what his journey is like. But I do know what a gay journey is like in general. I have that experience now. And if you’re not straight, white and privileged, it’s not going to be an easy journey.

You can check out Grand’s statements here.  

Jane Litte/Jen Frederick Fallout

I put this at the bottom of the post because it feels so creepy posting about it I’d rather not focus on it for too long. I’m not sitting in judgement either. Most of you reading this right now know who Jane/Jen is and if you don’t there are plenty of links out there with a simple search for Jane Litte and Jen Frederick.

The more I read about this the more discouraging it gets. The good, innocent people who have been hurt by all this are what bother me the most. My heart just breaks for them.

I read this comment, in part, on a romance review blog:

Im hurt that I respected that line more than the person who drew it.

It will be days and weeks and months before we tease out all the implications of this. Trust is fragile. I’m hurt for many indie authors who were so gracious, so generous. Who welcome newbies with open arms and open their careers to share data, strategies, information… everything. I’m hurt that future newbies might not find those arms and doors so open.

You can read the rest of the comment here, plus there are others discussing the Jane/Jen disclosure. Frankly, I can’t say I’m hurt or surprised. It’s what I would have expected. Past is, indeed, prologue.

But my heart does go out to those who were hurt by this. I hope they can trust again. It’s not all bad. You only come across this kind of behavior once in a while in publishing. 

The Way We ALMOST Were

A Gay Parody  

Adam Lambert Says Hey Gurl; Fire Island Blaze; Tim Oakes’ Full Frontal Nudity

Adam Lambert Says Hey Gurl

Pop singer, Adam Lambert, made statements about how he uses the phrase “Hey Gurl.”

Lambert also lumped Sam Smith into his statements:

I think with me and Sam, there’s definitely an understanding there, like: ‘Hey gurl, how you doing?’ [laughs] But you know, there’s only a few of us actually, on a mainstream level. I think we’re building a little clique, I hope, but I haven’t met that many. I mean, Elton John is amazing, what a sweetheart, and Boy George is also incredible. I’ve sat down and had lunch with him before, he’s so smart and has been though A LOT, and now he’s in a really good, healthy space, and loves music and is DJing and is still really connected to pop culture. He was really interesting to talk to.”

All this came in reply as to whether or not there’s a “fraternity” among certain gay male musicians.

I found the article here. 

I thought one of the comments said it best:

I guess Ricky Martin, Lance Bass, George Michael, Michael Stipe, Clay Aitken, etc. don’t respond to “hey hurl”. 

Tony and I have been going to the beaches in Provincetown since 1995. We once sat behind a gay couple with Boston accents and they referred to each other with feminine pronouns and “hey gurl,” too. We couldn’t help but overhear them and their really bad disco music. We tried to be patient, but we eventually got up and moved as far away from them as we could get.

 Fire Island Blaze

It’s interesting because I didn’t see much about this anywhere else. Ten years ago I would have heard about this all over the place. For those who don’t know, Fire Island is a long time gay ghetto off Long Island, NY, where gay men have been gathering during the summer months since long before most of us were even born.

And this week there was a huge fire there that burned a few well known gay landmarks.

Officials say many structures, including the famed Grove Hotel, the Ice Palace, and the Holly House, were all destroyed by the inferno, which affected “the entire downtown business district” near Holly Walk and Bayview Walk.

The Ice Palace nightclub, in particular, is a Fire Island institution. In addition to being a popular venue for circuit parties, its stage has hosted some of the biggest gay icons in the business including Liza Minnelli, Carol Channing, Lady Gaga, Chita Rivera, John Waters and Justin Vivian Bond.

There’s more here. 

Fire Island is one place with which I’m not too familiar. I do know people who go out there often, but I’ve always preferred the Hamptons.

Tim Oakes’ Full Frontal Nudity

This isn’t new, but I must have missed it. I don’t think I’ve ever posted about it in my humble quest to find more male full frontal nudity that isn’t considered “porn.”

 Sandbach RUFC rugby star Tim Oakes has an enduring, timeless appeal — or at least his full-frontal nude pic does. Although some queer sites are claiming the photo just leaked, it’s actually been circulating for at least five years and appeared in this NSFW compilation video that was posted in 2009. A quick Google search indicates the Welsh athlete posed for many more explicit photos, none of which we can post here. And there’s even rumor of a, ahem, solo video out there somewhere.

You can check that out here. The link that is there to see the nude photo doesn’t work, so I found this one.  This won’t let you down. It might even bring out the more artistic side of you. It did me.

Side note: has anyone else noticed there’s this new trend now where men are doing full frontal nude shots, “accidentally” linking them to the public, and then removing them as fast as they can? What’s up with THAT? Don’t you guys know that when you do that you not only defeat the purpose but you really turn people off big time.

The Way We ALMOST Were

A Gay Parody  

Aaron Schock Leaves Office; Jane Litte Writing as Jen Frederick; Where Looking Went Wrong

Aaron Schock Leaves Office

Although I’m not political, I do get why so many LGBT people find the GOP a threat, and why they tend to attack anyone even remotely associated with the GOP. And this article I’m linking to now is a good example of how vicious and petty things can get.

Aaron Schock left office today and he said this:

“I leave here with sadness and humility,” he said. “For those whom I’ve let down, I will work tirelessly to make it up to you.” Then the other shoe dropped, as Schock compared the questions he’s faced over his lavish spending to the hardships faced by the nation’s 16th president.

“I also know that every person faces adversity in life,” Schock revealed. “Abraham Lincoln held this seat in Congress in one term. But few faced as many defeats in his personal, business and public life as he did. “His continual perseverance in the face of these trials — never giving up — is something all of us Americans should be inspired by, especially when going through a valley in life.”

The rest is here, with a video. I don’t know much about Schock, so it’s hard for me to comment. I’m not all that thrilled with any politicians these days.

Jane Litte Writing As Jen Frederick

In short, the founder of the DearAuthor Romance Review blog, Jane Litte, recently disclosed she’s been writing NA romance secretly with the pen name, Jen Frederick. I’m not getting into all the details here, but you can read more at the link below. Jane/Jen seems to be taking all kinds of criticism, especially in the comments.

Here’s something from the post:

Imagine my surprise, then, to realize that Jane is on more than one of these loops with me as Jen Frederick. I find myself…not okay with that. Not because I’m ashamed by anything I’ve said, but because I even have to sit here and worry about it. And I’m feeling even sicker for the authors who thought they were in a place that was safe to share certain things and did so who would NOT have done so had they known Jane was present. Do I believe Jane would or has intentionally retaliated against these authors if they said something negatively about her site, her books, her writing partner, or the EC case or any myriad of things? No. But that doesn’t change the fact that it feels like a violation. And the thing that readers of this post need to realize is that JANE KNOWS THAT.

You can read the rest here. It’s very long, and complicated. And I don’t want to sound as if I’m being glib in this post. I’m not sure where I stand at this point. I do think the biggest mistake Jane/Jen may have made was in underestimating her power and influence as a blogger.

I made the decision a long time ago to work hard at keeping every single thing I put out there about me as an author as real as I can get it without losing too much privacy. It’s been hard because I can’t use social media like other people and interact with my family or my personal friends. For me, that would be too complicated. I can’t find the balance. So I keep it all work and book related. That’s partly because I don’t want certain things about my life disclosed, like when a close family member passes away, or I had to put my fifteen year old dog down on this New Year’s Eve unexpectedly. It’s not that I’m unwilling to share this. It’s that it would make my grief twice as difficult to have to deal with condolences from readers and other people I work with. I’d rather grieve in private, on my own terms, and process my losses alone.  There are some things in life that gut you to the point of not wanting to speak about them in public.

There are also advantages to keeping it real, for the most part, and I think most readers appreciate that. I hope readers know that when I post about something personal in my life I’m not just making it up. In the same respect, I don’t want to sound holier than thou right now. In the course of a single day I come across harmless tweets, updates, and blog posts from celebrities, from authors, and from bloggers that I know are embellishing everything about their private lives. I understand this and I never hold it against them because in doing this they are creating a larger than life persona, which is also something I think people want/crave. Do you really find self-published boring author, Betty June Johnson, who posts updates about her ugly buck-toothed kids interesting? Do you care what good old bad selfie queen Betty June Johnson had for dinner? Was that gray burger she ate “yummy?” Does that really make you want to read her books…or even care about her boring ass? In many cases, I think keeping it too real is the biggest mistake an author can make when trying to promote a brand. Because boring is not a brand. And this is something with which I’ve wrestled since I started getting published over twenty years ago.

In any event, Jane/Jen Litte/Frederick kept her pen name a secret and continued to blog at the same time without telling anyone except for a few close friends. But more than that, her books turned out to be successful. And while it’s not something I would have done, I can’t help but think this might be the most ingenious marketing plan I have ever seen to date. For a long time I thought Jane Litte was holier than thou, to the point where I thought she was a little creepy (those pencil skirts?). Now that I know she’s not any better than any other author out there promoting a brand, I can’t help but find her more interesting. So I’m still on the fence about the whole thing and it’s going to take a long time for me to process it.  

Where Looking Went Wrong

Frankly, I’m not too sure Looking went all that wrong. I liked it and I would have continued to watch. But this article is interesting anyway, because it basically agrees with me and it leaves everything up to the people commenting to offer suggestions about why Looking went wrong…and you should see all the free speech there.

As one of the few series on television that was created by a gay man (Michael Lannan), written by a predominantly gay staff and that starred many out actors (Jonathan Groff, Murray Bartlett, Daniel Franzese, Russell Tovey), it’s a shame there wasn’t more support from LGBT viewers, who criticized the series even before it had premiered for not representing every facet of the queer community.

And that is a shame. We don’t support each other the same way other minorities do, not in TV, not in films, and certainly not in publishing and in books.

Here’s one comment.

I refused to watch based in the trailers alone that showed us “Pretty White Gay Guys With Problems.” As if a bunch of pretty white (oh wait, there was allegedly one Latino guy) guys allegedly unable to find love is real. I think the bigger problem is that the guys who actually look like all of these model-actors in this series are never looking for love – they’re only looking for instant gratification for their narcissism.

There are more comments that are mixed. 

I’m not sure how I would comment. I liked the show. I liked Patrick, I thought it was well written, and it needed more time to develop. But there were flaws. I will admit that. And as usual, those flaws were mostly due to self-indulgence. In other words, it might have been too real.

The Way We ALMOST Were

A Gay Parody  

Adam Lambert Unapologetically Gay; Unapologetic Will Ferrell Gay Movie Jokes; Looking and Douching Is Canceled

Adam Lambert Unapologetically Gay

Pop singer, Adam Lambert, is speaking up about why it is so important to him to be unapologetically gay. I think the message is important.

This is his statement:

I think there’s a simple power in being unapologetic and open about who and what you are and not letting it prevent you from getting what you want. In that way, I think I’ve made a statement. My wish is for gay to become less of a label, and more of just one of many great colors in the collective box of humanity. I’m not a separatist. I’m all inclusive.”

I found it here. 

I tread with care here because I know not all gay men are able to be unapologetic about being gay. I don’t blame them. But I do happen to agree with Lambert and I’ve been doing the same thing for the past ten years.

And it’s not always easy to do.

Unapologetic Will Ferrell Gay Movie Jokes

I think the title of this article speaks loudly…”Will Ferrell Is Not Apologizing For the Anti-Gay Jokes In His Crappy Movie.”

They never do apologize. I’m not surprised he’s not apologizing, and I’m not surprised his movie is being called crappy. For me Will Ferrell has always been the epitome of heteronormative crappy movies from days gone by.

In any event…

Critics have blasted the film for what Variety calls “some of the ugliest gay-panic humor to befoul a studio release in recent memory.”

One of Ferrell’s character’s biggest fears of being raped by another man. (Because prison rape is the funniest thing ever!) After learning “gang slang” with some African Americans, he tries giving a blowjob to a man he meets in a public bathroom. (Because men blowing men is also the funniest thing ever!)

But don’t expect any apologies from Ferrell for his passe, homophobic, racist, not to mention just plain bad jokes. He thinks they’re totally uproarious.

“Any time you’re going to do an R-rated comedy, you’re going to offend someone,” he recently told the AP. “But that’s kind of what we do. We provoke. We prod. We also show a mirror to what’s already existing out there. We’re playing fictitious characters who are articulating some of the attitudes and misconceptions that already exist.”

I don’t think anyone has mentioned to Ferrell that comedy has changed and evolved over the years. This is what comedy (and all communication) does as time passes. The same comedy that was so popular in the early 20th century vaudeville shows did not work in the latter part of the century. Lazy racist, gaycist heteronormative humor doesn’t work anymore now.

You can read more here. 

Looking Is Canceled

This really bothered me. The LGBT HBO series, Looking, that I’ve been posting about since it started has been officially canceled.

After two years of following Patrick and his tight-knit group of friends as they explored San Francisco in search of love and lasting relationships, HBO will present the final chapter of their journey as a special.  We look forward to sharing this adventure with the show’s loyal fans.

There’s more here.

The article goes on to talk more about how Looking fans soon became polarized after the first show.  Just this weekend Tony and I had a small dinner party here and two people got into a discussion about Looking. One loved the show, one didn’t (Tony). I think the issue with Looking is that it got into too much reality and it showed a segment of gay men that people don’t always like to recognize. They think we’re all the same…Modern Family…but we’re not.

And I like Patrick. I’ll miss him.

Frankly though, I blame all this on Patrick’s douche scene (smile). Although gay men do actually douche, they just don’t douche on TV. It’s just not done.

The Way We ALMOST Were

A Gay Parody  

Jane Litte/DearAuthor Writes NA Romances; How Liz Taylor Would Be Shocked Now; Sean Cody Pornster Arrested

Jane Litte/DearAuthor Writes NA Romances

I normally wouldn’t post about this because it’s not pop culture or LGBT related…or even related to good looking men. However, I find it interesting to book publishing in general.

Jane Litte who started the DearAuthor reader oriented romance book review site recently posted a letter to her readership announcing that she’s been writing NA romance novels with a pen name for quite some time now. Allegedly, no one knew this…or that winter in Russia is cold. 

In part:

So I went ahead and created a penname, Jen Frederick, and published Undeclared with no expectations about what would happen. And, much to my surprise, it sold well. So I wrote another one. And another. And began to learn about the publishing industry from an entirely different perspective.

You can read the rest here. It’s kind of like discovering Martha Stewart has really been the owner of McDonald’s all these years.  

No further comment.

How Liz Taylor Would Be Shocked Now

Actually, the article I’m linking to claims Liz Taylor would be “horrified” if she were alive today and she saw the number of young gay men with HIV. This comment was made by Taylor’s granddaughter in a recent interview and it’s all posthumous conjecture.

Naomi deLuce Wilding, 40, tells The Telegraph that “a real complacency” regarding HIV/AIDS in the gay community had already set in before her legendary grandmother’s death at the age of 79 in 2011. 

“Even before she died, when my grandmother was pretty ill, she was horrified to see that,” Wilding said. “Sadly I don’t think she had the strength to say what she really felt at that point.” 

You can read the rest here. 

I have nothing but respect for Taylor and for what she did during the time she did it. When no one was speaking up about AIDS, she was right there waving her arms. But I don’t like to slam people with HIV now, because living with HIV is now considered living with a chronic illness, not a death sentence. And I don’t like to attach a shame/blame stigma to anyone with HIV. Everyone has a different circumstance. I would, however, like to see more awareness so that young gay men know exactly what it’s like to live with HIV. It’s not just a matter of taking ARV drugs. And I just don’t see this awareness anywhere. At least not in the mainstream where most people get their information.

Sean Cody Pornster Arrested

Anyone who reads this blog knows I’ve never once slammed anyone in the adult entrainment industry. But even I have to admit that sometimes these adult entertainers leave me wondering.

In this case a guy I’m not familiar with, Jarec Wentworth, was allegedly arrested for felony extortion by the FBI. He allegedly threatened to make a wealthy victim’s sexual “liaisons” public if the victim didn’t pay up.  Jarec got quite a bit of money, until he got greedy.

Brank was put under surveillance after he successfully blackmailed the unnamed wealthy gentleman out of some $500,000 in cash and an Audi R8 valued at $180,000.

But after he (very greedily) demanded another million and a condo, the man went to the FBI for help. They set up a sting at a Los Angeles Starbucks, and on March 4th, arrested Brank. Inside Brank’s car at the time of arrest was a loaded .357 Magnum revolver with additional ammunition.

The rest is here, with a photo. 

This is something I find personally interesting because the next book in The Rainbow Detective series is focused on kidnapping and extortion. This one almost sounds as if it’s part of my plot. Except for one thing: my main character has diphallia…two dicks. I’ll post more about that soon.

The Way We ALMOST Were

A Gay Parody  



Gay Catholic Priest Dissolves His Union; Michael Sam and Dancing With the Stars; Is Gay Marriage a Shocker?

Gay Priest Dissolves His Union

I don’t totally understand how things like this work in the UK, but according to this article a gay Catholic priest dissolved his civil union with another man and as a result the gay priest is allowed to perform his “priestly duties” again.

No one knew the priest was gay or that he was in a civil union. When it was disclosed the priest entered into a civil union…according to him…to keep his partner in the country I’m guessing the church released the priest from his duties when they found out about it. I’m also guessing it’s legal to have a civil union like this in the UK, because I know that if you try to marry someone just to keep them in the US there can be legal complications. They’re very strict about that here, with everyone.

In any event,

The civil partnership was exposed last year, with the priest telling the Mail On Sunday that he agreed to it in order to keep Hussain in the country.

Saying no sex was involved, Minchew said he and Hussain were ‘old friends’ and their fathers had served together during World War 2.

It is unknown what has happened to Hussain.

In the letter, Newton said: ‘Donald has had time to reflect on the events which led me to withdraw him from public ministry and, after much prayer and discussion with Donald and the Archbishop of Southwark, I have decided to reinstate him in his priestly ministry.’

Here’s where I found this. I don’t like to speculate, and there is a lot of information missing, but it looks pretty self-explanatory in a general sense.

The thing that bothers me the most is that people allow the Catholic church that kind of power over them. I’ll just never get it.

Michael Sam and Dancing With the Stars

This article is more about Michael Sam not talking about Dancing With the Stars than it is about DWtS. I haven’t been watching Sam dancing because I heard he was dancing with women, so I’m not up to date on this angle of the story. And it’s not because I’m against men dancing with women, don’t take that out of context. I would have liked to see Sam dancing with a man on DWtS. But I guess that’s just too soon for US network TV. I hate to be a stickler about this, but in this particular case, because Sam has been so open about being gay, I think it’s a little disingenuous he’s not dancing with a man. Now there’s a long held taboo for you: men dancing with men in public. When was the last time you saw that happen outside of a gay bar? 

In any event, the good news is that Michael Sam is still talking about football and still talking about getting into the game as a pro.

‘As long as I still have that will, as long as I’m still healthy and can play this game, you will continue to see me fighting to get in this league,’ Sam told reporters after completing his drills.

‘I am very confident that I will be playing football this year somewhere,’ Sam added. ‘So we’ll leave that at that.’

Sam was cut from the St. Louis Rams before the regular season began last fall then latest cut from the Dallas Cowboys practice squad.

If not signed by an NFL team this year, would he consider going north to play for the Canadian Football League.

‘If that’s an opportunity, then I will take it,’ Sam said.

Michael Sam doing this with football is far more important to me than Michael Sam dancing with a woman on TV, and I’m hoping he gets what he wants. This will not only be a huge breakthrough for gay men and football, but also a way to show those in pro sports who are still in the closet it is possible to come out. And maybe, just possibly, a way to see men dancing with men on TV.

The rest is here. 

Is Gay Marriage a Shocker?

Someone sent me a private message on facebook this weekend with a link to a post that left me wondering. I’m not linking to it here, but it was written by a woman who writes what she refers to as “same sex” stories and she made a comment stating that gay marriage is not a “shocker” to anyone anymore. It was done in such a glib, presumptuous way I had to force myself to read it a few times to make sure I was being fair and I hadn’t missed something important. And, this is not the first time I’ve seen someone who is not gay refer to gay marriage in this glib way.

However, my first impression was correct. And in coming from her place of privilege because she’s not gay, she knows absolutely nothing…yet claims to know everything… about how LGBT people live and survive in this world. …But you should see her tell everyone how to write gay stories.

This author is not the focus of my post right now. I don’t care about her or her glib attitude. My focus is on how gay marriage is still being received. Just to show you one example of how gay marriage is still something very new to the majority of Americans, here’s a link to an article I found that talks about whether most of America is comfortable with gay marriage…or not.

Beneath marriage equality’s recent progress is “a layer of uneasiness and discomfort,” the executive summary says. “While the public is increasingly embracing LGBT civil rights and equal protection under the law, many are still uncomfortable with having LGBT people in their families and the communities where they live.”

You can read more here, where there are interesting statistics that prove how gay marriage is still, in fact, a “shocker” to most Americans. Again, we have a long way to go. And I don’t need articles, links, or statistics to explain this to anyone. I can tell you from my own personal experiences, as a gay married man, most people are still uncomfortable and it is still a “shocker.”  Most people don’t even know how to respond when I introduce Tony as my husband.

Side note that could also apply to people writing “same “sex” stories and blog posts about them: If you’re not an African American and you’re going to write about the African American experience in books, at least find out what issues African American people are dealing with these days. Don’t assume anything just because your BF told you so. That makes you both stupid and politically incorrect (not to mention racist), because you’re basically insulting all African Americans when you do this. This same theory could apply to any minority, including gays.

The Way We ALMOST Were

A Gay Parody  

Trevor Donovan as Kit Acklin; Steve Grand All American Boy Release Date March 24th; Morning After Glow

Trevor Donovan as Kit Acklin

I’ve been remiss with pop culture pieces lately…because there have been so many unusual things happening. But I’ve been meaning to post about this, and I will post a more in-depth piece soon for several reasons. One, I think my readers will enjoy it. Trevor Donovan played a gay character…Teddy…on Beverly Hills 90210 a few years ago and he stunned so many his fandom grew practically overnight. Two, the character Donovan is playing, Kit Acklin, is one of the most interesting in the old wild west. Three, I’ve been following Donovan in social media and I notice that a lot of m/m readers follow him, too. I think they’ll LOVE this new mini-series called Texas Rising.

The History Channel has had some major past success with period miniseries (Hatfield & McCoys) so they’re hitching their (covered) wagon to the lone star state. The network is currently filming Texas Rising, an eight-hour miniseries about the Texas revolution and the rise of the Texas Rangers (the oldest state law enforcement agency in North America.)

The project has an impressive cast, folks like Jeffrey Dean Morgan, Chad Michael Murray, Ray Liotta, Oliver Martinez, Max Thieriot (from Bates Motel), but we’re most interested in Trevor Donovan‘s participation (Donovan has been a favorite with TheBacklot readers since his days as Teddy Montgomery on 90210.

You can read more about Texas Rising and Trevor Donovan here. And I will post something more detailed, with photos…yes, I have permission to use photos…very soon. Of course the focus is on Donovan and the show in general, but I’m trying to find links about Kit Acklin and I’m learning that what’s there is excellent, but there’s really not much out there in general about the old wild west.

Mark your calendars. Texas Rising will be launched on Memorial Day weekend this May 25th. 

Steve Grand Album Release Date

These days there seems to be an interesting trend with anything LGBT related. The mainstream press will pick up on something gay trendy and beat it to death until they’ve had their fun and all the straight people have been entertained. They usually don’t follow up. And in this case I’ve been seeing this trend with the new release of LGBT singer Steve Grand’s album, All American Boy. I haven’t seen much support from the mainstream…yet.

SO, let’s give the guy a break and start sharing this news. This is significant to LGBT culture as well as pop culture. And while the straight people and James Franco continue to exploit and appropriate us, the least we can do is help each other out when something important comes along.

I think everyone reading this post knows about Steve Grand by now. If you don’t you can find out more with a simple search. His new album, All American Boy, is going to be released tomorrow…March 24th…and he’s been working hard to promote this for the past few weeks all over social media.

Steve kicks off his debut album, All American Boy, set to be released on March 24. The album includes the hit singles All American Boy, Stay, Back To California and Time. Steve’s KickStarter campaign used to fund the album was the 3rd most successful fundraiser on the website ever.

There’s more here at Grand’s web site. I’ll be buying this one on iTunes, and I hope everyone else who is buying it helps spread the word about it.

Morning After Glow

This is the type of pop culture piece I personally love. It’s a new photo shoot by photographer Paul Dedona and it captures some of the most interesting moments you’ll ever see.

It makes sense that the photo shoot has a “morning after” feeling. Petit Q’s underwear designs are all about sex appeal, like good luck charms if you want to get lucky. The underwear modeled by Andrei ranges from the flattering to the deviously distracting. The Bondage Bikini and Majax Boxer both offer full-coverage designs, technically. They leave the back and front covered, but your sides and legs are emphasized by sexy straps.

Whether or not the pair is masculine or feminine doesn’t matter. Like we said, Paul Dedona captures Andrei’s confidence. It lets Andrei pull off every Petit Q design thrown his way.

There’s more here, where you can see the photos.  

The Way We ALMOST Were

A Gay Parody  



Human Penis Transplants; First Gay Bar Experience; Five Things About Your Ass

Human Penis Transplants

This one is pretty self-explanatory, no matter how shocking it sounds.

And it’s not just for cosmetic purposes. Doctors in S. Africa performed a penis transplant on a 21 year old who lost his penis to a bad circumcision. Another reason I’m not fond of the entire concept of circumcision, at least not without giving the man a choice. Most of us don’t get that choice.

“We’ve proved that it can be done — we can give someone an organ that is just as good as the one that he had,” Frank Graewe, head of the Division of Plastic Reconstructive Surgery at Stellenbosch University, said in a statement. “It was a privilege to be part of this first successful penis transplant in the world.”

They don’t say where they got the organ, but I’m assuming it’s like any other organ donor program.

You can read the rest here. I think it’s wonderful for people who need it. My one question is would they be able to use an artificial penis? And next, what are the odds of the body rejecting it?

First Gay Bar Experience

I remember my first gay bar experience very well. It was absolutely wonderful. I was still in college and I drove all the way from Madison, NJ to New Hope, PA where there were three gay bars at the time. It was the first time in my life I felt as if I could be comfortable, and I’m not exaggerating this. I knew I’d found a home, so to speak. It wasn’t about sex, alcohol, or even dancing. It was the absolute comfort of being with my own kind. I didn’t have any expectations that night; that came later.

In any event, here’s an article that talks about first gay bar experiences. As you can see, they are varied, which is understandable because so much has changed in the past twenty years. I also think they’re from very young gay men who don’t know a world of complete homophobia…like it was in the 1990’s.

“Yesterday I went to my first gay bar for the first time and I felt like a total different person.”

You can read the rest here. I think it’s interesting how some of them reacted.  I’d like to see the question presented to gay men who went to their first gay bar prior to 2000.

Five Things About Your Ass

This is one of the most obtuse articles I’ve read in a while, but it’s not completely without merit. For one thing it’s great clickbait, and for another the ass is important to gay men. Yes, that ass.

Queerty spoke to expert fanny physician Elie Schochet, MD, of Ft Lauderdale, who has become a popular go-to man on anal health. His town hall events on the subject are swarming with gay men, and his “Team Happy Hineys” is even the largest AIDS Walk group in south Florida this year.

“I’m a straight man who tells gay guys how to use their ass right,” he told us. “It’s been a real education on both sides. But the medical facts are way too important not to talk about this openly.” The good doctor definitely has no anal shame.

You can read the rest here. I didn’t know a few. In fact, I never knew that in some cases some men will never physically be able to bottom. And I never knew gay men were supposed to get pap smears. I’m still on the fence about all of it, though. Do I need to be told to eat fiber?

The Way We ALMOST Were

A Gay Parody